How do I (man) deal with heartbreak in a healthy manner? I've

1. Alcohol and Women binging
2. Suicidal Attempt
3. Self improvement

Works every time

>>17933610

I don't want to kill myself.

>>17933615
Then skip phase 2 and go to 3

3 is gym, diet, hobby, friends, journaling, goals

>>17933618

I appreciate the serious response.

I already do gym + diet. I moved to a new city recently and don't know how to make friends (recently finished uni). Any suggestions?

I guess one of my goals is to learn a new language. I always wanted to learn German. Maybe I'll try it out.

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Well, I broke up with my 2 year fincee and never been downy about it, only happier and happier since breakup day. But she was a shitty person. I can describe how it went for me though.

1. Realize that self-respect, dignity are more important than love or care - they really are
2. Accept that you loved her and that was a great and life enriching feeling for you but the person was not worth it
3. Find friends or family to speak open about it and how you feel, feel free to complain, laugh at it or whatever, you van even blogpost here if you need to, we will comment on it, I did it as well frequently back then
4. Keep your internal dialogues spinning this way, the more you talk it through internally and externally the more you will find that there is not much more left to say or feel about this, then you will stop giving a fuck. Just don't suppress it and don't hold it in.

If she was a real bitch, go also for red pill, it's great way to direct your rage to something productive.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEHSRgwvbcI

>>17933651

She wasn't a bitch and I hold no ill will towards her. I just wanted her way more than she wanted me. I wish she was a bitch I could hate so I could get over this quicker.

You're right, though. I need to find a way to express myself. I've barricaded myself in my room since it happened and every minute is hell.

>>17933664
>I just wanted her way more than she wanted me.

How exactly? Friendzoned? Too needy and sticky so she got sick of you? Too beta for a macho-hunter?

>>17933607
Take some time to just let yourself be sad. Cry, mope, do whatever you do when you're really fucking sad.
Think about why you're sad. Obviously, it's because of hearbreak, but why did your heart break? Is it because you won't have a relationship, or because you won't have her? If it's the former, then you don't need to worry because you can find a relationship elsewhere.
If it's the latter, then there's not much you can do. Accept that it sucks, but people have their differences and for whichever reason she felt that the differences between you and herself were too important to ignore in the context of a romantic relationship. That's just how it is.
Once you have that in your mind, you need to cut her out of your life. Try your best to not think about her, though this might be difficult at times. She doesn't have feelings for you, and it'll just be uncomfortable for the both of you to be constantly reminded of that (sorry). It could take weeks, months, even years, but you'll feel better for it in the end.
Lastly, focus on yourself. It doesn't matter what she's doing anymore. What are you doing? What did you do? What could you have done differently? What will you do differently next time? What's in the past has already happened and can't be changed, so you need to focus on the future, but never in terms of her. Think about your own future, both immediate and distant. How will you make tomorrow better? The day after that? And the day after that? For the first while it'll be day-to-day, but it'll get easier

Hope that helps

>>17933607
I hate this pic, she left her heart behind, he just lost a part of his body that he can seemingly regenerate

>>17933625
Here's a motivation for you to learn German. I will write down how to deal with heartbreak in an healthy manner and you won't be able to understand it, unless you master German.

Jemanden vergessen zu wollen und negative Gefühle zu ignorieren bringt nichts. Auch Monate nachdem ihr nicht mehr zusammen seid und du auf einmal durch eine zufällige Assoziation mit Gefühlen überrascht wirst, sollst du sie zulassen. Nur so lernst du etwas und wächst aus der Erfahrung. Stell dir vor, wie du der Person gegenüber in ein paar Monaten auftreten würdest, auf der Strasse. Würdest du sie ignorieren oder lachend auf sie zugehen, hallo sagen und ein paar Worte wechseln? Wenn du zum Zweiten fähig bist, weisst du, dass du niemanden Anderen brauchst, um glücklich zu sein.

If you saved this post, how long did it take you to master German? Today is the 8th January, 2017.

You have to passato through the vive phases. Starting from denial and then reaching acceptance. Only then you shall be free

Dealing with this too, OP. The hardest part is the fucking waiting, man. A lot of good advice in this thread, accepting it and moving forward with self-improvement really are the best things you can do. But it still takes time to heal wounds and waiting for that time to pass fucking sucks.

My girl didn't give me a hard "no," just told me she wasn't interested in a relationship right now. Gives me some false hope that I can win her back, which is making the process take longer. But even if I could get her back, no reason to date someone that doesn't respect me enough to pay attention to how I feel when she just stops talking to me.

I've dealt with intense heartbreak last year, OP. Here is how I healed.

>Be strong.
Be a man. You're allowed to grieve for thirty minutes. Lay down with your face in a pillow. Just let it all out. After thirty minutes, back to business.

Do some pushups, play guitar, push your energy into positive release.

Go full no contact with the person who broke your heart. Never contact her, unfollow her on social media if you have to.

Improve yourself. Get a nice undercut, buy some nice clothes, get a new pair of boots. Become the most attractive version of yourself, this is necessary.

Don't masturbate too much, although getting off to some hot lesbian porn can be a good way to cleanse your sexual palette if you feel a sexual attachment to this girl still. Don't go overboard, though.


Basically deal with your feelings. Don't suppress them, it hinders the healing process. You're gonna have good days and bad days, but you gotta keep moving forward.

Heartbreak can be an extremely positive turn in your life. Sometimes our defeats are our biggest learning experiences.

>>17934076
>If you saved this post, how long did it take you to master German? Today is the 8th January, 2017.

Same day.

Just chucked it into google translate.

>>17933674
Any advice for all three situations?

>>17933685
Or... a part of him left (her) leaving him feeling exposed and vulnerable. Unable to defend his most cherished possession. Broken and afraid, exposed for all to see in his darkest moment.

Good luck, I'm on year 4. I guess I just have a complex, but I think it's probably just different for everyone.

>>17933651
>fiancee

what happened famalam?

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I'm in a kinda similar situation but not quite. To make things short, I haven't had a relationship in years then I mustered my courage and did online dating (it's not that I'm shy or can't deal with women), met a woman who I liked as much as she liked me but who had in many ways a troubled past. I was insecure on some aspects of the relationship at first but she grew on me and in some areas my insecurity also grew, unfortunately.

So, at some point I realized she was distant and cold towards me (which is her way to deal with stuff going on for herself) and it was an on/off thing. We talked about it when it couldn't be ignored any longer and after that it was fine for while until it started again. The situation changed back and forth from being great and fun to being awkward and her being unapproachable for me. To make this short, a few days back, after another of such episodes, she said she needs more room for herself and distance from me to deal with some stuff for herself and to see how she feels towards me, and we will talk once she feels ready to do so.

I stoped contacting her to give her that room, and wait until she comes to me. And so I wait for that day, unable to eat, work and sleep, because I miss her so much and I anticipate that she will break up. It's fucking horrible and I feel horrible. I move like an old person and I think of her all the time. Does someone knows a way to distract oneself in a situation like this? Or any general advice?

>>17935545
You don't deserve to be with someone who says that she needs to think about how she feels toward you. My boyfriend needs time and room a lot, but he never says that to me. He always assures me that he loves me and wants to be with me.
Either learn how to fill your time and completely forget about her until she gets back to you (after all, you don't even know if she's going to respond positively when she does contact you, if she does), or tell her that you need her to make up her mind.

>>17935556

I still hope we can get through it somehow, but the more I think about it the more I believe Im just not the guy she wants right now. She tends to be snappy and sometimes even hurtful towards me and I think she wants someone who stands his ground more than I can do right now, being so insecure because I don't get any security out of anything that is going on right now between the two of us. I just can deal with the prospect of finally found someone like her and losing her again after just a few months. It's a bigger deal for me as a man who doesn't have much dating experience. I know she had far more guys before and some longer relationships as well. I fear that she is faster to let things go and move on than I am who wants to work everything out to be able to stay together.

distract yourself from anything that reminds you of that person, do not go to places you used to hang out at or anything of the sort. get yourself immersed into healthy things, like the gym, working on yourself (bettering yourself), and just make sure you're not using other people as rebounds to fill the gap in because honestly, flings and emotionless relationships where one is invested and the other is not aren't good ways to bring yourself back up.

OR you could just get another person to distract from the person you're missing and have an emotional tampon at your disposal.

>>17933664
Best I found was the stoic approach in that you realise she was never yours but a person who joined your journey for a break period in life, left and you should be grateful for the good times you had with them.