I'm giving my ex a second chance after 6 months. We agreed

>>18013650
>how can I convince them that I've made a good decision?
How is anyone supposed to answer this? You haven't even told us what the fuck she did.
I'm guessing she cheated, but jumping to conclusions is never a good idea.

>>18013661
She didn't cheat. She had been in a long distance relationship when we met. She broke up with the other guy to date me, but since they had been friends before, they decided to go back to that.

He still had feelings for her, but she didn't want to believe it. Her trying to remain friends with him while dating me put alot of strain on the relationship. Eventually I got sick of it, and cut her off.

She contacted me last week and explained that I was right, and that what she had done wasn't fair. She wants a second chance where she can treat me better.

>>18013650
Depends on what you broke up for.

Cheating? No. Do not get back together with her. You'll still have that nagging voice mistrusting her because she betrayed your trust and that can never be repaired. That doesn't mean it won't work; its just not healthy.

Any other reason; depends on severity.

>>18013681
You come across as jealous then.
I've been the guy friend who's been blamed by boyfriends before.
I get the feeling, I really fucking do, especially if they've been with their GF before them. Its a huge twist to their pride and insecurities.

But ultimately; if she's someone you trust, there won't be anything to fear. There are guys who still have feelings but there are those who don't.

Hell my best friend is a girl and her boyfriend suspected me for so long until I eventually just cut past her talked to him about it.

>>18013687
I trust her now that the dust has settled and we've had a chance to discuss everything without the clouds of emotion that were present during the relationship. That's one of the things that she wants to work on, is effective communication.

But I'm not worried about any of that right now. If I decide after this taking it slow "trial period" that things could work between us, how can I show my friends and family that I'm not making the same mistakes again?

>>18013693
Who gives a shit what they think?
No one needs to justify their relationship.

If you've worked through your shit and feel ready, whats the problem? If you've mouthed off about her constantly then you've been kind of a dick.

>>18013650
People don't change, especially for other people. Why don't you worry about this question if it starts to get serious again?

>>18013697
I realize that I've been a dick. I regret it alot.

>>18013704
It's just something I've been considering. I know it's too early to be concerned about it.

>>18013707
You'll know what to say if and when the time comes. You don't know what to say now because you don't even know if she "changed" (people don't change, they grow and mature or they stagnate) so there's no evidence to take back anything you've said about her.

>>18013722
Very true. Have you had any similar experiences?

>>18013870
Sort of... Had a bad time with a relationship that went on for 5 years. Literally just ended it last week because she got content with piggy packing off my growth and prosperity while she stagnated. She had all that time to change and we were even together through it all. I'm not thinking of taking her back by any means but I do know what it's like to vent to your family and friends who hold some resentment towards the person. Tread lightly. Take it slow. Don't worry about ifs and when's because your cheating yourself out of what's unfolding before you. If it's meant to be it's meant to be but make sure youre decisive enough to make a rational decision. If you do that then it should be easy explaining everything to your family and friends. I hope it works out for you guys and the separation helped you both grow.

>>18013704
People absolutely do change. if you think a person is the same at 15 as they are at 25, then 30, etc, you're retarded

that said, change can be an active or a passive process OP. If someone is telling you they've changed, it may be worthwhile to look into it. worse case is she hasnt and you've lost nothing. best case, she has an you live ever happily after right?

>>18013933
That's what I'm thinking. I know that her state of mind has changed, and that she feels genuinely remorseful for the way that she treated me. What remains to be seen is whether or not she will fall back into familiar patterns.

>Saying she changed
>saying

Change is apparent through action alone.
Anyone that has to verbally declare it it either lying or not confident in the change themselves therefore has not changed.

This is the classic "i'm alone and want to feel loved again" rebound.

Honestly, you shouldn't take her back and the fact that you did says a lot about you.
Have fun with the extremely high chance of you breaking up again and wasting your time.

>>18014015
Good job reading the thread, bud