How do I stop thinking about a grill I'm in love with /adv/?

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>>17991606
It'll go away.

I was in love with my supervisor once, like literally infatuated. Super-cool, cute tomboyish chick (pic related kinda looks like her). It was unique because I was actually attracted to her personality and not just her body. She was always kind to me and basically a bro. I crushed on her and hugged and kissed my body pillow at night imagining it was her.

Thing is was she was way out of my league and about six years older than me. This was a time when I was really socially impaired, too. I hadn't yet learned how to pretend to be cool and didn't even have the gut to ask her out. And she had a boyfriend. So basically unrequited love that drove me fucking insane and often left me crying myself to sleep.

Anyway after I heard she broke up with her boyfriend a few months later I attempted to ask her out on Facebook messenger and she gently told me she wasn't in the mood for a relationship, and that was the end of it. We still were kinda buddies, though, I guess.

So do basically the same thing I did. When the time is right, man up, let her know how you feel (or ask her out if her boyfriend leaves her), let her say no, cry yourself to sleep and move on.

>>17991652
Thanks for this post anon, everyone told me it'll go away but man it feels like shit but at the same time seeing her and thinking about her is the only thing that kind of makes me happy. The only thing I look forward to, if you will. My life is so shitty. ;_;

Some info about her:

>To get rejected I'd need to first have the balls to ask her out or even be capable of talking to her about anything non-work related.


>Petite (around 160cm), black hair, exotic, she's from an ex-soviet state in Central Asia and she has this completely different personality I fell in love with. She also doesn't wear make up which means she doesn't give much of a fuck about looking "good", she already knows she's a qt. She has a beautiful voice and she wears glasses sometimes.

>She has literally every trait I like on a girl. I think most of you guys here wouldn't even take a second look at her but I fell in love at first sight. I think I'm a weirdo when it comes to girls' taste.

>We do talk btw, it's not like I drop spaghetti everywhere when talking to girls, I'm not that autistic. I used to be but I improved in every aspect, the thing is I just never really talked to a girl before and I have zero life experience having been a shut in NEET for all my life pretty much until like a year ago when I decided to turn things around. We usually just talk about work related stuff, and she's nice to me but the fact she has a boyfriend already blocks me from getting anywhere.

>>17991663
You have to find something to get your mind busy. It's the only way, train yourself not to think about it. Eventually you'll meet someone new
It will go away with time.. It just take some. It can be long.

>>17991663
I feel for you, Anon. Sarah and I had a pretty similar relationship. However when she eventually left my work area and worked on other ones, the burning in my bosom faded a bit. Out of sight, out of mind I guess.

She quit only about a week ago, too, but honestly we didn't have much interaction other than our inside jokes. She's still on my work's secret group chat, though.

>>17991606

Meet more girls. Realize she is not the only one out there.

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>>17991701
>the burning in my bosom faded a bit. Out of sight, out of mind I guess.
That'd probably kill me right now, if I don't get to see her again but hey it's been only a month, maybe it'll fade away eventually. I'm trying to be as distant as possible.

>She's still on my work's secret group chat, though.
I actually had the balls to ask for her number and we talk by Whatsapp (most popular messaging app here in Europe) but I'm the only one that starts conversations and whatnot. I'm literally waiting for her to send me a message right now, to see if she cares at all lel, but honestly I think I might be waiting forever for that to happen.

>>17991705
If it were that easy, I do talk to other girls but eh, none of them interest me in the slightest.

>>17991712
>If it were that easy, I do talk to other girls but eh, none of them interest me in the slightest.

Listen, bub, we get people in your situation every day here. No one is pinning over a girl with a BF if he has other girls around. Sorry to be harsh, but it's true.

For some reason you fixated on this girl. Maybe she is accessible or whatever (after all, you see her everyday). But people that usually flirt and have female friends don't have "crushes". A "crush" is what you have when you don't have any real prospects around to date.

So instead of fixating on this particular girl, go out, meet girls, and realize she is no better or worse than them. She was just "near" enough for you to choose her.

I kinda wish I'd just have gotten rejected.
I don't know if I can give her up like that.

We started as online gaming buddies. I'd talk dirty to her all our fucked up fantasies and we enjoyed each others company for hours, we'd even tell each other 'I love you's' although the both of us knew rl was separate.

Around the same time she'd got a boyfriend I'd moved even further away from city to city over years, we talked just as friends on rare occasion and were happy for each others success.

Some time back she's single, we start flirting again, and we take it to the next level. She's flying out to see me and living out the fantasy and over time we're making plans for her to move out.

But, she's been sick, coughing for months. Last I heard she was in the hospital. I haven't heard from her in a week.

>>17991726

I take it you are not OP, right? Your case is tougher because she is sick, but in the end, it's your choice.

You can stick by her even though she doesn't seem to give you much emotional support back. Or you can move on. She is not your GF or wife. She doesn't depend on you. She made her life away.

Whatever you pick, it's your choice. Good luck.

>>17991729
OP here, nah. I suspect the cunt's just trying to troll the thread with a retarded story.

>>17991718
All of this is probably true. But, bub, I can't help thinking about her. I'll try talking to other girls though.

>>17991732
>I can't help thinking about her.

Just try meeting more girls. It's the best cure for crushes I have seen in my life. And meeting girls is not even asking them out. Just having female friends will solve the issue, you'll see.

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>>17991740
Okay, let's say I hypothetically have the balls to ask her out. How does one go about doing that? I've never done it. I'm not ignoring your advice by the way but it looks like you know what you're talking about so I'm asking you; how would I go about asking her out?

>>17991757

This specific girl? You don't ask her out. She has a boyfriend and she isn't that interested in talking with you. So leave this one alone.

>>17991757
Let's say she'll accept you. Then she is a whore that betrays her boyfriend and you are with her in the knowledge, that as soon as she isn't that content with you anymore she'll hop onto the nex dick who offers itself to her.
There's nothing for you to gain in this situation, get out.

Nigga I'm 25, chicks didn't even look at me until I was around 20. Had two hopeless crushes before that. You're so in love, you go crazy like one of those young puppies that try to fuck everything, only that you are fixated solely on her. I know it hurts, but this girl won't give you anything, so get away from her or at least keep yourself busy with other thinga until the love dies off

>>17991766
>>17991816
T-thanks man

>>17991606
When I figure it out I'll let you know.

Though mine is a bit different because she told me she likes me, but she does have a boyfriend. And I have to work with her so been about 3 months yet to get over it

>>17991850
That's such a huge step forward though. Did you ask her out yet?

>>17991875
Mines more complicated, she asked me out. Then her ex boyfriend came along and she ended up trying things with him again. Meanwhile seeing her all the time it's obvious we like each other. It's frankly very frustrating.

>>17991897
That's kinda shitty of her if I may say so

>>17991897
Adding on with some actual advice, I'd recommend telling her how you feel, or asking out another girl.

>>17991915
Yeah well we had only been dating for a week so it's understandable. But yeah she got a good amount of shit at work for that.

>>17991606
hah I come onto 4chan and someone has the exact same situation as me, expect we are both in classes. She doesn't like me judging by how we talk but even making eye contact with one time makes me feel a lot better. my classes are switching soon so my plan is that im going to ask her to block me on social media so its out of sight out of mind.

>>17991975
I think it'd be awkward as fuck to let her know I'm actually interested in her at all.

>>17991606
meet someone else legit works

>>17991975
Are you kidding, this is the land of unrequited love here.

Takes time man. Although, sometimes you literally need to stop yourself.

I used to like this chick, but we are both moving away from one another and possibly won't see one another ever again. What steams me is she gave other people a shot but not me. But I know once I'm out of boot camp, she'll want me, and I'll just either fuck her and leave and never look back, or reject her and find someone way better.

I liked her personality wise. Basically instantly matched, texted me and snapped me daily. Then it stopped. Being the retard I was, I kind of kept going. You just have to stop. I haven't talked to her in a month, and if we do speak, its simple "how's it going", a hug or handshake, then I drive off in the sunset. Just get fit, get social gains, and never look back. If you look back when she starts asking for you, its over. And when I mean ask for you, I mean like when its been a couple months and she wishes to enter your life as a serious relationship.

Just don't look back man. It hurts, but you'll be happy you never chased.

>>17993130
Should I just stop talking to her altogether?

>>17993398
Yes man. Take it from somebody who continued talking to her, didnt change much, learned more about her past that made me hate her to a degree, and now we are colder than ice.

Stop man, I know she'll like me once I finish boot camp because who doesnt like a fucking Marine.

Get away man.

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>>17991757
>How does one go about doing that?

Speaking from personal experience: The best way to ask a girl out on a date is to make it sound like you're NOT -ASKING- her but are telling her. Some examples

These are bad and will basically always fail.
"Wanna come with me to the movies?"
"Interested in going to Taco Bell?"
"Think you can come with me to the Post Office? We could go get breakfast afterwards."

These are good and are more definitive to get a solid Yes
"Are you hungry? I'm going to go to the Red Lobster when I get off work. Come with me"
"I'm gonna watch [specific movie] on Friday. It's supposed to be super good. Why not come with?"
"I want to go to the post office but I don't have a ride. Take me and i'll treat you to lunch."

If you haven't noticed the bottom ones work better because it's more like you're dragging her along rather than getting her approval. You're conveying that she is enhancing what you're doing, not making it. If those don't work then chances are that it's because she is simply not interested in you or what you do.

>>17993656
Thanks buddy, I might try those later on

>>17993656
>"Think you can come with me to the Post Office? We could go get breakfast afterwards."
kek