hey adv, my gf just broke up with me and I'm pretty down.

So he grew up. Who cares. Most of us do. We all find motivation in different ways. Just because he told some bullshit story about trying for some ho, doesn't make it surreal or true for your situation. Grow up and move on.

>>18006199
story time dude. tell me yours and i'll tell you mine. literally think about my ex every day since she's left. it never goes away. i can't even sleep anymore.

>>18006219
Can only do a tl;dr now since I'm taking a test in 30 mins.
We met in 2011, she was 15, I was 16, were incredibly incredibly close, but both broken characters - she tried killing herself at age 12 by ODing, I had depression due to my dad being very very very sick and me bullied at school at age 5-14. we fought about the smallest shit but always got it together again, because we felt like we were meant for each other
(Cont)

>>18006230
so its your first relationship. and hers. and it probably hurts cause you both used eachother as a crutch through hard periods in your life.

it sucks. I was in the same situation. was a big shut in in highschool, started talking to a girl online, became really close friends, ended up flying out to see her when i was in grade 11 cause my mom was cool af about it all. kept dating her til I was just about done college and she dumped me.

we had been through rough points and shit but the point is this girl got me through my like teenage angsty high shcool years where i wasn't the cool kid or a jock or anything i just kinda coasted and did my shit and came home to ply mad vidya and talk to her all night. it's probably a similar situation to you. she was there for you and vice versa through your entire teenage experience and now you're being thrust into being a young adult but you're without her. so you kinda feel lost.

it'll pass. you're what, 21 now? 22? you're 4-5 years younger than me. you can still go to school and meet more girls, go to online dating, but desu you should probably spend some serious time on yourself and figuring out who you are m8.

I got broken up with by my second serious gf a month ago, i've been trying to figure myself out since she left and i just can't. i didn't know who i was before i met her and she was the only person to like put me on the right track but now she's gone kek

We were together for 9 months, then I went to america for school exchange for three weeks. Broke up with her afterwards because I couldn't stand the fighting anymore (plus her family situation - her parents are hardcore christian, I'm barely a christian). Her world collapsed after that, she started cutting herself, started smoking, it took her month not to cry every day anymore. Two years with no contact passed in which I pretty much realized that I need her and that she's the one girl I want to spend the rest of my life with

Going to reply to your message later and going to continue my story later, taking the test now. Wish me luck

>>18006264
gl my dude. i'll hopefully be here and not be asleep

>>18006241
It's EXACTLY like that, so what I'm feeling right now. Hardest part is accepting that the time is over. She's the reason why I am like I am right now.

>>18006600
yeah I know that feel all too well. it sucks. but you're still young and you've got a lot head of you especially if you're only 21/22. maybe it'll work out for you guys, maybe it won't. you hven't really said enough about what happened for anyone to gauge if you should try to fix things or not.

desu though it just sounds like you're trying to hold on to something that's very familiar, and if it's really this dysfunctional it honestly might be best to just let it go. try and ask yourself why you love her or why you feel attached. if all you can come up with is 'shes my buddy shes my friend she was there when no one else was' ask yourself if you could replace her with ANY OTHER FEMALE if you would have felt the same. if you actually loved HER that deeply, and she you, you'll know it after some reflection. chances are you just loved the IDEA of her, aka you loved having someone who 'loved' you.

The time may be over, the time may not be. the time may come again, only you know cause only you know the full details of the whole situation. but reflect on it and ask yourself some serious deep questions, analyze your relationship with her an talk to yourself about what you want, and if what you want is just companionship in general, or her.

I'm in the same boat atm, like I said most recent gf just broke up with me and I sit here every day analyzing everything and i just end up at the same point - i love her and i'm crazy about her but she wants to move on so i'm kinda stuck. have to somehow find a way to accept that she can be so ok with letting me go and do the same myself but I can't. rip.

Accepting this I guess is the hardest part about it. So do you miss your last girlfriend or the first girl you were together with? At this point I feel like you have moved on past the point where I am now, since you already had a second girlfriend while I'm stuck here suffering because I've just lost my first love. When you found that second girl, did you add that pine still miss your first girlfriend? Do you miss her now? I still need to continue telling my story, since this is by far not the end

By the way, sorry for not writing as much as you do, English is my first language and I also am on the drive back home.

>>18006760
*at that point, not add the pine lol

>>18006260
I then sent her a message over Facebook asking her how she was doing and if we could meet again to talk. She agreed and we met two or three times in which I've eventually confessed my love for her. She told me that there was too much between us and she didn't really know if she could ever be my girlfriend again, but we met several more times and eventually started dating again. This all lasted until she went to Africa in September 2015 for six months.

Commenting to remind myself to post later. School is a bitch. Keep your head up anon, I've been through almost the exact same thing as the greentext you're looking for.

>>18006760
I miss my last one. First serious girlfriend I went through literally the same shit as you. Met her when I was 13. She was a victim of abuse through her family. She was super depressed and emotionally unstable but I clung to her cause 'omg a pretty girl actually likes me' so I ignored all the bad adn told myself I loved her nd blah blah blah. Went on till I was 20 and she just kinda dropped me, moved on to someone else, shitty deal. Bad relationship. that's why reading your story I'm pretty biased in saying that it's probably toxic and probably healthy for both of you to go your separate ways. unless, like I said in an earlier post, there's more going on - but only you really know that. only you feel what your feely feels feel.

Recent girl was nothing like her though. Went into the relationship with all my walls up, was supposed to be just kind of a college fling, but I fell for her. the more I talked to her the more I realized she was so similar to me like how we think and what we want out of life. But that came crashing down to. Literally fight myself every moment of every day to not message her. I know that messaging her is probably worse, and I should just leave her alone and let her have her space, but I guess part of me just wants to know if shes hurting as bad as I am, if she's even thinking about me at all or if she's already all about some new guy.

I'm just bad at moving on. It's easier for me to move on if a girl tells me to my face 'it's completely over i'm sucking this guys dick now go fuck yourself' than to just be left wandering in my own mind thinking about the endless possibilities of life.

Alright OP, >>18006800 here, I hope you're still reading this. I honestly can't tell the difference between you and the other anons replying. Goes to show you that plenty of people go through or are going through the same shit.

So I'll start by telling you my story because, like I said, it's very similar to the greentext you're looking for. I met a girl when I was 21. She was 16, turning 17, but we hit it off very fast. After being friends for a few months, I started helping her through multiple different breakups and relationships. She had a poor track record of keeping up with guys and had a new boyfriend and breakup nearly every two or three months. Some were because the guy cheated, more were because she just fell out with the dude. Stuff happens, and I learned about her and helped her out with that.

A month before I turned 22 we decided to try each other out since we became so accustomed and close to each other. The following relationship was the best one either of us have ever had because we just got each other and knew how to make each other happy and deal with all the bullshit that happened.

But it didn't last. Four months in I made some relatively minor mistakes that triggered all of the familiar problems she had with her past relationships. In a single week she went from loving me unconditionally to falling out and completely forgetting who I was. The same thing that happened with all her past exes was happening to me. I couldn't convince her to try and fix things (even though we could) and we eventually broke up while I was still very much in love.

A lot of bullshit happened after that where we really didn't solve anything and just ended up making shit worse. So I immediately went into trying to fix myself so I could hopefully get back together with her.

>>18007032

To make a long story short, I did make myself better, but part of that involved learning that I didn't make all the mistakes. True, I did end up improving on myself A LOT but for her, it honestly didn't matter. There were several big and major mistakes that this girl made that I couldn't fix because they're all on her. Stuff I had offered to fix when we were in the process of breaking up that she didn't want to fix for whatever reason.

If you want to go into the stuff I improved on, a lot of it was just getting to know relationships better and my place in them. I believe I did plenty of things right when I was with her, but there were some things I did wrong and even more things I just didn't know about until after we broke up. I figured out how to approach problems and talk about issues and how to truly believe and see better things in a relationship.

Now much of that didn't matter because of this girl. However, where we differ is that I don't believe I've "surpassed" her. In fact, I'd like like to have a relationship with this girl. But I in no way "need her" right now. There may have been a point where I did, but I've since learned about relationships and believe I could do what we did with anyone. The truth in the matter is that I believe a relationship with this girl could be better than one with anyone else. Becoming better didn't make me feel better than her. But it made me realize I could DO better with her, if not just do better than her.

People move on in different ways, OP. The important thing is they move on. Digging your feet in and staying put won't get anyone anywhere. Maybe I won't get a second chance at this girl, maybe I will. What's important is I realized the truth of what we were was, and with that I could be better no matter which direction I choose to go.

>>18007032
yes, still reading and I appreciate all of your sympathy. what comes to my mind when reading your story is that she still was quite young when you guys started dating, wasn't she? the teenage years are important years of development, ESPECIALLY for girls. maybe she was just too young? Plus, if your mistakes were 'relatively minor', why didn't she just talk about that instead of breaking up? also, how didn't it matter that you improved? because she still wouldn't take you back?

>>18006991
yea, I know what you mean. But honestly dude, don't message her, not now. Wait, wait a month, wait another month. and when you've eventually stopped opening your chat every five minutes to see if she's online (that's what I do unfortunately), then it is the right moment to text her, because then you can think a lot more rational. Are you, by the way, sure that you'd be better off if she told you something like "I'm fucking Chad now, please never talk to me again"? because when you're as bad at moving on as I am, this will fuck you over for eternities.

>>18006991
regarding your first girlfriend.. I know it's toxic, but didn't you feel like you had met the girl you want to spend the rest of your days with when you were with her? And wasn't that breakup worse?