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>been together one year, known each other several
>amazing relationship
>both late twenties
>move in together
>both very happy
>partner starts feeling down for short periods then feeling better - totally normal, has been like this forever
>I panic, worry it's something deeper, start to overanalyse everything
>convinced myself the relationship is going to fail, they're going to hurt me, they don't love me
>distance myself, start to criticise everything, become a less likeable person
>self-fulfilling prophecy, will eventually cause them to dislike me anyway
>they say I'm perfect now other than this criticising and worrying all the time
What can I do? I'm in a state of anxiety all the time, overanalysing behaviour, convinced they're avoiding me, avoiding sex, searching for something better. It's clearly not the case but I can't stop.
This person is the best thing to happen to me, I love them dearly but my strive for perfection and no issues at all is ruining it. I feel like now something has gone wrong, it's destined to fail, where as before I felt like I could be with the person forever no matter what.
Halp /adv/
>>
meditate . if that doesn't work try takkng some hallucinogens.
you might be subconsciously afraid of commitment and te idea of being stuck with this person
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>>17993981
Tell her all of that so she could understand how you feel and how it affects your current behaviour.
You describe her as a good person, she will understand, and you coul talk clearly about all of that, and so avoing this anxiety of being paranoid.
>>
its nice and all that you blame yourself foremost but there are 2 ppl in the relationship
did the other person change, why dont you feel safe anymore?
what changed?
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>>17993985
We've discussed it, I've tried to explain how I feel but they're coming back with the fact they feel constantly criticised (which is true). Now it feels like there's a cloud over everything and it's ruined regardless. I can only see things getting worse because of the pressure.
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>>17993990
Oh, i understand. Maybe try to do a list of what is negative between us and what is positive ? Sounds stupid, but sometimes it helps to see if there is a real struggle.
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>>17993992
I don't think there is. I honestly think it's me being self destructive and trying to preserve myself, which isn't really conducive to a positive relationship.
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>>17994003
Then try having a time alone, with nothing to think about. Like just a week where you do what you want, no phone, no thing. And the ncome back and check if you feel better with yourself and your girlfriend.
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