I just read the how did you meet your significant other thread

>>18006265
Improve yourself physically and personality wise. Ask guys out, put yourself out there.

>>18006267
I've already done all of that


I'm asking how to stop feeling depressed I'm exhausted from crying every day

>>18006265
It's ok, you didn't miss out on much. I am 26 and have been in six relationships since I was 18 or so. I regret all of them except for one; the rest were unnecessary heartbreak and I wish I could take them (and my time) back.

You will find someone, and in all honesty you'll probably never take them for granted having known loneliness as long as you have.

>>18006279
You at leasr have experiences to look back on

And you know youre wanted and loveable

Im just trash, no one will love me. It

>>18006282

>Im just trash, no one will love me.

So where's the problem. Start treating everyone like shit, it's not like you have anything to lose. That's what I do.

I know the feeling OP, when you never had a relationship before you can feel quite unwanted. I had my first real kiss at 19 and even then I didn't feel loved until I met someone who understood me.
What I'm trying to say is, the best you can do is hang in there, find joy in the little things you have and can do, get yourself out there. The best way to get through depression is not letting it eat you up, I know it's easier said then done, but that's what I've been doing and I hope it will help you too.
Whenever I think it's too much and I can't do it anymore I just think ''fuck it, why do I have to be miserable all the time? Why should I feel like this?''. And I don't say that half-hearted, I do feel very much in pain often, just don't let it get to you, don't let that feeling control you, rather use it to be creative and find yourself within that.
It sounds gay, but I wish it would help you.

>>18006274
>I'm asking how to stop feeling depressed I'm exhausted from crying every day
You're pathetic.
How are you still alive?

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>>18006265
>I'm worthless.
>How do I stop feeling depressed?

Found a hobby, something that will make you feel awesome.
i felt suicidal for many year feeling like shit, i discovered rockclimbing and now i climb 3 to 4 times a week feeling awesome and exausthed after. my body feel better, my mind is quiet when i climb and i even make some friends.

Moral : find a hobby, a real one
hope it will help you OP

>>18006322
I already have hobbies

>>18006265
I guarantee there have been men interested in you and you were not interested in them.

Your tears have no power here.

>>18006265
your not really missing much but you'll pursue this anyways, I did until I find out.


A question. why do you disregard yourself as a worthless and trash?

If its any constellation, I always see it as; god in his ultimate wisdom did not see it fit that we do this forever, and this is coming from a guy who doesn't always believe in him.

so cheer up kiddo. you'll die some day

Men are interested in the same two things woman are:
>Physique
-Activity level
-Hobbies
-Attractiveness
>Personality
-Morals/life goals
-Job/Education
-Happiness level
OP you should post your physique. You seem sad personality wise which is not very attractive. My advice is to be more optimistic and keep trying.

>>18006265
Go outside.

>>18006334
> why do you disregard yourself as a worthless and trash?

Because no one wanted me.

>>18006329
Thats just not true.

>>18006340
>>18006340
Objectively false.

>>18006346
Prove it

Ive never seen any proof of a guy wanting me in a romantic way

>>18006349
>>18006344
I know you're lying because every chick that comes here whining about not being able to met anyone is always talking about 'Chad'.

There are men who want you. YOU just don't want them. You don't have to date them, but you don't get to complain about being completely unwanted.

>>18006356
This.

>>18006356
If thats true then tell me where these guys are because I cant see them

Please tell me how to identify a guy who is interested in me

>>18006356
NOT op here but if a woman is waiting for the right guy you can't blame her for being upset if that same guy doesn't like her back. In my case I didn't date a lot of average women until the perfect girl showed up. It was worth the wait. I was really sad about not finding someone I actually was interested in. Now I am in a very intimate relationship and the wait was worth it.

Some people are not as strong willed and give up easier, OP. You might be one of them. The best advice I can give is to keep trying. Don't give up. Life is so wonderful and there are a plethora of wonderful men out there.

(On a real note if you've never had a BF at that age I am guessing you need to work on your physical traits.)

Get out. Enjoy life. Distract yourself from how lonely you are. That is what I did. It's not rocket science.

>>18006367
>Get out.
Do this.

>>18006356
This is literally the same advice I give you dudes in your threads about being lonely.

World is a big, big place. There's someone out there who passed you and thought "yeah, ok".

>>18006372
No.

>>18006367
Did you have to wait until you were 25?

Also Im not picmy an average or below average guy would be fine

>>18006366
Here's a big one: He talks to you when he isn't required to.

He hangs around or makes excuses to be near you.

You should probably also examine your own behavior to make sure you're putting out the vibes you mean to. No guy is stupid enough to ask out or try and get involved with a woman who is acting standoffish or bothered.

>>18006372
Maybe for some people, maybe even most. I know the signs when a woman is interested in me because it used to happen. Now it doesn't anymore, but instead of whining I just do my own thing. I'm not the one losing out here.


But I tell you what, OP, I bet if you went out to a busy, touristy place with a lot of dudes and just started smiling or making small talk with a few cute guys you'd get a date. And if not, you'll probably have some interesting conversations. I do it every month or so when I go shopping at Pike Place, and though I've never personally met any cute girls, I have enjoyed myself talking to interesting characters.

Give it a shot.

>>18006377
Let me ask something, are disgustingly ugly or fat? Maybe both?

>>18006377
What about you? Give yourself a honest look beyond your depression and tell us what you look like.

Also, if your depression is so deep it shows, it's less likely that someone would pursue you for anything. "Don't stick your dick in crazy" is an adage for a reason. Nobody wants someone else who'll be a drag to their lifes. I'm not saying that to put you down further, just that you realize that you should heal yourself first.

The secret is not to chase butterflies, it's to take care of your garden so that they'll come to you

>>18006265
OP - I want you to be brutally honest. Look at yourself, both physically and personality, and tell us what you can guess is putting the guys off.

You may or may not be right, but you have to see some things about you that others might not appreciate or understand the value of.

Your solution might be to change what can be changed, or just to package and present yourself so the things that put some men off can be seen as attractive.

>>18006377
I waited from the age of 16 to 2 months before my 24th birthday. I'm 6'2, from a good family, and above average looking. There were a ton of interested young women who were exceptional. However, they were not what I was waiting for. I went on plenty of first dates, even a couple second dates, but I did not see a future with any. I'm an honest, kind man. I am also a dork, a nerd, and anti-materialist. I want to be able to be happy and be me in a relationship.

Then came in my qt3.14 gf I have now out of pure chance. Took me a whole month of getting to know her before I realized I was falling for her. Did one of the most stupid(most intelligent?) things in my life and called her my girlfriend one day without technically asking. Could not figure out why I kept thinking about her 24/7 so I wrote it out on a piece of paper. She didn't believe I was infatuated with her until she read it, and then she said she would give me a shot.

Well.. its been 4 amazing months. I don't see this relationship going anywhere but toward us being life partners.

So, TLDR, yes. I did wait until I was 2 months before my 24th bday. Almost 25.

>>18006417
I dont think your situation applies to op at all

in fact your situation was average to good

Sad fat girl thread. Be less fat, try again.

>>18006425
Lmao I live in Seattle and fat girls here have 0 issues getting dates.

But there are also about 50,000 extra men in the state.

>>18006395
"No guy is stupid enough to get involved with a woman who is acting standoffish"
I am guessing this doesn't include "hard to get"
because my lovebug played me for a month. I think she purposely tried to act as uninterested as possible to see if I was genuinely going to be into her.
read >>18006417
dats me senpai.
>>18006424
Unless OP looks like a horse's ass, she has had contenders. People are lying and full of shit if they say nobody was into them. There are very rare exceptions to this rule.
>Homebody
>Shy
>Relationship-retard(as in she can't read what people like her/into her on even a friend-level. Let alone a relationship tier level)
>Obese

She won't even give us her weight/height/profession/education level. How are we supposed to give advice?

>>18006425
there's gotta be something more than that. I see fat girls dating.
I'm not saying it isn't that, could be, but I think there's more to that problem OPs having. maybe OP smells bad? or is obnoxiously loud? eh

>>18006438
>People are lying and full of shit if they say nobody was into them
Idk man, like I said, I know the signs, they just haven't been there for a few years. Pretty much around the time I graduated and lost 40 pounds, actually.

>>18006417
>I'm an honest, kind man. I am also a dork, a nerd, and anti-materialist. I want to be able to be happy and be me in a relationship.
Are you me anon?

>>18006441
She's probably a feminist.

>>18006448
maybe she is. heh
but being fat only doesn't say much. my best bud likes it a fuck lot. he hates skinny girls. there's a fair amount of people that actually like fatties. so there's gotta be a cornucopia of problems with OP that won't let dudes get close to her. hard to say without knowing OP.

>>18006447
Nope just good 'ol Whitey here. I am me and nobody else. Same as you.

>>18006457
The part I don't get is we have no idea what her hobbies are, no clue how she looks, no clue what her education/profession are, and she wants us to magically give advice? Bitch please.

>>18006457
As a man who likes big girls too, I see why so much people avoid them, they usually come with a lot of emotional baggage and turn out to:

1:Be extremely clingy and needy.
2:Be an emotional roller coaster because of low self-esteem.

>>18006471
>tfw like clingy girls

But hey, maybe I'm just desperate.

>>18006463
This reply was quite autistic anon, I was obviously joking.

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>>18006474
clingy is cute in like, extreme moderation. Everything loves being greeted warmly when they come home. The issue is when they start sperging out when you ever try to hang out with friends, or freak out if you talk to some gal from class about a project.

>>18006471
So much this. I'm a chubster fan and holy shit 90% of them have so many walls they built up and act surprised it gets old fast. I end up just dating slimmer gals half the time just because I don't want to punch myself trying to get to know them.

>>18006477
but, sir, I also was joking. Can we be autistic together?

>>18006474
Believe me, it gets exhausting pretty fast, no wonder why girls avoid inexperienced or autistic men.

>>18006395
>He talks to you when he isn't required to.

>He hangs around or makes excuses to be near you.

Hah! I haven't noticed any such behaviour

How do you make small talk with strangers? Strangers are usually with their friends/family/girlfriends/boyfriends, or if they're alone they don't look open to talk to a random person

What's your opening liner?

>>18006403
I'm pretty ugly, but I do the best I can with makeup

>>18006404
I'm below average.

>>18006405
I have an ugly face

My body isn't very feminine either, no curves even if I gain weight, I just have a square figure

>>18006417
Our lives are nothing alike

>>18006438
>Unless OP looks like a horse's ass, she has had contenders.

I guess I look like a horse's ass

>>18006465
I don't want you to give me advice on how to get a guy, I've already tried everything possible

I just want advice on how to stop being depressed

>>18006265
Cheer up
Just be yourself
Find something else to do with your time
If you want a relationship it means you don't deserve one

>>18006562
OP, if you seriously are not looking for how-to-get-a-man advice and what how-to-stop-being-depressed advice, here it is.

Stop defining your self-worth in terms of attractiveness to men.

Is there ANYTHING about you as a human being to be proud of? Then be proud of it, and define yourself in terms of it. Screw the world if they don't see your virtues/skills/qualities. As long as you see them you can feel good about yourself.

>>18006578
>Is there ANYTHING about you as a human being to be proud of?

No, I'm average at best at everything I do, I'm not talented in any way

A woman's value is her attractiveness, anyway.

>>18006562

I'd say you should post a picture of you or someone similar so that ee can evaluate. Depressed people aren't the best self-evaluators out there.

Most problems in life can be boiled down to two or three options. For your depressions, which apparently is related to your self image, you either:
-change yourself: get fit, have plastic surgery, new haircut, dress better, etc;
-change how you see yourself: accept who you are, see a shrink, etc;

Even if you're ugly as sin you can still get fit and be a butterface. But one of the things that push people away more than looks is being bad company, so if you're so depressed it shows in you actions and conversations, nobody is going to want you around unless you fix it

>>18006265
>>18006265
You dont op because you are missing something that's integral to life
Animals kill each other to be able to experience this, even in habitats where they could eat as much as they want and have no predators and could live into very old age they go and fight to death for it
That's how Important it is
And you never got to experience it
And you never will
And that means there is something wrong with you
Because everyone else can

>>18006580
For the love of God, please understand that I've done the best with my appearance, the only thing I haven't done is surgery

How do I stop crying every day and get rid of this emotional pain?

>>18006274
someone else won't solve this. the unfortunate thing with any kind of anxiety/depression related issue is that you are the only one with any power to stop it or change it. not someone else, not someTHING else, only you. after dealing with this shit for years I finally got put on pills to help deal with it and desu they don't really do anything anyways. first brand I tried made me completely numb to negative emotions which made me feel like a robot, second pill makes me feel like i dwell less on depressive shit, but its so constant that it doesn't matter how 'long' i spend thinking about it, it comes up too frequently.

ANYWAYS. YOU have to make YOURSELF happy. if you don't know how, then you haven't 'found yourself' yet. there are answers out there you just have to explore and live your life.

>>18006590
Like I said, it you can't change who you are physically, you need a shrink to accept it

And still, there's a whole broad of tastes that you can fit in, just here there's a ton of desperate guys that'd be with you.

>>18006590
Yes yes we understand now post one

>>18006562
>What's your opening liner?
"Hi"

>My body isn't very feminine either, no curves even if I gain weight, I just have a square figure

you sound like someone i know

>>18006721

It's pretty funny.

>>18006803
id say there should be a site for folks like this to meet up, but we all know op would reject any regular guy

the difference between depression and not depression is mostly what you do.
A word I used a lot when I was depressed was: Sorry.

Sorry for disturbing you, but could you hand me X from over there?
Sorry for beeing late.
Sorry for interrupting you
Sorry that I am so stressfull
Sorry that I am such a failure.

If you change what you say, you also change how you think, so make sure that what you says contains the part, where you are not sorry for beeing alive and where you are happy and have reasonable needs where it's also reasonable to state them.

Could you please give me X from over there? Thank you
Thank you for waiting for me
I think I have a valid point and don't want to be mean
Thanks that you adapt to my time shortage
Thanks for helping me and staying with me through highs and lows.

If you correct your language to say something positive, you will also start to think positive. I eman it's well known and researched, that negative things move us 5 times more than positive things, which means, you ahve to actively keep the balance.

About the not having a QT-BF, go to online dating sites/apps (okc and POF were my favorites), make a profile about you, read what people write you for one week, delete all messages that are one worded or inappropiate on the spot and block the profiles behind it, and message all others back after reading their profile and confirming that they are in the group of people you could see yourself with in the future (e.g. They are in college if you are aswell, ok groomed and have hobbies and no strong opposing political views) Delete all of them that seem to be players, ask fore nudes, drug addicts or poor/neet. Then go on dates and dont have sex on the first at least two dates.

i bet op isnt a virgin

You must have it real easy, getting all this advice and still being able to bitch and whine about how shit your life is. Being a victim must be very fulfilling.

>>18006265
I'm a guy, and can never find relationships; only sex. It's part of being in our 20's - not everybody knows what they want in life.

It sounds to me like you want a partner. The problem is by nature you end up meeting people who may have other things in mind. Often times, you have to be willing to learn from it and not hold grudges. Keep your head up. Those one night stands don't mean anything when they don't come back for more.

First you need to stop equating attention from men with your self-esteem. Some men can pick up on that and may find it unattractive (women feel the same about men who equate their self-worth to how often they're hit on). Second you need to find a way to healthily regulate your emotions (not with alcohol, food, tobacco, etc, been there done that and it gets worse if you leave it alone). You said you have hobbies - what are they? Do you have friends at said hobbies? Third, these posters are right. You aren't missing much. I've been in some stupid relationships with bad people, and one or two good ones too - but they're all over now, and I'm single and they're single. The point being that dating is a shit show the majority of the time. There are tons of factors which influence how dateable somebody is. The person interested in YOUR factors just hasn't shown up yet. Let them.

There is a guy out there somewhere for you, but he won't find you so long as you think of yourself as worthless. You know who you are - work towards a better you. Share the energy you want in a partner with everyone you meet, so people like your aura.

Is your emotional pain from your feelings about how attractive you are?

>>18006578
Also good advice.

Oh my fucking god. Grow a fucking pair of tits and get over yourself. If you're placing all your value on what men think of you, you're pretty much fucked. You can either sit in your pile of emotional vomit or get a fucking hobby, stop chasing after guys who only want to fuck.
You want a relationship. Don't go looking for Chads. Your sense of worth is not based on how much dick you suck. Youre more an a pair of tits. Stop treating yourself like you're any less. Jesus.
If you want attention post pics on tinder. Stop pitying yourself cause I doubt guys are into selfvictimizing pretty girls.

>>18006968
>You want a relationship. Don't go looking for Chads

All girls go looking for chads.

>>18006265
how fat are you?

>>18006968
>grow a pair of tits
>you're more than a pair of tits

>>18006265
OP, ask yourself, "what do I have going for me in my life?" Do you have a talent you're nurturing? Are you educated? Gainfully employed? There's more to life than just romance? Focus on your professional and personal self first. Then you'll never feel tied down to a guy, and that's a good thing. You'll never feel trapped, because you can support yourself.

>>18006993
Nice catch, m8.

>>18006982
The same way all men want Stacys, the reason men settle down for less is because Stacys are way out of the league of anyone who is not Chad or rich.

>>18006274
Lower your standards. It's not hard being a woman.

Post a pic of yourself if you want to know how you improve. If you're fat then I found your problem.

Im one of those who belong in /r9k/ and im turning 30 next year.

Ive dated some fat chicks but we didn't hit off. I lost my virginity to one of them but i still have like no sexual experience.

I know the loneliness, i often get skinhunger or start to fantisize about calling one of my old dates, but then i realize how bad of an idea that would be.

I spent 4 years talking to a girl online who was 17 at the time we started talking. We met once when she was 19. She lives in a different contry. I someyimes wonder why i do this to myself.

Now ive started to realize i might never have children and it saddens me.

I think i have social phobia, maybe you have that too OP. I have no problem being intimate with girls in private, but out in the public i get stiff and reserved. I've hit on girls outside maybe 2-5 times in my life. I dunno why i have a problem with this. I think im frightened of rejection and getting my bad self image confirmed, maybe also of getting accused of sexual harrasment.

>>18006265
Just keep looking.

Something to keep in mind, and this is purely anecdotal, is that most of the people who have trouble getting relationships do so because they can't casually interact with the opposite sex.

All of my girlfriends have been friends prior to dating, and it seems like most successful relationships begin in a similar fashion.

>inb4 no friends

Then start there and work your way up.

>>18006274
That's just life. It's brutal, but it's all we have. Believe me, those moments when you truly connect with someone make it all worth it.

>>18007325
I don't care if you're fat as long as you can blow me.

>>18007410
When you become an adult, get new friends becomes much harder.

Not op but most of my friends are from highscool or college and most of them are in relationships, a few are even married. There are a few awkward old single girls among them, i've tried my luck with them but they all said no in the end.

>>18006279
sounds like you have shit taste in girlfriends/boyfriends desu

>>18007439
I'm an adult and it's never been hard. You still have work and unless you work from home, it's hard not to meet new people. It's certainly different, but far from impossible.

>>18006274
Nobody likes crybabys. Be your own anchor, be confident and keep trying. If you're looking for somebody just so you can cling to them is the wrong way to do it

Heck I'm 27 and still hadn't had a proper gf yet, but being single has its advantages, especially when youre going out for the night

>>18007530
But you never connect with guys at work. I've been a consultant at this company since november. Im there 4 days a week and i still eat my lunch alone.. because what do i have in common with these 40 yr old bussiness guys and family men, nothing really.

>>18007702
That's a bad mindset. You talk with them, get to know them and maybe meet people through them.

Not every guy you meet has be husband material. Not even every boyfriend should be. Just enjoy relationships for what they are and let them surprise you.

>>18007530
Apart from work, where do people go to meet other people? Bars don't work for me since thats generally not the type of people I'm interested in. Where else?

Total autist here, so pardon my lack of understanding

>>18006265
>I wish a guy would have liked me enough to want to go out with me

Probably has been.
He just never made a move and neither did you.

>>18007726
Anywhere social really, volunteering places, group events, concerts, exercise/gym groups, you name it.

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This thread is still alive? fucking hell.

There's others that are much more serious than some pathetic worthless bitch like this.

Just because you have a pussy doesn't mean you deserve more attention than other people but that doesn't stop them. Disgusting.