I just had a startling thought... Is my boyfriend lying to me

Sounds like he is lazy and going to get fired

If he was afraid of you finding out he was fired he'd be doing a better job of hiding it like actually going out etc

You should probably just ask him about it

>>17989262
>being so shit you get fired from a fast food restaurant

Get a better boyfriend

>>17989281
No, because I love him for other reasons. His motivation and conscientiousness is just really low.

>>17989289
>conscientiousness

damn girl that a mighty big word

>>17989289
>can't even hold down a job at a fast food restaurant

I'm not seeing any long time future here

>>17989298
You're probably making fun of me, but I was referring in particular to the big five personality trait model. Low conscientiousness on that scale predicts low GPA and low work ethic, but it doesn't correlate to intelligence. The point is, he's really fricking smart despite working at a fast food place.

>>17989305
My future with him is not dependent on whether he can financially support me or not. I'm not a feminist who is looking to support my partner, but if that's what it would take to be with him, I would do it.

He's in school. I don't see why him working at a fast food place is that big of a deal.

Anyways, it sounds like he might be lying.
It also sounds like he's irresponsible as fuck.

>>17989314
>The point is, he's really fricking smart despite working at a fast food place.

Who gives a shit? Intelligence means nothing if you don't apply yourself. For example, I agree poor grades doesn't mean a person is dumb but if they're refusing to apply themselves they might as well be dumb

>>17989314
>The point is, he's really fricking smart despite working at a fast food place.

i.e. He knows good weed smoking techniques

>>17989327
I'm not sure if he's refusing to apply himself... He also has mental issues and has to take medication, so that probably contributes to the lack of motivation.
Also, I give a shit. Anyways, what I'm worried about isn't that he's too irresponsible, but whether he's keeping something from me. The latter is much worse... Like another commenter suggested, though, I'll actually ask him.

>>17989331
No - he's in Mensa, was a state champion at chess, is the best (out of everyone I know) at Warhammer and strategy video games, knows how to program and also how the hardware works and has been fixing computers since high school (that used to be his job), and refines his anarchist views by arguing and debating with me.

>>17989262
The real problem here is the oversleeping. What causes it? Almost always the culprit is chronic sleep deprivation, more commonly known as staying up too late. Fix that and you fix him.

>>17989361
The staying up too late is caused by constant video games. I don't know how to fix that. Sometimes I tell him to stop being a faggot and go to sleep earlier in the night, but I usually reserve that for when he has a test or something. I don't want to control his life so much that I stop him from doing his favorite hobby - I used to try and it didn't work.

>>17989379
Oh I didn't realize it was his favorite hobby. Mine is watching football and eating tacos, but the missus still won't let me do it all night every night, maybe you could have a chat with her and explain to her how important hobbies are to hubbies?

>>17989419
Okay but what right do I have to tell him how to live his life as long as it doesn't hurt me? I guess it does, since I made a post about his job, which is affected by his oversleeping...
The point is, we don't even live together yet because not big enough paycheck to live without our respective parents. But if we did, why should I be the controlling wife who stops him from playing video games all day if I can fully support the rent? Because I wouldn't mind being the one fully paying the rent, since I want to live with him and will do what it takes. And in that situation, I would motivate him to get a job by never paying for his meals or getting him expensive gifts so that he makes his own moneys to support his hobbies.

>>17989357
He doesn't sound very smart if he would let whatever fucks his sleep up make him late for work.

Also, all of that shit you mentioned that doesn't correlate with intelligence: neither does chess playing ability or being mensa certified.

Tell him to lay off the video games and get a better diet to fix his poor sleep habits.

>>17989442
Why are you kids today in such a damn hurry to find a partner, to live together and to be 'supportive' by enabling problem behavior. One reason he is no applying himself might very well be that he knows no matter what he is getting some, and you will be paying his way. Maybe the most loving thing you can do is to take a break and allow him to grow up.

>>17989443
How does Mensa not correlate to intelligence? What are you using to measure intelligence other than IQ? Are you calling intelligence the ability to make correct life choices?

>>17989455
Yeah that entire line of thinking will always be bullshit to me. I will alter my actions toward him in order to curb his behavior once I figure out how to do that, but I will never break up with him in order to be "loving." That is beyond cruel.

>>17989456
I think I as we know it is our ability to learn. I think someone with a high IQ, regardless of whether or not they buy into that Mensa trash, would be exceptionally unintelligent to stagnate over warhammer and video games.

He needs a hobby. One that intelligent people would typically have.

>>17989479
Yeah, I doubt you would know any examples

>>17989494
Haha certainly not warhammer lol start from there

>>17989501
What the fucking hell is your problem with warhammer?

>>17989506
It's a kids game. And if he's "really good, better than anyone you know" he definitely isn't being mentally stimulated by it.

Why doesn't he fix computers anymore?

>>17989516
He didn't like the inconsistent hours at which he would be called in. Part of the job was answering emails and being on point all of the time so that he can go over to someone's place when they needed something fixed. He prefers doing something with a stable set of hours.

>>17989357
None of this signifies intelligence. Any can fix computers. Warhammer is not impressive

You sound like a grandma gushing about her average grandson

>>17989525
Fast food is shit for that too though. Any job that doesn't require a trade or degree is going to have shit schedules posted on the weekly. He may as well take something that he finds relative enjoyment (and if you ask me, fast food is just straight nasty)

>>17989536
>>17989531
It infuriates me that people respond with criticism and no positive examples of what intelligence is.
I knew a guy who got into Harvard and got 5s on all his AP tests and a 4.0, and who had read every philosophy work ever. Is that what you mean by impressive?
However, the intellectual curiosity with which my boyfriend approach the same philosophical ideas and his ability to understand and synthesize them is no less impressive, and I don't need surface-level accomplishments.

>>17989573
Calm down. Philosophy doesn't make a person intelligent either. Nor does ideology or religious belief or any of that shit. People just find it annoying when others brag about meta-accomplishments like scoring well on an IQ test or shitting on people in games.

To put it in the words of a film I hold near and dear to my heart:

Leap that wall if you're so great

>>17989314
>He's really smart in other areas
>just stupid in all the areas people use to judge intelligence


Multiple intelligence is a meme because "smart" people tend to excel in every area.

>>17989604
Does that mean you don't think there's an actual measure of intelligence and are just trolling with me because I'm bragging about these meta-accomplishments?

>>17989640
He's smart in the areas people use to measure intelligence. Whenever he actually does the homework in a class, he gets A's on exams and thus the classes... Most of his GPA consist of classes he failed because he just stopped trying.
Motivation and intelligence are not the same. It's just that the smart people whom we notice are usually those who have both.

>>17989643
I don't care how intelligence is measured. I think bragging about something you (he) aren't using is futile.

>>17989657
But why don't you think he's smart? That's what I want to know. Clearly you have a measurement in mind.

>>17989657
Btw, did you meet playing warhammer or did he get you into it?

>>17989665
I don't know if he's smart or not. I think losing a fast food job because you slept through it too often is an abysmally low place to be in life so I figured we could collaborate and help him. If he's actually smart, he's definitely got work to do.

>>17989666
He rambled to me about all of the lore and all of the stat lines until I had enough knowledge of it that I wanted to help him paint his army during a break from classes, which is when I go insane from having nothing to do.

>>17989674
That's pretty cool. Painting seems like the most fun part to me when I see guys doing it at my lgs.

Whether this person is intelligent may or not may be up for debate, I however think we can agree on the fact that this guy is indeed lazy, and irresponsible. As someone who has been measured by similar barometers as this guy, I don't find it particularly impressive when somebody, who seems to lack many of the fundamentals of encompassing intelligence is deemed smart by any entity. Coulda, shoulda, woulda, but this, if only that, in conclusion, is anything but.

I find it alarming to hear of the lack of regard for his own well-being, (dysfunctional sleeping schedule, addiction, laziness and general apathy in regards to having financial stability). It also goes to show you, indirectly of course, of his lack of regard for you and what you want, which derives from you wanting him to succeed.

Onto the question at hand, is/could this person be lying to you about their job situation?

Could be, could not be. Depending on how high he regards himself it would definitely be an ego hit, to try to explain, why somebody as smart as he, got fired from a fast food restaurant. I don't believe anybody here can tell you if he got fired or not, as we are not his manager, but one thing is for certain lethargic, tardy behaviour is not exactly the best way to keep one.

>>17989739
So would you have recommendations on how I encourage him to actually care about his own well-being at least? Or is this something I can't help?

>>17989649
Bull fucking shit.

Listen, I have spent my life around "intellectually gifted people" as determined by tests and what have you.

A lot of them are "smart but lazy" stereotypes, but they actually achieve shit. They just don't always achieve what people expect. Think the really smart kid who didn't go to college because he'd rather be a mechanic his whole life.

Your boyfriend on the other hand is achieving nothing and probably just another depressed loser.

>>17989765
He is depressed.
What does it say about me that I enjoy his company?

>>17989822
That you're just the average woman with maternal instincts.

>>17989852
Do you think that if I were smart, I would go look for something who's so clearly smarter than my current boyfriend?

>>17989262
why didn't you wake him up if he was going to be late? He might not have a job now because of you. I doubt he would lie though because it's not sustainable. He can't just keep telling you he was rescheduled indefinitely.

it's 2017 and you're not gay yet? boys are for boys and girls are for girls

>>17989327
Has it ever occurred to you that for some people, being able to have intelligent conversation with your partner is more important than money or a good job? One sign of intelligence is being able to determine what is good and bad yourself, not just accepting what society tells you is good or bad and doing whatever is socially acceptable.

>>17989877
>discussions about anarchy

Yeah, I'm sure there's high level thought going on there

>>17989573
You're not very smart yourself if you insist on arguing with idiots about the intelligence of someone they've never even met. Let insecure morons be morons.

>>17989888
respect the modern frycook-philosopher

>>17989859
Depends how long you've been together and whether or not he's actually trying to get better.

>>17989889
>Insecurity is putting someone in their place
A bit ironic, don't you think?