[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y ] [Search | | Home]

Okay, /adv/ - I'm in some kind of a weird situation here.

This is a blue board which means that it's for everybody (Safe For Work content only). If you see any adult content, please report it.

Thread replies: 15
Thread images: 4

File: 1402656629001.jpg (40KB, 316x311px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1402656629001.jpg
40KB, 316x311px
Okay, /adv/ - I'm in some kind of a weird situation here.

Two months ago this girl, age 19, started working at my place, I'm age 28. we're both students, almost all workers are (it's a cinema).

I showed her around, learned her the basics and stuff, she was a cute nice friendly girl, but nothing more. Thing is, over the weeks I felt like we're going pretty well along each other, I talked more and more to her when we didn't have guests coming in. We went to a movie together after work, I added her on facebook, where I finally realized that she answers a lot to my pretty short texts, and has a real real open friendly demeanor that seems more like just friendlyness.

So I invited her for Netflix last night, she came over, and of course at some point we started cuddling, later making out, no sex but she rode me a lot with her pants on and got even off from it I think.

It was really nice, because I had some short flings over the last months but never some girl that really seemed to be into me emotionally also, and not just sexually. She was really cuddly, it was nice to watch a movie for once and not feel alone, but to feel someone cuddling against you, warmth, closeness.

Now it's the next morning and she wrote me stuff like

>Sorry to be honest and hurtful, but it feels like it's going too fast
>I feel like I'm not the right one for you, I'm too unexperienced and young
>It doesn't feel like we're 100% right for each other in general
>I hope we can still be on good terms and everything is fine between us

Not that I'm totally crushed, I didn't fell in love with that girl or anything, at least so far. But it felt like I could on the long run. Now it's just..a shame, sad and a shame that it suddendly stops like that again, right when it seemed to start. Especially because I finally felt emotionally connected to someone and not just sexually.

Cont.
>>
File: 1409848952001.png (327KB, 499x500px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1409848952001.png
327KB, 499x500px
Pt. 2

That I felt like I found that one girl I looked for, I could watch movies with and cuddle, meet up at uni in free time and enjoy each others company, stuff like that.

Is there still hope? I know, I wont cling to some shred of hope, but it is interesting to know, so I can handle this situation right. Because if there's still a chance she might change her mind because of feelings or whatnot, I don't want to mess this up.

So, how I handle this? Be friendly to her like always? Ignore her more or less, so she will get more interested? Talk to her openly about feelings? I really don't know.

It always seems like I can attract girls, but not hold onto them.
>>
I think you should have avoided going to fast, now she probably feels easy and all that crap women feel.

Just tell her everything is fine, and man, there are more women in the world for gods sake, don't get fixated on only one.
>>
>Be friendly to her like always?
Yes
>Ignore her more or less, so she will get more interested?
She will probably notice and you will look like a kid
>Talk to her openly about feelings?
Don't even think about doing this
>>
>>17945581

You're 28, just brush it off and say to her that it's no problem and you just enjoyed spending time with her, nothing will change between you and you're still on good terms. Then go back to being friendly when you see her but don't invite her out to do stuff anymore unless she initiates.

She let you down pretty easy, make it easy on her too by being agreeable and nice about it, telling her how you feel or any of that shit will just stress her out further and make things awkward.
>>
Be friendly to her but just leave it at that for a while.
If you're still hung up about her after a few months you can try giving it another shot but you're probably best just moving on to someone else.
>>
>>17945621
>>17945620
>>17945599
>>17945602


That's pretty sound advice. I try to play it cool and friendly, like I treated her before our night yesterday.

I'm not too hung up or heads over into her. It's just a shame. It felt like I finally found what I was looking for, a girl I can start something with, I can build up something..that might turn into a relationship one day. Maybe I'm just emotionally deprived because my last flings and dates were mostly sex and emotional distant cuddling, and this girl yesterday night felt like..Idk close. Emotionally also.

It's more this feeling you'd have as a child when you're supposed to go to a theme park on the weekend and you're all hyped up and in the end it rains the whole weekend. You know that this is not the end of the world, and you'll go on another weekend, but for the moment it feels weirdly crushing on your soul.

So I'm not clinging, or be angry at her. It is just kinda sad that it turned out like that so fast after yesterday. Also like I said, if there might be another chance, I don't wanna fuck it up, so I needed you to get me straight, thanks /adv/
>>
Short heads-up.

She wrote me another message going:

"I just need more time. It's just like I'm not really liking myself at the moment. If you start something new you should feel good about yourself to enjoy it fully and be happy. Thanks for not being upset with me."

Is she trying to end it in some easy way here or means "I need more time" just really that there might be another chance and I just have to be patient?
>>
>>17945644
That's seems like it's just another way of saying "it's not you, it's me". I think she's ending it.
>>
>>17945644

There's really no way to tell what she is thinking exactly, she could be trying to let you down easy and with the least amount of future awkwardness, or she could be telling the truth and might want to start dating you at a later time.

Just continue being a laid back, approachable, happy person and you might get another shot with her. Respond to her in a happy manner telling her everything is perfectly fine and be understanding. And then don't bring anything about you guys up again unless she does so first, just go back to how things were before you guys became intimate. She will appreciate that you didn't make a big deal of things and that it didn't affect you and your friendship with her.
>>
File: 1404887104001.jpg (46KB, 636x449px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1404887104001.jpg
46KB, 636x449px
>>17945651

Might be. What a shame. I won't get my hopes up too much, but maybe, just maybe >>17945660 is also right.

>>17945660

I hope it is the second, but yeah, I won't cling too much onto a small shard of hope. I did this stuff again and again, and at least I start to learn from this and can handle it better and better.

Your advice sounds really good. I try to be cool about it, I will treat her as open, warm, friendly and nicely as I did before yesterday - I guess this might even has been why she fell for me - and handle it appropriately.

Thank you guys. I'm still a bit upset, and I wont think it will turn out good for me, but at least I can handle it well enough with her now, and maybe, just maybe, I'm lucky once in my life. Because she's pretty cute, and I really like to cuddle with her again. Sweet girl. Real shame about it.
>>
Well done op, you did better than me.
Me 26, her 17. Worked for a week and felt instant affinity. After months of chatting and flirting, we had sex. It was too soon and she backed out saying she doesn't have feelings for me. I went fucking crazy and depressed. After a couple of months of self deprecation, I had to give up and basically screwed any chances I had.

Just stay close to her as a friend, let her feel secure and protected. She trusts you, don't screw up
>>
>>17945581
You didn't go far enough, number one rookie mistake. If you had sex the message likely would have been an invitation for more.
>>
It's because you're 28 and you work the same job as her. I'm not joking. This is the reason. Men are supposed to be providers, protectors - figures in women's lives that they can respect and look up to. You're essentially a peer to her despite having a nearly decade head start. She woke up the next day and realised what a loser you really are and is now full of regret.
>>
>>17945954
>>17945955

This is the most redpilled bullshit I've read so far today.
Thread posts: 15
Thread images: 4


[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y] [Search | Top | Home]
Please support this website by donating Bitcoins to 16mKtbZiwW52BLkibtCr8jUg2KVUMTxVQ5
If a post contains copyrighted or illegal content, please click on that post's [Report] button and fill out a post removal request
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from that site. This means that 4Archive shows an archive of their content. If you need information for a Poster - contact them.