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I'm trying to get my life together.
When I was 9, my dad was murdered and it sent my mom into an over protective mode where I became sheltered. I am now 28 years old, live with my mother, never drove and make my money online. It has worked so far since it got us a new home but I need to be more independent
I need to be like a man that my dad would be proud of.
Right now, I'm getting a beginner permit but I won't lie, I am fucking scared. I want to desperately drive to eventually find work and be a real man, yet I feel like it's too late for me. I basically grind online to make either 200 to 300 dollars a week, it helps with bills and rent, yet that's shit money.
But with this high anxiety, I can't work with people since I become this stumbling idiot with panic attacks. I've tried going outside to get out of this shell but it doesn't work, plus my neighbors seem to view me weird since I'm home all the time, even though I am working.
I just feel that I am failing my dad and feel so lost right now.
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>>18021161
Ever talked to a therapist? It's not "too late" for you, 28 is still pretty young for a man, and you've been through some real shit
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>>18021161
Good for you. Doing what you feel is right is being a man. The anxiety will get easier. You will find others like you and it will become easier. Goodluck
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Here's something life is a lot like driving a care. Us late comers to the driving never think we can or are ever going to drive. But then we fucking do it and it's awesome. Being a late driver my self has helped me be a better driver then others. Please aproach everything in life like your just learning how to drive.
Also you should think about talking to a therapist. You can find free ones and they can be there for you and give you high fives and shit. Also I'm a late comer too so never stop growing OP.
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>>18021161
Yeah, you just need to take the first steps. Get out the door, meet people, and the anxiety will go away slowly over time. Remember that every day will just be an improvement over the last.
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>>18021161
the easiest way i found to get over anxiety is when you feel it coming along think 'does this matter?'
remember that no chance you get is going to be your 'last chance'. so to feel anxious overi t is silly. if you fail, you just try again tomorrow. you arent going to end up WORSE than you are now, so when i feel the anxiety i do what you do. i say 'i need to be a man and do this anyways'.
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My dad died of brain cancer when i was 10 and although thats not the same as your situation, i still ended up sheltered and with a bunch of anxiety and depression thru life. Let me tell you-- get a fuckin therapist. Huge help. Just to have someone to bounce shit off of, someone to ramble your retarted thoughts and insecurities off to to and get a thoughtful response, someone to give you a hand navigating a transition into the real world. There's no heroism in going at this shit alone. I just recently stopped going to therapy because i can handle my shit (im 24) but i went for about 2-3 years on and off and it was instrumental in my working through my situation. Good lck on the driving shit too. Driving is a blast and super useful, and empowering.
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