>take my gf to the movies yesterday >we have a great day,

bitch be cheatin

>>17981031
take your meds, help your mom get better, work out, eat healthy, get a nice schedule, send her a letter explaining some shit and well wishes even though you're not suppose to speak.

>we agree to not speak for one month, and to NOT involve other people under any circumstances.
Do you really believe on this?

>>17981080
^

>>17981080
Yes. She has said multiple times throughout the relationship she would never cheat, and women who cheat are whores. We made it explicitly clear and understood that during this "break" we'd still be in a serious relationship together, and when I said no one else should be involved, she said "NEVER" very strongly. She has given me multiple signs that I should trust her and, loving her, I can only take her word for it.

If one single month turns out to be too much and she can't hold herself, then maybe that love just isn't that real after all.

>>17981109
You're talking about a girl who broke up with you out of blue and in the same day said that she wasn't sure about it, how can you take a person like this seriously?!

>>17981120
hey man you don't know either of them well enough to really judge

>>17981109
if you can trust her then take this month to set your priorities. blood comes first so if your mom is in need of any attention you should let your gf know. also let her know about your newly found condition and ask her to support you in your time of need. imo if she can't be supportive now then this isn't worth salvaging and you're better off recovering on your own.

>>17981031
>NOT involve other people under any circumstances
ye honestly, with females, this generally doesnt work. guys are always, ALWAYS, going to be chasing pussy, and you ex is no exception

>>17981146
She knows. We had a conversation about it earlier this week, I told her I was now realizing exactly what's wrong and I hoped she'd be with me to see me getting better and being a better man in general. We had a good week. Then all this.

She's PMS'ing this week and has been all over the place, but she says this didn't affect her judgement.

>>17981146
>hey man you don't know either of them well enough to really judge.
I'm not really judging anyone, I just pointed out the obvious based on what op himself said, her words might not be concrete as he think.
>>17981154
Set your priorities straight, your health and your mother>your girlfriend, fix your shit up before worrying about it, and just for record, this was suposed to be the moment were she supports you and take care of you instead of creating unnecessary drama.

>>17981036
Checked, FpoastBPoast

>>17981031

I don't understand how someone can go a month without seeing the person they supposedly love, and by choice at that. Something is up man, there is more to it then just "you don't seem happy or satisfied" she is thinking selfishly too not just for your best interest.

You can give her the month and see where you're both at but if she's still hesitant or showing any signs of uncertainty I would just cut all ties, its not worth it.

She will get lonely during this month, likely talk to other guys for attention even if she doesn't plan on doing anything, you have to know that at least. But give her what she wants if you truly want to be with her, all you can do is trust her and see. Don't contact her at all, that would defeat the entire purpose of going without each other for a month, really show her what it will be like without you.

>I don't mean to use it as an excuse, but my mother was recently hospitalized and nearly lost body movement

what the fuck, if your gf seriously can't be understanding about this then she's a bitch and you should dump her ass, OP

>>17981031
So wait, you're sick, you're mom is very sick and you're naturally sad and your girlfriend suggests... to break up?
really?
this should be the moment where you could need her the most, it should be her responsibility to help you out not bother you even more

>>17982815
This
Same thing for friends. You find out who truly cares during your down moments

>>17981036
100% this

>>17982815
I have been thinking this as well... To make it worse, I waited this entire month for her to sleep over, and she was finally going to yesterday. I was very excited for it. Then, she waited for me to take her out and spend all my salary for the week on us, all the while making future plans with me, to then say she wanted to break up after the movie, and say she didn't want to sleep over (later changing her mind).

This absolutely destroyed me. It felt surreal as hell, like a nightmare. I got mad and told her she either had no idea what the fuck she was doing, or she orchestrated the greatest, most masterful plan to break me completely, and she started bawling and regretting her decision, apparently. I want to blame it on a PMS impulse but I don't really feel I'll have her back.

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>>17983076
Ex did almost exactly this last year, and I fell for it completely. She slept with someone the week before and then went off with him after breaking up with me, all the while sobbing and self-loathing like it wasn't what she was after anyway.

Granted, she's bipolar and was abusing drugs on top of being an insecure whore, but it was a number of things including dodging responsibilities and not wanting to have to deal with issues in my life.

Young women are unstable animals and if they feel they're responsible solely for your happiness they'll run for the hills.

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>GF: So, Anon. I know your family is going through a rough time, and you're feeling terrible, so I'm just going to bail on you until it blows over.
>Cuck OP: O-okay. Just don't cheat on me...
>GF: I promise :) *phone rings* Hold on I gotta take this call, it's Chad from work.
I'm assuming this is how the conversation went down.

>>17981031
This isn't your fault. Even if you've been down and distant, her response to that shouldn't be to dump you, but to talk about it with you like a grown-up. If there were problems in the relationship, she has a responsibility to raise those with you. The fact that she didn't is odd.

Is she mature, or slightly childish? I'd suggest writing her a litter outlining the fact that you acknowledge you've been unhappy/unsatisfied but that it's not her fault, and that she should have told you about this without breaking up. Taking a month break and not talking isn't a healthy way to deal with this, for either of you. If this sets a precedence, will she always do this in future when there's a problem? No. There's a good chance you should nip this in the bud, and find someone who's adult enough to cope with a relationship.

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>>17982977
OP is fucking blind.

100% what this dude 100%.

So now it is 300%.

DUMP HER, OP.

>>17984593
>Is she mature, or slightly childish?

She has a hard time controlling emotions... She's usually very explosive and I have a hard time asking any question that has even a slightly negative connotation because she takes it as a personal insult and it becomes an argument. She gets frustrated very easily.

In the day this happened, at the mall, the movie had ended and she was trying to buy some jeans. We went to three stores but none of the jeans were good or fit her properly, and she started getting actually, really sad and angry at the jeans. I wasn't saying anything, just walking around and waiting, until she said "STOP WALKING, YOU'RE DRIVING ME NUTS," then I went outside and waited on a bench rather than staying in the store. When she came out, it was like the world had ended already, and after that she wanted to break up.

>>17984652

I don't think it's you who has the issues, OP. I mean, you do with your family. But like... everyone else is well aware that she sounds more broken than you do.

I think breaking up is the right choice, now you can find someone who isn't emotionally retarded.

>>17984652
Yeah, this is the Anon you replied to there, she doesn't sound mature enough for a relationship. My advice would be to move on. You deserve better.

Think of it like this: your girlfriend notices you're down, upset, distant. She knows you have a lot going on in your life. She doesn't support you, though, but insists on having a break. It sounds like she's upset you're not giving her your full attention. Instead of being supportive and patient, she's made this all about her, and she's framed it as though it's your fault. This behaviour is, at best, completely immature oblivious to your needs. At worst, it's outright manipulative.

It's hard to say exactly what I'd do in your position, but it'd be something like this:

I'd send her a message explaining that I've had a lot going on in my life and that I thought she'd be supporting me. Instead her actions have caused me even more stress and worry at a bad time in my life. I'd suggest a meeting in real life to hash things out. Maybe she has things going on in her life too, maybe not all her needs were being met. She needs a chance to defend her actions. If she wanted to meet, I'd take the opportunity to hash things out and clear the air. If she seemed sorry and I thought she was genuinely going to change, then I'd suggest ending the 30 day thing and getting on with the relationship. Otherwise, I'd end it there. If she didn't want to meet to discuss things at all, I'd consider ending it then.

At the end of the day, things like this often boil down to communication. She needs to be more open with you, and it sounds like you may need to be more open with her. You can either work through this together, or end the relationship. There's no right or wrong answer, there's no guarantee she's cheating or not cheating or whatever else Anons have been saying. Only you will know how trustworthy she is. Only you can decide whether she's someone you want a long-term relationship with.

>>17984661
>>17984698
I just don't know what to do. I feel incredibly alone. I just lost my job as well. I don't wanna wait this one month. I just want her to be back and for things to be easy.

>>17981109
i broke up with my girlfriend und saturday.
on thursday I kissed my flatmate (basically cheating in the books of many).
It wasn't the only reason I broke up (distance was tearing us apart and also a few other problems).

its a 50/50 OP

I personnaly don't think she will come back

>>17984924
I know, mate. No one wants this kind of relationship shit. But the fact that, even with all the things you've got going on in your life right now, your gf thought NOW was the time to pull all this? That's not fair on you. You genuinely deserve better: someone who'll help you through this tough times, rather than making them worse.

The fact that you feel alone is worrying. Do you have any friend groups you can chill with? Even any old friends you haven't spoken to in a while?

I'd suggest taking this month to get back in contact with as many friends as you can. Use the time you'd have spent with your gf to have some good times with mates. Don't sit around thinking about her, get on with some other stuff.

Good luck!

>>17981109
>She has said multiple times throughout the relationship she would never cheat

All the girls say that, even the ones who cheat. Speaking from experience. Judge her by her actions, not by her word

>>17984924
>I want things to be easy
sounds like they were never easy with this girl

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> NOT involve other people under any circumstances
This is the wrong way to go. She will always think of you as the needy little bitch.

You have to convince her that you are better than her options. Give me her number. I will fuck her like you never could, and give her so many orgasms that she'll be begging for just the tip of my Adonis-like cock.

Then, when she's addicted to my fabulous Chad penis, I'll drop her for no reason at all. She'll be so devastated that, if you can catch her before she slits her wrists from the mere thought of not having the privilege of bouncing on my manly meat piston, she will have no other choice but to return to you.

It's a shitty thing to do, but I'd be willing to do it for a bro.

>>17985406
Jokes aside, she was the one adamant on not involving other people just as much as me, and she made sure to specify we were still a couple. I sensed she was also afraid I'd do something. This is partly why I trust her.

>>17984924

What you will miss most is how she loved you. But don't forget that how she loved you had so much to do with the person you are. It was a reflection of everything you gave to her, coming back to you. You might be thinking no one else will love you that way but it was you that taught her to love you. It was you that showed her how to feel. Don't be cruel to yourself and give credit to her for your warmth simply because you had felt it. Thinking it was her who gave you strength. wit. beauty. simply because she recognised it. As if you were already not these things before she met you. As if you did not remain all of these once she left.

Chin up bro.

>>17981031

first you have to convince yourself that you're happy. if you're not she wont want to eb with you/

>>17985971
That's a really nice comment, thank you very much.

It's so obvious she's just using you for her own pleasure, as soon as you lose your job and health she doesn't want to help you she just wants to leave you straight away, and the fact that she's even mentioning cheating means shes either thinking about it or doing it. Believe me I've been in relationships exactly like this and she is just using your wallet. In any case it looks like the relationship will fail anyway. Sack her as fast as possible so you can begin to sweep up your life and get your shit in order.

>>17987693
As I've said in the OP, I understand where she's coming from, I really do. I have been feeling irritated and unhappy and december was a bad month for us, because I felt like she took some choices which were questionable at best, and I spent most of the month alone. I know I can be an asshole sometimes.

However, after I got the blood test results last week and confirmed my suspicions and started taking the medicine, I was just so goddamn happy and feeling like things were only getting better, it wasn't even going though my mind that we'd break apart now. On the way to the movie I was the happiest I've been in a long, long time, and I feel like she led me on so hard talking about everything we'd do in the future.

And I feel like she just doesn't know what the fuck she wants. Two weeks ago she came to me saying she felt "used to" not trying very hard and wanted to change and be more caring and loving to me, then she did this for about a day and stopped. Then she was telling me about everything we'd do on her birthday, in four months, and a week later wanted to break up. I just feel lied to so hard.

She claims it's not the PMS, but how can any rational person act like this?

>>17981031
I would immediately dump her, OP.

You're going through a very bad moment, and it is immensely selfish of her to not take care of you right now, but to add stress to an already shitty moment in your life.

She doesn't love you or care about you. When you do, you don't leave their side when shit gets bad.

I know my boyfriend loves me because he was the one who held my hair when I was vomiting for chemo, because he was the one who helped me clean my grandma's bed sores, because he was supportive and loving through every shit day of my life.

A person who isn't able to stand by your side when you truly need it isn't a good life partner. Dump her.

>>17987705
Do you seriously want to be with this person who cares so little for you and who's emotions are so incoherent and confusing??? The rest of the relationship will be like this until the stress is too much and you both crack which will lead to months of self loathing and depression. Or you could leave her now, enjoy the single life where you answer to no one and when you're ready you can reenter the dating scene.

>>17981031
Believe me OP when you break up with her you'll feel like such a man. When you tell her you don't need her shit in your life anymore and she's not wanted it will fill you with self confidence and esteem. Tell her how little you care for her and then cast her into darkness where her only company is misery. To rid yourself of this parasite will remind yourself that you have control over your life and it is not controlled by some wishy-washy bint. Tell her right now that you never want to hear from her again and your happiness will increase tenfold.

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>>17987705
Saaaame here, I had a gf... She was cute, nice, intelligent. She loved me however she did not like my family, she was cold and did not show many feelings. I had numerous problems with my family. Disease in my family, Parents had problems with each other... However they always supported and loved me, and were sayin that she is not the one for me. I could not agree with them, cause i was blinded cause she was my first love. My ex statarted hating my mother, my father start ignoring her because she was all focused on herself. She always talked shit about visits in my home to her friend. Then we broke up, I did not know what to do. I told her she is cold and i am just asking for feelings and understanding. She came back after month. She was cute lovely, and full of feelings for some time... Then she became cold again, had shit loads of problem with regards to my character and the way I behave, even though I changed alot for her and was doing everything to make her happy. We broke up 5 months ago, because I asked her to love me again... Been broken inside for the whole time, however I understood how unhealthy our relation was and how obsessed I was... Start working out, reading books and hanging out with ppl more. My confidence increased and starting to feel better then ever...
Lesson from that story... Just break up bro.