ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

Question for guys

Why is it so hard for you to move on?

Not trying to sound like a cunt, but I've just read posts about guys still having feelings about a woman despite her being gone for years. I just find it fascinating I suppose.

Why is it that the most feminist of women who are very much into the body positivity and calling Beauty a social construct are the ones that are the most shallow when it comes to fucking men?

>>17925094
In my experience, best girl with the best body i've had, is still good fap material. Thus making her unforgettable

>>17925036
>admit feelings for a girl
>she says she cares for me a lot but has no romantic feelings
Did I fuck the friendship up?

Ask her out to see The movies on Saturday.
Says Sunday Potentially will let me know.
Cant make Sunday myself, so say 'we can go another time'

So it's a no, unless she suggests an alternate date. Am i right in thinking that.

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guys

yesterday my bf "jokingly" told me that i am sometimes mean to him and that i have a tendencie to "always wanting to be right"...
that really got to me. i asked him about specific situations but he didn't tell me. i asked what i would need to do different to not make him feel like that anymore and he said "nothing".
what now?
i feel like a horrible gf and i have nothing to work with to change this...

>>17925111
I am not a huge feminist, but I like the concept behind body positivity.
I was fat (190 lbs, 5'7") for a while, and being shamed because of my weight pushed me further and further in the "I am fat, I am sad because I'm fat, I eat because I'm sad" spiral.
In general I don't think that making fun of people for their weight is ever productive.
I obviously think that we should always promote a healthy lifestyle and the idea that "fat is healthy" is ridiculous, but fat people know they're fat and there is no point in making them feel like shit about it. You just make them feel excluded and like there is no way out.

On the other hand, I never managed to be attracted by a fat guy. Not even when I was fat. I just don't like it, and I cannot bring myself to like it. I rationally think it's great to be positive about self image, but on the other hand when it comes to attraction I can't really decide what I find attractive.

I never expected people to be attracted to me when I was fat. I knew I was unattractive and I was okay with it, I understood why guys approached my best friend and not me. But still.

>>17925245
Holy shit it's probably just something that only slightly bothers him, not in too much of a serious way. My boyfriend is a complete dick and asshole and I love him more for it, because it's hilarious. I point it out to him, but I don't want him to change. He probably meant it when he said that you don't have to do anything about it, and while he might get annoyed it sometimes, there is probably truth to the fact that he said it jokingly.

>>17925272
>In general I don't think that making fun of people for their weight is ever productive.
I agree with this but I also believe that things shouldn't go so far to the opposite where being fat is trying to be built up as something positive and beautiful. Being overweight is depressing and I know it's difficult to change, but it seems like people are giving up on changing how they look and want others to change what they find attractive.

I'm fine with overweight people. I don't find them attractive but I know they're just regular nice people, but I do really hate the fat activists that try to force and guilt people into finding fat attractive.

>>17925306
I think it should be more about self-acceptance than promoting obesity as something beautiful or healthy - for example I am fine with someone saying that a fat woman can be beautiful, I'm not fine with someone saying that obesity itself makes you beautiful.

The idea that everybody can feel good about themselves no matter the physical flaws they have, and you're not less of a person if you aren't a model is fine, in my opinion. The idea that it isn't necessary to strive to live healthy is silly. The idea that people should find you attractive and they are assholes if they don't is even worse.

Girls: I think the girl at a store near me likes me. She always smiles at me more than at most customers, engages me in conversation even if it's busy and gets really tongue tied when she talks to me. Would I be a dumbass if I asked her out?

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I'm a man asking this question for women:

What would best convince a woman to be in a friends with benefits relationship?

I don't want to feel secually lonely but also don't want the responsibility and constraints that come with having a gf. I was married for 9 years and have been with more than 20 women, so I know a thing or two about relationships, however all women either want a solid commitment, or only a one night stand. Can't convince someone for inbetween.

>>17925143
Not necessarily. It will depend on how you deal with that fact.
Most of the time the person who has feelings can't accept to just be friends anymore, even if they want to.

>>17925244
You can suggest another time too.

>>17925245
If he said you didn't need to change, it's probably that it's not a big deal. Don't worry about it.

>>17925312
You would be stupid not to.

>>17925321
Well I honestly feel like I can go back to how things were before without any issue, but from her perspective things must be strange. She now knows that I'm not just a male friend, but a guy who is attracted to her who wants to cuddle and sleep with her and all that stuff. It must be awkward to think about, I don't know how she'd treat me the same after realising this.

>>17925336
She already knew.

>>17925338
You're probably right. Thinking back on it there were a few hints that she didn't like me in that way but I was too inexperienced to realise it at the time. Oh well, it's a learning experience. Hopefully we can remain friends, I don't have very many.

>>17925094
>Why is it so hard for you to move on?

Because women have many more partner options than men, and finding someone else takes a lot of effort as opposed to just looking pretty and going to a bar like most women do.

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>>17925036
>Ex Gf left me because i threatened to break up with her a few times.
>Got really mad did things i regretted
>she got a new man
>I got a new woman, make out with her best friend the same day as acquiring said girl
>she texts me immediatly after i post picture of girl.
>don't respond and ignore her xmas and other attempts to talk to me
>she attempts to talk to me again and i ask her politely to stop because we're both happy
>goes into rage mode yelling at me and making up bullshit telling me to stay away from her friends
>best friend i made out with said she hasnt mentioned it in forever
Sorry for the long thing, but what does this mean? is she starting to miss me or some shit?
Don't want her back, but i don't know what it means either.

Is 2 years too soon to expect my boyfriend to follow my family's expectations?

At a function recently which I invited my boyfriend to, my oldest sister (who is a real drama queen) basically threw a tantrum like she often does. I know that it's just in his nature and he can't help it, but my boyfriend let a burst of laughter slip, he has a good poker face so I know seeing this sort of behaviour would be funny for him.

My sister pretty much lit him up, she went insane at him asking him who the hell he was to think he could be here laughing etc. And he just say there saying things like "that's reasonable", "are you 10 years old?" like pushing her to the edge.

I got angry at him as well then and so did my Dad. My boyfriend stood up and said "righto I'm off". He left and went to a bar where his friends were and to my knowledge (a friend of his posted a snapchat story I could see mt boyfriend in the background) he had a great time.

My sister is definitely a bitch I know BUT I feel like he could have just held his tongue.

>>17925472
No idea dude. She might just be a nut or jealous that things are going better with your new girl than they did when you were with her.

Either way, continue the no contact.

>>17925474
Did you ever explain to your bf that your sister has mental illness?

>>17925474
Honestly nothing wrong with what he did. If there was some drama queen doing shit I'd probably let a laugh or smirk slip and then bail out when the entire family then has a go at me too.

What are your "family expectations" exactly? To just sit by in silence and not acknowledge anything?

>>17925474
I have seen some really shitty families while dating girls, but if i cared about the girl i was able to control myself no matter how bad it got, and it's gotten pretty bad.
I'm not saying he doesn't care about you, but he should definetly know better, the laughter could be involuntary, but he could've handled it better than yelling back at her and leaving

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>>17925474
so the dude laughed (which could have been by accident, you dont know for sure) and i'd probably leave too if everyone started going mental.

>>17925475
yeah we were together for 2 years, she keeps saying she still cares about me but she knew it had to end and all that bullshit.
Think she's just having relationship withdrawals, pretty sure her periods around this time too.
Will do, cheers m80

>>17925474
He literally did nothing wrong here. Your bf sounds like a bro, your sister was a bitch and should know how to act in front of strangers.

What aresome signs a girl is super submissive, not just in bed but daily life. I was badly abused and arguments/nagging make me panic I want a more obedient girl

>>17925507
Date an Asian.

>>17925474
>sister has tantrums and does dramatic shit constantly
>your bf just once lets a laugh slip
>you and you whole family flipping out at bf about self control instead of at sister
Fuck you.

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>Been flirting with a girl through tinder, cute and nice
>Got her number. Flirted some more. Wants me to come over, has her own place.
>Checked out her facebook profile
>Most of her Tinder pics seem to be over 2 years old
>She seems quite fat in newer pics
>be me; skinny AF but OK looking, no sex for 2 yeras, into slim girls, but really want sweet girl to have good times with
>What do to do?
What would you guys do in my place? Also, any femanon perspectives would be appreciated.

>>17925526
Just fugg and keep looking.

Also, Tinder is a lost cause. Just talk to women irl.

>>17925526
>expecting anything from tindr but lies and vanity

>>17925474
Yeah, nah. I'm going to side with your boyfriend here. My grandfather is similar to your sister, and it's so dumb how people dance around their stupid tantrums. Yes, he could have held his tongue. I could also take a lot of abuse too. Does that mean I should, or would? He chose to enjoy his time off, you chose to work around your insane sister.

It could be a decade for all I care, I'd have nothing to do with a family as dumb as that.

>>17925507
Buy a Muslim wife (that's the usual way of marriage for them).

how come girls mostly paint their toenails only?

>>17925556
Because it needs less attention and work than fingernails.

>>17925507

Sexbots haven't been invented yet. Work on your shit and learn to deal with people.

>>17925556
I paint my toenails once every 2-3 weeks and if it gets ruined I can just wear socks and not care about it. When I put nailpolish on my fingernails I had to do it every 4-5 day and if it got ruined I looked very trashy and couldn't hide it.

>>17925566
Yep you know the struggle.

How do girls see a man who is utterly broken from a 15 year relationship betrayal? Its still fresh so at the moment i see no light for myself.

>>17925572
It is alright, don't worry about that. What is important is you as a person, with your personality and everything. It is ok to be bad after a breakup from a so long relationship. Don't worry about that.

>>17925572
It is perfectly fine to feel like shit after breaking up, and I wouldn't judge a guy for it, but I wouldn't date a guy who is still thinking of his ex.

Take some time to work on yourself.

>>17925532>>17925539

I must agree with you on the lost cause thing, it's a numbers game with awful odds for average guys like me. Must be good to be a 9/10 guy though. Think she might start about serious relationship etc. later on. Tinder is commonly used for dating in my country.

>>17925566
so what's the point? isn't makeup meant to be noiceable?

girls, how much of a turnoff or even a turnon would it be if you found out your boyfriend owned a gun?

>>17925594
No. It is meant to make you look better.

Painted nails look classy. If they're chipped they look trashy as fuck. Toenails are much less effort than fingernails because they last more time - sometimes I paint fingernails too, but I don't have time/drive to spend 45 minutes sitting not doing shit multiple times a week while the nail polish dries.
For example I don't like noticeable make up - I put a lot of effort into looking like my skin is naturally flawless and my cheekbones are really all over the place. I don't want people to know they aren't.

>>17925609
I don't care.
As long as he doesn't go around all day with the gun on him or has that cowboy attitude I don't give a fuck.

>>17925636
What ever you say sugar
*hat tip* *boot on barrel*

>>17925642
Kek.
I like you.

how to solve this conundrum

>be an interesting guy with lots of interests/skills
>be interesting to women but women try to tie you down
>only want sex from them

>>17925636
>go around all day with the gun
thats usually the point of having one you stupid fucking retard shit

>>17925702
I don't see the point of going around with a gun in the place I live. No one here does, not even criminals. There were 3 homicides in my town last year and they were all by stabbing.

I live in a very safe area (very low crime rates, police pretty much everywhere) and having a gun on you would be definitely excessive in public.
I can understand having them at home for your safety in case someone breaks in, collecting them, enjoying shooting or hunting, whatever. Not having a gun on you while we're out for dinner or at the movies.

What does it mean to be a "good kisser"? What makes a good kisser?

>>17925769
>Not having a gun on you while we're out for dinner or at the movies.
sounds like perfect places for mass shootings.

Girls

Silent treatment works really well on guys, does it work on you, too?

>>17925805
In the country I live in there hasn't been a mass shooting since the 60s.

>>17925826
I would dump immediately someone who did it to me.
I hate this kind of passive aggressive shit, if you have an issue talk.

I'm feeling really turned on at work, for some reason my clit is super sensitive. I want my boyfriend to fuck me when I get home. Would it be odd randomly telling him I'm feeling super sensitive, I'm really wet and I'm thinking about him?

>>17925826
Silent treatments are torture for both boys and girls, stop doing that please.

>>17925769
>There were 3 homicides in my town last year and they were all by stabbing.
hmm either get stabbed or shoot a bad guy, what to choose what to choose

>>17925891
No one stabs random people, unless you go in a crack house no one is going to stab you.
It's not like random people where killed while walking in the streets, it's like a drug dealer was stabbed while selling drugs to another drug dealer.
My town is really not all that scary. No need to have gun, no need to shoot bad guys.

>>17925877
>Silent treatments are torture
I think that's the point.

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>>17925905
>No one stabs random people
it happens just saying. maybe when your town experiences a 'population surge' thinks might change

Guys: Do you feel our boobs when hugging? They sometimes have scenes like that in anime where the guys blush and shit and I want to know if that's an exaggeration like usual or if it really is such a big deal.

>>17925915
We don't feel it any more than you do. Probably less.

>>17925872
no

it might get him hard too so he'll give you a good fucking

>>17925915
We do feel it but it's not like a sexual experience, it's an unavoidable yet common experience I never even thought about until your post.

>>17925926
>>17925940
Huh alright then, it's funny how in anime they put so much attention on small details like that. And not just on sexual stuff

>>17925945
Wow anime is exaggerated and unrealistic, who knew?

>>17925945
Well, boobs are a big deal to teenage boys.

>>17925948
everyone does... I just mean its interesting how they have tropes like that that are based on things youd normaly not think about

FOR FEMALES:

Whenever you see nice man ass, do you get the same urges as men when they see nice woman ass? To grope it, stick your face in it, eat it out, etc.?

This question's been buggin me all week.

Girls, would you date a person who was a billionare, but not that famous?

Rich people count too I guess.

>>17926050
Grab and slap and squeeze, yes.

Eat out...probably not. Although I've never tried.

>>17926068
No, I'd rather marry a man who was financially lesser than me. Not sure why, but I'd prefer that dynamic, having financial superiority.

>>17925803
Goes slowly, for me the most important quality. Doesn't have a lizard tongue and doesn't open his mouth like he's about to eat a burger.

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HOLY FUCK HELP ME OUT HERE!

>Little brother finally moved out of parent's house
>Parents live on the next street over from me
>They now come to ME for every little thing
>"Anon the toilet is clogged"
>"Anon this window is stuck and won't shut"
>"Anon we need you to watch the pets'
>"Anon we need you to refill the feeders"
>"Anon we need you to water the plants'
>"Anon we need help with laundry"

DAY AFTER FUCKING DAY, I love my parents, truly I do, but I can't keep leaving my house and going to theirs multiple times a day to help them now that they don't have my brother, my girlfriend is getting extremely annoyed by it, if I tell them I can't and that I'm busy they guilt trip the FUCK out of me

>"You'll wish you had helped more when we die"

I shit you not they've told me that before, it makes me feel like such shit that I rush over there to help with every little chore, I've used my lunch breaks at work to go help them around the house, they're NOT doing this to spend more time with me because when I rush over to help, they normally just leave and let me handle everything

The worst part is, they're both in their early 50s and completely capable of doing everything on their own, no health issues or handicaps or anything

How the fuck do I tell them enough is enough? I feel like this shit is ruining not only my life but my current relationship as well.

She was late to love me, but was it too late?

I was in a relationship with a younger girl, and helped build her up and shape her life for the better.

All of that aside, when we were first getting together, she was cheating on me, and hiding a relationship behind my back for the initial 1-2 years.

When I found out, I broke up with her, and she didn't show any remorse about it, so I pursued her again, we ended up hate fucking a lot, and I'm sure due to me crying or something we ended up trying a relationship again.

Well, it wasn't as bad this time, but I did catch her slipping up again, and talking to some guy privately long distance.

So, I handled that, I truly think she understands the damage she caused and wants to fix it, but I couldn't stand to look at her anymore. We rode the relationship down a downward spiral for another year before I called it off.

She truly means well now, but I just can't look at her the same. I wish she loved me when I loved her.

>>17926107
>How the fuck do I tell them enough is enough?

Pick a day in the week and visit them then religiously. You shouldn't miss more than a visit each month. They are lonely and want to see their sons. Invite your brother.

Then, then they call you, just say you are busy (it's true, you have a life). Eventually things should settle down. But keep visiting them, Anon.

How often should I visit my divorced parents?

I visit my dad regularly during the football season, we watch the game every sunday, and I'll usually end up buying weed off of him and smoking some with him when I'm there.

I visit my mom a couple times a month, and we always go out and get dinner.

Both know they can call me at any time for anything and I'll be there for them, usually car trouble or something.

Am I doing okay? Sometimes I feel like they need more attention, living alone and all.

Well, my mom more so, she's a hoarder with a bunch of cats that lives like shit.

I would like to ask to females which has girlfriend.

>Do you have an open relationship? Why?

It will follow a few questions more if replied.

>>17926258

Even for 4chan this reads "sleazy". Why would a dude care if lesbians are in an open relationship?

>>17926266
Because I recently got in the middle of one open lesbian relationship and although I know this goes with the person and the relationship, maybe other points of view will help me to understand this.

>Can provide context if needed

>>17925526
Could you repeat the question?

Can I get a bit of advice here?

I just went on vacation for a week and saw a bunch of friends and my ex which I try to stay on good terms with since she's a cool person.

We kinda hung around a lot and while she does have a Bf we got awful physical and stayed somewhere just short of fucking multiple times. After talking to her about it through that week we totally agreed we needed to stop doing that...and then we didn't kinda got a tad more intense actually.

It's kinda a complicated situation since we both still kinda care for each other yet are not in the circumstance to do so.

Wat do?

>>17926050
No. but I'm not really into man ass. I think they are effeminate and make me feel self conscious about my ass being smaller than his.

>>17926451
>make me feel self conscious about my ass being smaller than his.
shape and proportions are more important than size

Girls

To which type of guy would you do that excited wave where your arms are kinda flailing?

>>17925094
>Why is it so hard for you to move on?
Among other reasons, male friendship is very different from female friendship. When someone breaks up with a guy, they often don't have anyone to talk to about it because their SO was the person they talked to about it, whereas when someone breaks up with a girl, they usually have friends to talk to. Not to mention that for whatever reason, the majority of failed relationships are the girl breaking up with the guy, rather than the other way around. Men tend to lean in to relationships more. Among other reasons.

Myself, it also doesn't help matters that she was essentially my ideal partner and I have a hard time finding acceptable partners.

>>17925915
I've never understood those scenes.

>>17926479
What?

>>17926514
A girl I work with saw me and immediately did some kind of excited wave. Kinda hard to describe, but that kind of wave where her arms are out stretched and waving.

Just trying to figure her out

>>17926518
I guess it means she was excited to see you...?

>>17926531
Obviously, but she seems to do it only to me, and we have literally no contact outside of work.

She still seems to mildly flirt with me, but from what I remember, she has a bf

for girls

did i fuck things up? i feel really bad.

ok, so i've been talking to one of my coworkers for a few weeks. she's pretty chill, is usually fun to talk to, and we get along pretty well. anyway, yesterday i was in a really down mood and wasn't really talking to anyone or whatever.

so i'm standing in the back area by myself and she walks up to me and starts talking to me and i wasn't being very responsive, so she throws in "are you doing ok? you seem off today" and i just said "i'm fine, just tired", then a few min later she asked me again.

later in the shift she walked up to me again and asked, then i said i was alright, and she said "i can tell when people are lying" and then said "cus you're acting weird today, well weirder than normal" which really upset me so I just said "oh, sorry, I'll try to tone it down"

then the rest of the shift i tried avoiding her and didn't make eye contact with her because i was worried she'd bring it up again. I feel bad for ignoring her since she was acting concerned (sort of? i can't tell)

what should i do? I'm worried to bring it up and say "sorry for being weird the other day" since that'll just draw more attention to me feeling like shit lately. at the same time, i feel bad for being standoffish, especially if she actually was worried or anything. I mean, I don't want to bother anyone with my problems, especially since we're not in a relationship or anything, but at the same time I'm not a fan of being dishonest, so when she asked how i was doing it made things worse since i had to lie.

Guys

I just fapped and immediately regret it. What can I do to help these effects wear off???

Guys who want kids: how many do you want, and do you have a preference as to gender?

>>17926619
1-2
pref boys

>>17926619
1-2, maybe 3
At least 1 boy.

>>17926413
Gonna need more info, bruv.

For girls--

I've been at my current workplace 3 months and have yet to be initiated into the inner circle of people who hang out after their shift. Granted, I'm shy, and I'm definitely in better social standing than I was when I started, but it still stresses me out. The main thing is that there's a coworker I think is really cute and I want to get to know her. Should I take the initiative and start asking for people's numbers/kiks/whatever, or wait until I'm accepted?

I worry that I've already been shunned or that I've given the impression that I don't want to be friendly with my coworkers.

>>17926258
Bump

>>17926617

anyone pls

>>17926619
1-3. Either 1 girl, 1 girl and 1 boy, or 2 girls and 1 boy.

I'm gonna ask you guys.
Few days ago my bf told me that despite the fact that we were dating he still watch port sometimes but feel bad about it. I don't really know how to react. Any opinion about that ?

>>17926745

How do you feel about it?

From our side, it's pretty normal. Most men keep watching porn even while with a steady girlfriend. And it's also pretty common to feel bad about it.

If you guys are already talking about it, then just telling him "no problem" should defuse the situation quite nicely.

>>17926745
Is porn something to you?

If so, what is?

>>17926760
I'm not familiar with it, so I was surprised when he told me, I think I'm okay with that but it also feels a little awkward. I don't really understand these urges men have

>>17926745
Depends on the port anon.
If he watches 23, 25 and 80 he's just checking for e-mail, website browsing and listening for Telnet.
However you should worry if he watches port 25. Than he's waiting for secure shell.
Or even worse port 666. Than he's definitely paying Doom online

I am asking mainly to guys but any answer from people with the same issue are welcome regardless of gender, i am 25 and the only girls i see look underage or are 10+ years older then me, where can i meet people that are around my age? I dislike bars.

>>17926630
She was my gf in highschool before I had to let her go and move. When I hung around with her we pretty much embraced, kissed, and talked about how it's a fucked situation we are both in, but how we still kinda have some feelings for the other.

I just don't know if i should keep trying to be so close to her when she has a bf and a job and a life especially if I'm a state away from her most of the time...

Like shit anonymous, I'm a bit torn here and would like some outside input.

>>17926805

Parties from people your age. Classes.

>>17926619
3
2 boys and 1 grill. I don't think I could handle more than one grill, you want her to be a little grill forever so seeing her grow up would be hard.

>>17926818
>Parties from people your age

What?

>>17926844

You know, Birthdays, graduations, holidays, weddings, etc. Hang out with 20-somethings and get invited to their activities.

>>17926849
I understand

>>17925272
Okay that's great. But I mean that even under your circumstances, where it's okay to not be attracted to fat men, women often get extremely hostile and to men and seem to take pleasure in putting them down, even when they're not so hot themselves.

>>17926777
underrated post

>>17926768
Well, sometimes, if you have the use, you just want to. Like you could go out and run or whatever. But I think you have to make a difference between jacking off and watching porn as an habit. I don't know if I'm making a point

whoever reads this.

How would you feel about a normal person walking up to you and start a conversation?


Like how would you react.

Cringe?
Be glad he/she did that?

i've been trying to deny it for a while now, but i've finally come to realize that my friend doesn't value our friendship as much as i do

should i still ask her to hang out on occasion or is it best to just let the friendship end?

I finished uni a couple of months back. Is there something wrong with me if I don't want to look for a full time job? I work three casual jobs (cashier, receptionist, babysitter) right now and I'm pretty content with that. Since I live in Australia I don't have to pay back student loans until I earn a decent wage.

>>17926977
it happens a lot. knowing how much they value it is important, but that doesn't mean you have to end the friendship, just be realistic about what kind of friendship you're both looking for

How come whenever I become friends with a girl and hang out with her. She then realizes I just want to be friends, then stops talking to me?

Does this mean im not fun to hang out with?

>>17926972
What country is this? Regardless, it really depends on location. In a coffee shop reading? Don't disturb them. On a train next to you, looking around? maybe. at a time when they're not distracted in themselves would be ok? read the signals, don't keep talking if they look confused or uneasy

>>17927009
about half the time, she either isn't able to hang out or cancels on me the day of
i'm always the one asking her to hang out
the one time she asked me, she wasn't sure on what day she had available, and she never got back to me on it
back when i had a crush on her i didn't care, but now i'm not sure if it's worth it to keep in touch or not

i have told her that it feels like i'm putting a whole lot more effort into it than her, and she told me i'm really the only person she talks to outside of class, but i don't really believe it

>>17926972
I'd be glad, whoever it is.

>>17925094
generally it's perceived that guys have a harder time getting dates/relationships, while a woman can jump to the closest orbiter until the next guy rolls around. 100% bullshit but that's my best guess
>>17925244
if you cancel the date, it's your responsibility to suggest an alternate date
>>17925803
don't slobber/jam your tongue down their throat/have bad breath. go with what they do
>>17925915
kind of, but unless the hug was intended to be sexual, it's not a factor. dudes hug their moms/grammas all the time and it's not a big deal

>>17927015
Netherlands.
Yeah that makes sense.

I want to be more social and talk to people more i guess. I know from myself that im kinda shy, But i also from myself that i would it if people would come up to me

Today i also talked to some girl that was sitting in the same bus. Im glad i did it. She smiled alot n sutff

Only downside is that i couldnt really ask for her number since she was leaving at a random stop :/

>>17926972
If they dont come across as aggresive i would like it personally.

>>17927054
>>17927033
Thats good to hear, This makes me want to talk to people more

I miss this prostitute who moved to the other side of the city. Should I:
a) try to see if she lets me pass the night with her at her home;
b) go see her at the brothel (limited to 1 hour);
c) go to the nearer brothel and see the other favorite prostitute (I miss that one, though)?

>>17927067
That's a good attitude, even if some people look funny at you or ignore you dont let it bother you, as they say why put energy where it's being blocked.

>17927076
Thanks, ive saved ur comment. When it happens il look back at it ^^

>>17926107
Fuck you
>i wuv my parents truly
Lucky you have them you fat lazy cunt

>>17926619
7.
Straight, white, blonde, blue eyed boys over 6' tall, by age 12

>>17927121
aight that was me

>>17927012
bump

how do i initiate cuddling while watching a movie together with a girl

>>17927169
Crawl up to her.

When i had a girl over, i pretty much signed
(in a teasing way) to her to come lay next to me in my bed.

Sounds wierd but it worked smoothly

>>17927169

Does she like you? then just put your arm around her. She'll probably move closer. If she doesn't like you, though, sorry.

guy here

what would you suggest be the minimum standards before one starts dating? (if any?)

making a greater effort this year (hopefully) to finally get my shit together and some suggestions or ideas for goals would help.

>>17927196
well she agreed to watch a movie together with just me

do girls agree to do that when they don't like you? ...

The girl that I've liked, but barely spoken to, had a girlfriend for 4 years. They've broken up. Do I haev any chance at all? I'll meet her in a few weeks. Should I try? I really like her. Are women hopefully simply just more self secured about sexuality and thus dont hide a girlfriend if they happen to be bi-sexual?

>>17927210
Sometimes.

I found out my crush (guy - I am female) has been spending a lot of time with an ex girlfriend and I'm pretty disappointed. I tend to pin all my hopes on one person and I know that's not healthy, but I'm not sure how to avoid it.

What do guys think I should do in this situation? I had hoped to ask him out and was trying to build up the confidence to do so but now I feel like I'm chasing after someone who is essentially taken.

Why are girls so mean? I though they were supposed to be the more empathetic sex?

>>17927210

Depends. Maybe she doesn't realize you like her. So no guarantees there.

>>17927224
Thanks. Had to hear that. I know it probably won't work out but I need the courage to at least speak to her normally for some time. I've longed for this

>>17925036
Do women really masturbate in public using only their thigh/butt/vag/ab muscles?

>>17927204

Don't be obviously insane. Have at least two male friends and one female friend. Have hobbies and a job to occupy some of your time.

That's like the minimum to have enough emotional stability. After that, work on your strengths to be attractive enough.

I've been hanging out with this girl for about a month and I really like her, and pretty sure she's interested in me too. Are there any ways, conversationally, I can kind of gauge her interest or bring up the topic without it being weird or forced?

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Femanons:

How would you feel if your ex didn't text you on your birthday? You were the one who dumped him.

My ex of 4 years' birthday is this Saturday and I don't plan on texting her. We are on decent terms, but I stayed in relationship mode too long during the breakup and it pissed her off. I fixed my mistake by laughing it off when she brought it up, saying "live and learn" and went no contact. Didn't text her on any of the Holidays. I got a birthday text from her which was two months after the breakup.

I am in a place right now where I wouldn't be too upset if I never hear from her again, because no contact has done wonders.. but I do kind of hope that her not hearing from me on her birthday will make her miss me, or at least think about what I'm up to.

She's very sensitive and her birthday was always a huge event. We'd celebrate the entire month, basically. Random flowers, vacations, taking her out almost every night, etc. I always tried to make sure she enjoyed her birthdays as much as possible.

She's single at the moment. She was in a rebound relationship for a short while after we broke up (may 2016) and the last time we talked was at a party on Halloween. Her friend told me she was expecting me to chase her, but I just said "hey," smiled, and walked away to circulate the party.

To be honest I do want to work things out with her but I know I have to stay in no contact for that to be possible. I know texting her on her birthday would just boost her ego or make her roll her eyes, and at best I'd get a "thank you!" then never hear from her again. How would you feel if you didn't hear from your ex on your birthday?

Bump: >>17927075

>>17927242
Believe in yourself, brother. She agreed to hang out with you for a reason and unless she's made it explicitly clear she's not interested in you romantically you have no reason not to go for it.

>>17927254
If I still had lingering feelings for him, it would hurt. If I didn't, I wouldn't care one way or the other.

That said, you obviously don't owe her anything.

I'd personally advise you not do anything. Typically I'm against game playing and don't think that leads to a worthwhile relationship, but that thing about her expecting you to chase her just rubs me the wrong way. Don't give her anything that makes you think you're doing that. It's probably your best move no matter what you want the outcome to be.

I'm not really sure why you want things to work out with her anyway. Judging by your post alone, she sounds like a chore.

>>17927226

this applies to all girls who arent a fucking trainwreck of psychoses & bad habit

hang out with his social group so you get some face time, then continue with your plan to ask him out. normally.

there are two options: hes seriously considering going back to his ex, which marks him as a retard, or hes not, which means he is up for grabs. hang out, be cool, ask him out.

he will not be your last crush.


>>17927231
they're exactly as mean as guys, you just expect them to be more nice by comparison.

get a dog best friend & a human one for emotional support, not a girl. big turn off.

>>17927075
my professional recommendation is stop banging hookers or at least the same one so much you get attached
assuming you're as bad at doing the right thing as i am, you're going to ignore that, so my second piece of advice is: don't ever, ever try to date a hooker. go downtown to the other one. don't date a hooker.

fuck
human male best friend

>>17927272
We do hang out at a local gaming group, but I can't seem to move past that into his inner social circle.

There is one guy there that seems to have a bro crush on him and is always always hanging around him and does not seem to like me very much and seems to do whatever the female equivalent of a cock block is anytime I try to talk to him outside of games.

I don't know if he's necessarily retarded for going back to her. I don't know their story, but it sounds like they broke up because they're both ambitious people and she went away to pursue a career or education or something but their paths are converging again.

You're right, he won't be my last, but it does take me a while to find someone I have a connection with. This is the first new crush I've had in years, so it's hard to let it go.

>>17927222
How recent was that breakup? Sexuality aside, she's probably going to need some time to deal with the breakup. If she just got out of that relationship, chances are she won't be interested in dating anyone for a while.

I'd suggest trying to find out about her sexuality through mutual friends or social media, as some people openly express their sexuality on there. You can always try even if you're not sure but prepare yourself for dissapointment. And don't get desperate or think you can change her sexual preference if it turns out she's a lesbian.

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Is Ernest Hemingway attractive?

I'm female. I thought I was asexual for a long time but have begun to acknowledge that I have sexual and romantic feelings towards men. But now I'm afraid that I'm a walking red flag. How unappealing is this? Tell me straight.

>35 years old
>virgin
>never had a relationship
>cut myself as a teenager and in early 20s and still have very obvious scars (though on my shoulder, so shirts cover it)
>hospitalized twice for depression, one of which was not that long ago (when I was 33?)
>have trouble developing feelings, but can be very intense once they're there, i don't seem to get crushes exactly, i'm either infatuated or in love or i'm not. Dating doesn't seem to work for me, i have to know the person for a while first before i can be interested.

I'm screwed, huh?

I dated a girl for a little while and things broke off because I wanted a relationship and she was pretty fresh off a break up so she wasn't ready for one yet. Would it be a huge faux pas to ask her out in a couple months? We run in the same circles, so we should remain pretty friendly, but I basically told her I wouldn't bother her with relationship stuff again. This is probably a dumb question, but I'm stuck in that funk where I haven't gotten over her yet and can't imagine myself getting over her.

>>17927342
Eh, I think it's worth asking her once more. You can just be honest and admit you know you said you wouldn't bother her, but you still want to be with her.

But if she says no, that's it.

And in the meantime you should be working towards a place where you don't want to ask her out anyway.

I one time rejected a guy early on, only to grow to like him later on, but never said anything because I felt like I had messed up by not giving him enough of a chance. He liked me too but never said anything because he had already been rejected. If one of us had just stepped up, it's not unrealistic to say we'd be married right now.

>>17927349
you need to kill yourself and fuck off

>>17927358
Because I rejected a guy that I didn't like at the time?

He's dating someone much prettier now, so maybe I did him a favor.

>>17927349
Thanks, anon. That gives me some hope. Totally likely I'll be a in different place and have met someone else by then, but still good to feel like I might have a chance.

>>17927372
Not to be a bitch, but I didn't really mean to give you hope. It's still an unlikely outcome.

My anecdote was meant to illustrate more that you have almost nothing to lose but a lot to gain. What's the worst that happens? You get rejected and you hurt for a couple of months and then move on knowing full well it wasn't meant to be.

>>17927385
Appreciate the honesty. The wound is still fresh, so just scrounging for an excuse to feel better.

>>17927272
I wasn't clear, but I wouldn't date her. I'd try to negotiate a good price to spend the night with her instead of the usual just 1 hour at brothels.

>>17927340
You're a much bigger red flags than me.

>>17926558
anyone? I'm mostly wondering what to do next time i see her. Should I even bring it up? I know I shouldn't really worry too much about this since everyone has a bad day, but I'm hesitant to "open up" if that makes sense.

Like, my previous relationship was rocky to say the least and it's sort of turned me off of the whole being emotionally available thing.

What do? Should I just brush this over and act like I didn't flat out ignore her when she was just being nice, or just wait in case she brings it up?

>>17927414
Just apologize. Odds are, she's familiar with depression and bad moods and will understand. If she starts being pushy, just tell her you don't want to talk about it but you appreciate that she's there to talk.

>>17925609
A really huge turnon. And the idea of my boyfriend and I going shooting and watching one another doing it while imaging that we are killing other people gets us really horny.

>>17925826
It makes me want to kill myself when my boyfriend refuses to respond

How good is facebook at gauging someone's feelings? I'm a girl and I friended a guy I like who I've been getting mixed signals from (lately it seems more no than yes). I was hoping he'd like some of my photos or recent updates or something and be able to see that I'm single. I friended a friend of his at the same time too, hoping to not seem weird and desperate.

But he accepted the friend request and that's been it. It's been a few days.

Can I assume this is a sign I need to move on?

>>17927458
If someone friended me I'd think it'd be weird go back and like older stuff fwiw. If you really have to use fb to gauge this try making some new posts about something he would like (be subtle and make it seem like something you would genuinely post). But honestly, I would just talk to him, social media likes mean next to nothing 99% of the time for me.

>>17927472
Thanks, I reactivated facebook (in part to do this, which is shameful i know, but I also wanted to start using a job finding group) so all 2 or 3 of my recent statuses are brand new. his are all old, so i can't like any of them.

i guess i was just hoping he'd creep on me.

>>17925036

Girls, I just got my first two matches on Tinder (back to back, humorously enough).

I'm not really looking to bang, just get to know people and develop "dating skills" because I've never done it before.

How to I message them without seeming like a lame weirdo but also not some alpha dudebro looking to get wet?

>>17927427
is it bad if i'm scared to apologize? It's nothing but still drawing attention to my depression/anxiety which creeps up on me every now and then since I don't take meds or go to therapy anymore.

It sucks, she's the first girl in a while that I've even thought about being more open with but I can't bring myself to do it and I know I'm gonna end up shooting myself in the foot if I don't at least try...

>>17927493
Yeah, honestly just message him and try to talk with him I'd say. If he accepted your friend request he knows you right? If fb is your only avenue for communication and you like him, might as well give it a go.

>>17927517
No, I'd be afraid too. You can keep it vague. Just practice saying "hey, sorry about the other day"

There is absolutely no chance she's going to be a dick about it. She cared enough to reach out to you.

>>17927549
We're in a study group, so I have his number, but I feel like it would be wrong to use a number he didn't give me voluntarily to hit on him.

He doesn't seem to use facebook though, beyond having an account. I'm trying to resist the urge to be a complete creep, but almost everything on his timeline is posted by other people.

I'm not getting a good feeling about this. I thought he was shy and lonely like me, but it seems like he has lots of options and lots of friends. I was hoping this would open us up to at least being better friends, but now my confidence is shot.

Thanks anyway, anon.

>>17927559
Social media can misrepresent a lot of aspects of peoples' lives. I'm a chronic social media checker myself and all it does is stress me out when I see like a girl I like in a picture with another guy or something like that. But I've found that in reality a lot of stuff on social media doesn't really mean much.

Since you're in a study group together, maybe text him and ask him about your class or whatever and try to open up a conversation from there? That would be a path to friendship. I know I used that move on some girls, not sure if it would work from the other way around.

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To women but any advice would be appreciated.

3ed date, first two were lunch dates. We're seeing a movie and then getting some drinks after. Have not done anything physical yet and i'm kind of nervous. Should I put my arm over her shoulder during the movie and would kissing at the end of the night after some drinks be ok?

>>17927245
Omg yes. Didn't know this was such a thing with other girls enough for men to know about it though.

>>17927252
Flirt with her more explicitly.

>>17927324
Yes, but only because he's Earnest Hemingway.

>>17927245
How in the world does that work?

>>17927615
Don't put your arm around her, please for the love of god. It's cliché and cheesy, and also giving someone a dead arm, not being able to move out because you're lying in someone's arm for 2 hours is pretty awkward.

I'd give her a kiss at the end of the night. Maybe hold her hand/walk with your arm around her when you're leaving the theatre.

question for girls, or everyone, really...:
let's say a guy showed himself interested in some girl you know for, say, a month, but only wanted to fuck her and/or use her emotionally. how would you feel about it?

I want to fuck this ugly girl and also use her to learn more about relationships... but I don't like her, and I'm not sure if I should be doing this.

I'm a socially retarded 30 y.o., and while I'm good looking and have had many opportunities, I just can't talk to girls I like, because I fear I'll fuck it up, I'll get too involved or something. I also have some traumas...

>>17927673
Too bad you're not in Austin, I'm a girl that wants to use someone just for relationship and sex experience. No harm, no foul. Arguably good looking but also socially retarded and traumatized by past attempts.

>>17927682
>Too bad you're not in Austin
:'(
hope you find someone, babe

>>17927673
btw, should I tell her at some point?

guess I'll ask two more questions...
how do you know when to be honest with someone? at what age one should be totally honest to people one may like?

>>17927688
You shouldn't use someone anon, really ever. It can arguably ok if you're upfront about it - tell her you just want to have a good time and you're not looking for anything serious. Then it's arguably her fault if she catches the feelings and gets hurt - but really that's just something nasty people say to make them feel better about being so nasty. You know you're entering into a very likely situation for someone to get hurt.

Your best bet is to find someone like >>17927682. It's probably pretty hard to do.

>>17927703
I do it. I have a sense of humor. I don't know.

One of the funniest things I've ever seen was when my ex and I were standing underneath a canopy while it rained so we could smoke a cigarette. At a certain point the canopy on his side overflowed and dumped water all over him. I laughed so hard I started crying.

I think it's only shitty if they get mad at you when you do the same thing.

Also, seriously getting hurt emotionally or physically is never funny, though I may use humor to break the tension.

>argument with gf
>go through subjects A,B,C and so on without letting loose ends
>almost settling down
>brings up subjects from the beginning of the arument again
>every
>fucking
>time

Why women, WHY THE FUCK???

>>17927724
I swear to god there's times I want to fucking draw a flowcharts and glue several copies to the fucking walls

>>17927705
>>17927682
jesus christ 4chan, why do you make me suffer? ;_;

ok m8, I'll tell her, thank you for your advice.

>>17927716
>water gets dumped on your boyfriend and you laugh

That's called being an insensitive cunt

>>17927703
>>17927765
How does it feel to have no sense of humor?

>>17927765
but its really funny you faggot.

>>17927765
It was just water. He was going to live.

I wouldn't laugh if a bunch of knives fell on him.

Probably.

>>17927789
For real though, it was funny. I've done dumb shit that my gf laughed to tears over.

>in regular clothes out for a drive (important for later)
>driving and and stopped at the beach car park to use bathrooms
>they're those ones with electric push button doors
>figure there might be another bathroom on the other side since its a big toilet block
>walk around back and find what looks like a door and has the exact same bush button
>press button and i'm sprayed from above with water
>turned out it was a shower for after you've been swimming
>completely drench myself in water
>get back in car, sit down and she just laughs as i tell her what happened
>laugh too since its funny as fuck

You have to be able to laugh at yourself.

>>17927615
Good point, I wont. Good idea about the hand holding, could do that if we're walking to where we'll be eating.

Cool, feeling a bit less nervous.

Guys, how much does/did your first girlfriend mean to you?

>>17927849
Nothing at all to be honest. We dated a few years at the start of highschool, broke up and then I dated other people. The only significant girlfriend I've had is my current gf who I've been with for about 4 years and will probably marry.

I've only got one testicle so my sack is long and wrinkley.
I'm a virgin but if things go well I won't be much longer.
Am I being paranoid thinking she'll react negatively about this.
I've never told anyone about it before.

>>17927849
not much. why?

>>17927635
ask women man, I don't know

>>17927859
Nah, don't worry about it. One of my favourite male porn stars has only one ball, resulting from testicular cancer, and its not off putting at all.

>>17927863
I should have probably phrased my question a bit better, but I'm wondering like if you guys cared a lot about your first girlfriend when you dated them because it was your first relationship or if you didn't give a fuck because you had no idea what you were doing.

>>17927859
Was it from some kind of medical thing or has it been like that from birth? Either way, just explain it. It shouldn't be that much of a big deal and if she takes issue with it then she's not worth it.

>>17927872
I see. Well in that case I guess I did but I was new to everything so it was a mixture of hormones, wanting to be liked and just simple immaturity that made me think it was love but it honestly wasn't. I suppose I cared about her in some way but it wasn't the way that I cared for other girlfriends when I got older and matured.

I also didn't know what the fuck I was doing either if that helps. Why the curiosity?

>>17927859

Don't worry about it. Even perfect testicles are not particularly good looking. The ugliest testicles are still probably within range of the best looking testicles.

>>17927889

I'm feeling kind of unhappy right now with my relationship, because while my boyfriend is great when we hang out in person, we only manage to hang out once a week, and he barely talks to me the other 6 days. If I don't text him, he usually won't text me at all. I would just appreciate it if he actually texted me more and at least asked me how my day went. I want to ask him to at least talk to me a little more (not like 24/7 attention or anything), but I don't want to offend him. Since this is his first relationship and he's a quiet guy to begin with, I know I shouldn't expect a lot but at least having a "How are you?', just anything to show that he cares once a day would be nice.

>>17927901
He probably just doesn't like texting. I'm honestly the same since I feel it's impersonal and takes away from the time when we're together. It's not that I don't care, it's just that I don't like texting and prefer being in person.

Considering that he's a quiet guy too, it's not that weird. It's also impossible to read emotion from a text too so that probably causes a little anxiety for him.

>>17927918
True. In that case, would it be better if I asked him if I could call him sometimes?

>>17927933
Absolutely. It'll help him get more used to things. Just talking to him about it will help a lot too, he probably doesn't know it's bothering you this much.

Girls ( & Guys)

How can I actually try to keep text conversations moving forward? Just something to get it moving along nicely. I sometimes manage to do something that allows us to talk for hours, but I don't know what it is.

>>17927960
keep pivoting the subject

it's been 5 months.
So far i managed not to hate myself too much, not to think about her too much.
But right now it's 6 in the morning and i'm stalking her soundscloud from the week i broke up with her.

youtube.com/watch?v=tdpWmlScve8

help
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdpWmlScve8

>>17927964
I guess, it's just that theres rarely a reasonable point to do that.

>>17927970
Did she break up with you or did you break up with her? And why?

>>17927988
I broke up with her. I felt like i could'nt love her.
I could'nt not lie to her. Also other girls..

>>17927996
Why not spend time with those other girls then?

>>17927960
I want to know the opposite of this.
I can keep a conversation going but can't start one for the life of me.
It's usually just "how's it going?" or some shit like that.

Both: When your SO gets sick, is it a good idea to go over to their place to cheer them up and take care of them? I don't care about getting sick, but as a person with a fever/cold, would you hate it if you had someone come over?

>>17928007
I tried, they just all feel bland..

>>17925565
^This.
BTW, do you want a pathological relationship? Because that's how you get into a pathological relationship.

>>17928018
this is subjective
if you do not know your partners preference already, ask them

>>17926637
Tissues.

Men -
In your experience, if you're in a friends with benefits situation with a woman, do you disregard her as a potential girlfriend?

>>17928055
No, I'd probably consider wanting her as a girlfriend but probably assume it's not what she wants so I wouldn't ever try to bring it up.

>>17928024
Go out and meet some new people at the bar or gym or anywhere, it's all you can do to get your mind off of the girl you lost. Either way, you should feel guilty since you dumped a girl for silly reasons

Girls: What actually makes a guy interesting?

I do interesting things such as working on classic cars, building and repairing general stuff around my apartment, trying out exotic foods, listening to a lot of music and playing instruments, fitness etc but I feel like I'd be a bore for talking about any of it.

>>17928059
Thanks for the input anon! I've been in three fwb "relationships" and have been told three times that they're not looking for a relationship. Was just wondering if guys thought like this or if I might be the problem or whatever. Anxiety, you know?

>>17928065
Your level of enthusiasm when you talk about the things you like. If you're super into something and you make that apparent, I'm gonna be super into it with you because I like that you're into things. If that makes sense?

>>17928018
I did with my ex. She seemed to appreciate it.

>>17928018
This is subjective. If I've been with that person for a while and they've already seen me looking terrible then I absolutely want to be taken care of. Treat me like a goddam baby.

>>17927349
>If one of us had just stepped up
Shit. Been there. Same situation- she rejected me. Then after a long time as colleagues I was leaving. She came to me and whisperd that she actually liked me back after all, but thought that it was a lost cause. Then she just kissed me on the cheek and left.
It's been a few years, but I still think about her sometimes and still hate myself for not noticing it and trying again earlier.

>>17928067
>Your level of enthusiasm when you talk about the things you like. If you're super into something and you make that apparent
I try to do that. I don't go over the top of course but it still seems like any girl I talk to about some of these things just has no interest at all. I've been trying to think of some fairly regular activities I could involve them in but I can't think of any. I doubt a girl I've just started seeing would be interested in hearing about me putting thermal paint on an exhaust pipe of a car.

>>17928067
It just depends on the person. I was in a FWB and absolutely wanted a relationship at the end but she didn't, so things fizzled out. It all comes down to the person honestly but with a FWB thing I guess the general expectation is in the title.

Every year I'm getting older and every year I'm still a virgin.
I don't hate myself for my current status but I fear that as I age with my virginity, I lose value as a man.

Would a 35 year old fit rich man be repulsive because he's a virgin?
I've just had the mindset of "Once I've made it, I'll date"
But it's been so long

I just feel that if I ever date a woman I really like and it gets to the point where we're going to fuck, I'll have to tell her that I'm a virgin.
And then she'll laugh and leave.

>>17928055
Usually, yes. Most of the time it just means it is a fling and that is all. My current gf started as an fwb, but that was more because she was nervous about dating a man and wanted to proceed with caution.

>>17928075
It's not about her being interested, it's about her appreciating you enough to pretend that she's interested because /you/ like it. Relationships don't work unless you're willing to appreciate the little things your partner has to offer and settle on middle ground for something you both enjoy.
If a woman doesn't appreciate that you have hobbies and attempt to listen to your passions, she isn't worth your time. That goes both ways, show interest in things she likes as well. You can find something you both enjoy doing and still have your respective hobbies.

>>17927849

Depends on the person.

I think for me and most of my friends, our first girlfriends meant a lot (like for a lot of us, the relationship lasts multiple years, with the appearance they might not end), but I also definitely know some other guys who it meant jack all for.

>>17927458
>How good is facebook at gauging someone's feelings?

I have an older cousin who's hitting his 50's, and he's a tech savy guy (dot com millionaire. semi-retired. Still makes apps for giggles), but he's idly been trying to figure out what social media really means to the new gen

He was noticing a younger cousin (about 17) scrolling away on her phone on facebook/instagram/whatever, "like"ing just about every single picture she went by with a pretty bored expression on her face.

So at some point he looks over her shoulder and asks, "So do you actually like any of those?"

She responds, "No. Not really. it's just what we do, and if we don't, people get mad. To be honest, It's kind of a giant pain in the butt".


That about sum-mates exactly how much meaning social media "likes" have.

>>17927340
>I'm screwed, huh?
No, you just gotta work at it--like everyone else.

>have trouble developing feelings, but can be very intense once they're there, i'm either infatuated or in love or i'm not.

Doesn't matter if they're 15, 25, or 35, that's most people when they start off dating.

Get experience, practice, and it goes away and you learn to reign in and control your feelings.

Just go do it. Everyone's got their own brand of fucked up, it's all about meeting someone whose crazy compliments yours.

>>17928055
> do you disregard FWB as a potential girlfriend?

Only ever been in a FWB once. That's how it started, that's how it ended. FWB is not pre-girlfirend phase. It is just sex, no emotions attached. That is the ENTIRE point.

Anyone I've ever been romantically interested in, even if we're having casual sex, i'm always pretty clear I'm interested in them beyond the sex.

>>17927765
That's called being the kind of person I enjoy interacting with xD

>>17928079
I've never met another woman who has laughed at a man for being a virgin and then left. If you screen your partner properly and find that you're comfortable with them then you should be fine. Communication is key. If you're particularly worried, maybe get a toy to practice on? I know it's one thing to be with a person vs. a toy, but it's a start.
But as long as you've found someone you're comfortable with there shouldn't be a problem. Good luck out there anon!

>>17928095
Essentially you're saying "Find a woman who won't laugh at you"
I doubt my ability to discern this before it becomes too late

I don't have a lot of experience with women
I went to college as an introverted kid and then I joined the military as an officer
Now that my career is secure, I want to date.

I haven't really talked to a woman in over 10 years

>>17928100
>find a woman who won't laugh at you
That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying, find someone you're comfortable sharing yourself with. Find a partner you don't censor yourself with, someone you're not afraid to look dumb in front of. That doesn't mean love, it means comfortable. Someone you can relax around and make ugly faces at. People are more inclined to be understanding towards one another when we've shared something together. Bond, get comfy, and bang.

>>17928106
I've never felt that with anyone
Not even my family

If I ever meet someone like that, I'll consider trying to fuck them
But man, it feels like you're telling me to find a unicorn
It's just as hearsay to me

>>17928079
The "once X happens, I'll date" is the shittiest feedback loop you can get into. If you're afraid of relationships X will just change. It will go from losing some extra pounds to moving out of your parents' house to getting your teeth fixed or whatever.
Find some time and date casually, it's hard (been there, done that), but it's the only way.

And for the virgin thing? Don't sweat it. If you're about to fuck- it won't matter at that point. And the first times with every partner are usually mediocre at best. Also, some girls consider not being a "stud" as a good thing.

Good luck anon!

>>17926955
Thank you that helped a lot

Guys and girls:

What are forgivable ways your partner could hurt you? And which are immediate grounds for dumping?

Examples: Slapping, punching, choking

>>17928165
I think any kind of physical abuse is grounds for dumping a guy.

>>17928165
Guy here.
Non-sexually: slapping, punching (a slap on the chest during a quarrel, non-serious punch as an answer to a joke)

Sexually: scratching (back/chest); not into slapping (e.g. ass), but it wouldn't be anything bad

Grounds for dumping: slap on the face, punching or kicking to hurt not just as a gesture, anything making me feel "afraid"

Last semester I talked to this girl a lot, we hit it off at first and I told her I liked her, she said she did too. We didn't make it official yet but I tried progressing the relationship further. She resisted my advances (didn't want to kiss but constantly asked to come over) so I got confused as hell and tried to break it off before winter break. She got really sad and asked for another chance so I said yes. Over break though I've realized I don't actually want a relationship, and feel like I've been leading her on. How should I tell her all this when we see each other once school starts?

>>17928165
Dude here. In the bedroom I like it rough, but the rule for me is ask if you're unsure and if I say no, then you'd better respect that no. Outside of the bedroom the rule is if you hurt me, it is over.

Other women,

How do you get the pussy hairs that are growing right out of/on the border of the pink bits? I don't want to put any kind of hair removal device near that part and I'm pretty sure you don't Nair it.

Men,

How do you find a guy who likes hairy women without creepy fetish websites?

>>17928219
>realized I don't actually want a relationship,

So what is it that you ACTUALLY want?
Just to fool around? To spend time with her? To be alone now?

Because it sounds like even YOU don't really know what the fuck it is you want, so I don't know why you're jumping the gun to shut things down before you've even done anything.

Be honest and upfront about what it is you want, both to yourself, and to other people. Give yourself--and them--that respect.

>>17928219
One, you're her entertainment
Don't mistake this about women
It's not about partnership
It's about making her life more worthwhile
I mean fuck, she's got like 5 other guys in your exact position
Be better than them

And second, be bold
Push the limit
You need to simultaneously make her feel wanted but also make her the one who wants her most.

>>17928165

If it's meant as violent, then it's grounds for breakup.

If it's done during sex without making sure I consent first, also breakup territory.

If it's - and this is admittedly a grey area - emotional abuse, then it's grounds for breakup.

>>17928234
>How do you find a guy who likes hairy women without creepy fetish websites?
Likes? Not sure but it depends on how hairy. Really long pubes and hairy armpits are a definite no for me and most guys.

Indifference is fairly easy to find. Just keep things at least trimmed and it's all good.

>>17928079

>35
>rich

It's your looks, Anon.

>>17928234
There's a girl I like
And she often neglects shaving because reasons
She's not ugly by any means
And she's not fat or tumblr feminist

But sometimes she doesn't shave

I don't find it bad at all
I'm not attracted to hairy women
But a hairy woman isn't the end of the world

Unless it's thick black hair up to the belly button and up the asscrack
Then it feels like fucking a man

As for shaving advice, as a man, when I shave my lips, I stretch them. I got muscles under my face to do so, but maybe manual stretching can work?

>>17928234
I take a washcloth and cover my clit/vagina. That way I can shave the very edge without worrying about the razor slipping. Try to pull the skin to make it taut.

>>17928252
Is that all it takes?
I mean I haven't tried much
I don't think my face is ugly
I got a bit of a potato Irish thing going on, but my chin is strong and I have good cheekbones

The bottom line is that I don't try without knowing I can succeed

>>17928234
>How do you find a guy who likes hairy women without creepy fetish websites?

Uhh... maybe I can't speak for guys your age (because I'm hitting my late 20's) but--presuming at least some basic trimming control goes on--I really do question how many guys have EVER seen a girl with pubic hair and just nope'd the fuck out. I think you overestimate how much guys give a shit by the time that many layers of clothes are gone.

>>17928113

not the guy you responded too but.


This sound nice but i'm skeptical I can pull off the nothing but my romantically inexperience company to offer dating

could you perhaps share some experience(s)?/reasoning in this regard? it could be helpful

>>17928259

By not trying much, do you mean not showering/tidying facial hair/etc?

The Well Cultured Anonymous has a thorough guide to grooming that covers all the basics if you feel like you need that. Basic grooming isn't just for grills - people are nicer to you in general if you make an effort.

>>17928263
>I think you overestimate how much guys give a shit by the time that many layers of clothes are gone.
A lot of guys do. An amazonian jungle down there can be gross and sweat gets caught in the hair which gives of one bad ass reek.

>>17928272
>do you mean not showering/tidying facial hair/etc?
Fuck no
I still work
I have to be clean and proper for work

I just don't actively seek women out
My workplace is, by nature, only men

>>17928280

>don't seek women out

There's the problem, then. Women will assume that a rich 35-year-old professional is already taken or if he's not taken, he's cheating.

Go to a bar alone, join a club, take a class, join Plenty of Fish or whatever paid dating service is available to you, go to any conferences that work offers (or even geek cons - you've probably seen the articles about shit that goes down at those. Most of what gets publicized is gay but women are just quieter about who they fuck). Just meet people in general and the women will follow.

>>17927716
>having a good time with my girlfriend
>water gets dumped on me
>she starts laughing hysterically like a retard

I'm so sorry for the people that have to interact with you.

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Is it super autistic to ask "wanna go back to your place" after a date?

>>17925036
Gimme a short explanation of what happened when you are in a period?

>>17928482
I put on a pad or stick in a tampon and take an ibuprofen if I have cramps, and then I get on with life.

When you're making out with a girl and she grabs you by the dick, does that mean she likes you?

How to tell someone their shit taste in movies sucks? This loser won't quit bragging about boring as fuck movies such as marlie and me that retarded beastiality movie staring jennifer cuckedston.

>>17928482
i am a bit moody about a week prior. then i notice that i get very hungry, about two days prior. then, the day before my period, i get very gassy. then i get some light spotting and after a day or two, the bleeding is the strongest. after about 3 days, it gets less and then slowly fades and is completely over again after about 10 days total. that's rather long tough. most girls have much shorter periods.

Why do girls dislike dick pics? Do they not like the look of dicks?

Every guy loves tit or vag pics, why is it different for women?

>>17928709

Most chicks aren't interested to start with and the sight of a dick isn't going to interest most of us. Also, we're generally more psychological than visual or even physical. All the hot bodies and clit rubbies in the world aren't going to get me off if my brain isn't there.

TL;DR They don't dislike the pic, they dislike you and your timing.

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>>17928709
depends on the circumstances.
if i'm getting some from my bf after we have bantered some and both got horny, i love them.
but if i get one and am not in the right mood/it's not from someone i WANT to see his cock/it's inappropriate it feels like pic related

Why do girls vaginas look like credit card readers?

>>17928666
Do every girl go through the same manner of time?

Or can it vary?

>>17928719
no, it depends on your hormonal balance. it doesn't have to be the same every time and it can change a lot over time, for example, after childbirth.
and every girl is different. some experience this very strongly, some just bleed for 3 days and have zero other symptoms.

>>17928715
well said. can wholeheartedly agree.

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>>17928718
because you have never seen a credit card reader or/and a vagina irl?

ok, there are some similarities. but maybe that's because your cock is the equivalent of a credit card?

>>17928729
Oh okay thank you.

>>17928755
why do you ask? what exactly do you need to know?

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>>17925036
Women: is there a way to hide nervousness from you?
Context: been dating a new girl every week since gf of 2 years broke up with me and have had a shit load of confidence. Today start talking to a cute girl in highschool and i feel like i spaghetti everytime i message her.

>>17928836
back from highschool* essential part i feel like

>>17925245
My girlfriend is "mean" to me (teasing, joking insults, etc.), and is ridiculously picky about things. I in turn tease her about exactly that, but overall she's much more "mean" to me than I am to her. It doesn't bother me at all.

From how you described it, it doesn't sound like this is a big issue to him.

>>17925834
>>17925877
>>17927455
>>17925908
People, men or women, who play mind games (like the silent treatment) with their partners are obviously not mature enough for a committed relationship.

>>17925915
Yes. Other anons are saying they don't, but I've always been aware of it. It's not in a sexual way. Even if it's your family, it's still noticeable, but only as a "there is a difference between hugging men and women" type thing, if that makes sense. I actively enjoy it if I'm hugging my girlfriend.

guys,

please talk me put of looking trough my bf's phone. he left it here and will be gone for a few hours. i can easily access it because i have fingerprint access to it. i know it's a very silly idea since i a) know he has nothing to hide b)i can't gain anything from snooping and c) will feel guilty if i do.
i don't know why the urge to still do it is so strong. it's just tempting for me to go trough people's private things...

>>17926619
I don't want kids, but if I was forced to pick I'd want girls. I find men in general hard to talk to, interact with, and understand.

>>17926745
As long as it doesn't bother you, tell him not to feel badly.

>>17928916

It's there because you either think there is something to find, or you WANT to find something. Why are you so focused on something that will damage your relationship regardless of the outcome?

You will either check his phone and find something - in which case, would you honestly leave him? Regardless of the answer, you have literally zero credibility as he can just defend his actions by saying you shouldn't have snooped.

Alternatively, you'll check his phone, you won't find anything and you will (or should) feel like shit because you've abused your boyfriends trust. You've instantly become the wrong doer and even if he never finds out, you'll always know.

Another outcome is that you'll be so hellbent on finding something to justify you looking in the first place that you'll focus on something completely innocent and turn it into something awful.

Don't do it, trust your boyfriend and distract yourself.

>>17926972
Cringe. I'd probably say as little as possible and hope they'd go away. But it obviously depends on location. If you're at a social event of some kind, it's more expected. If I'm just minding my own business shopping or walking somewhere, I don't want to be harassed.

>>17927012
You're friendzoning girls. Yes, completely platonic male-female friendships can happen, but they're the exception and not the rule.

>>17928922
i know that he doesn't do anything he shouldn't. it just seems like a sneak peak into who he is when nobody is looking. guess it's tempting to me to know what mails he gets, who he texts with, what sites he visits, what he reads, what apps he uses, what kind of pics he saved.
i know there are no other girls or anythig like it. i am just so fucking curious... but i know i will feel like shit if i did, so i won't. but aaaargh!

>>17925143
been there bro
all you can do is get another girl and then see how she feels

>>17928927

If you're so curious - just ask him. He'll tell you everything he wants you to know, and if you trust him then you'll believe him. Simple as that.

>>17928931
yeah, you're right.
i'm going to distract myself now with shitposting.
thanks anon

>>17925094
we actually fall in love
that never goes away

i hate that shit

>>17927340
A lack of relationship experience and being a virgin are not red flags, as a woman. Cutting is the biggest red flag. It just says "instability", which is a shame because even though you may have changed, they are permanent. Common mental health issues are not horrible (depression, anxiety, etc), but if they are to the point of requiring medication or hospitalization then that is a red flag, but depends on the person. Someone with a similar experience may sympathize with you much more than someone without that experience.

In my opinion, it doesn't sound like you know yourself very well, in terms of figuring out if you're asexual or not and how you described being in love vs not at all. And that isn't conducive to forming a stable relationship. If you don't know what you want, the other person surely won't either.

You're not screwed. Everyone has a few red flags, and yours are things that have already happened and cannot be changed, so don't stress about them. Work on figuring out what you want in a relationship. Is trust most important? Companionship? Stability? Do you have a "type" of guy you like, looks or personality wise? Just thinking about some of those things would be a step in the right direction.

>>17927849
A lot, considering we're still dating and have been for 5 years. So maybe I'm a bit biased, haha.

I'll answer your question a bit better. If her and me were to be broken up, she would still mean a lot to me, as I developed a lot of my physical appearance/personality/sexual preferences based on her. Depending on the way the relationship ended, I could see myself still caring about her very much and potentially remaining good friends with her.

>>17927859
I had an undefended testicle as a little kid, so mine have an extreme size difference. I've never had a complaint. Testicles are weird, ugly things in general, and attraction or sexual arousal is typically not based on them at all. I'd maybe mention it beforehand as a courtesy, but don't apologize or act embarrassed. Just own it. She won't care.

>>17928959
Undecended*

>>17927996
And now you're understanding how it feels to throw something good away based on fixable problems. It's useful to feel how you're feeling now, so that you'll value your partners more in the future. Embrace it.

>>17928079
If she laughs and leaves then you'll have dodged a bullet on a ridiculously shallow woman.

>>17928768
my mom was grumpy yesterday and i was just wondering

Boyfriend and I have been close friends for several years and finally chose to be together last year. Things are great, we've managed to keep a lot of the benefits of friendship with the added awesomeness of a more intimate relationship.

So...we know pretty much everything about each other. Past conquests, relationships, intimate details about previous fucks, the entire thing. We're also very open with each other even now and I don't think he has ever refused to answer a question or lied to me.

I feel myself becoming more and more uncomfortable with all this knowledge. I adore the fact we're open with each other but I end up asking questions I know are going to bother me. It's like an addiction. And I know he'll answer every time. I didn't give a shit before we were together because it was entertaining and I could give advice, but now I feel like it's all competition.

I can't react because if I do, he'll stop being so honest with me and it might damage the dynamics of our relationship. However, my poor ego can't really deal with knowing about the women he has fucked and how they liked it.

What do I do? This is best relationship I've ever been in but also, feels like I'm at risk of losing more if I mess it up.

Girls

How bad of a deal is breaking up with someone you've already broken up with twice, to be with someone else?

This girl i'm talking about is clearly feeling ashamed of her felings towards me

>>17928984
>Past conquests, relationships, intimate details about previous fucks,
you shouldn't
why?
>I feel myself becoming more and more uncomfortable with all this knowledge.
this is why you NEVER talk about past relationships you're only going to think about that, compare and ultimately destroy the chance you're getting with the partner

>>17928984

New Thread - >>17928994

New Thread - >>17928994

New Thread - >>17928994

New Thread - >>17928994

New Thread - >>17928994

My favorite prostitute is on vacation. ;_;

>>17928998
Thanks!

>>17928344
Oh no a little water fell on him! Get over yourself, you humorless hack. If anything, I feel sorry for the girl who has to date a toddler instead of a man.

>>17928014
I used that in the past, and I ended up talking to her for the better part of the day.

>>17926619
at least 2
at most 5

no pref for boy or girl

>>17928493
Can mean:
-she likes you
-she wants to judge your cock size
-she only wants sex
-she thinks that's what you want her to do

There's really no telling without more info.