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This is long, I'm sorry. So I'm an introverted person

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This is long, I'm sorry.

So I'm an introverted person that has very few friends. After moving back to my hometown for the holidays I met up once with an ex of mine that I talk with very often and are friends. It's been almost 2 weeks since then and while talking last night she says that I have no respect and no appreciation for her, and I don't like spending time with her because I never tell her to go out.

In the 2 weeks I've come home I left the house 3 other times, twice to meet up with my 2 best friends and once to go to a psychologist.

I apologise and tell her that I'm like that all the time and never take initiative to tell anyone to go out, she said that I just don't respect any of my friends or like them either then. I suggest we meet in a few days, she says that "it's something you should want to do not feel obligated". So I say, that if I didn't tell her to meet it doesn't mean that I wouldn't like spending time with her.

Now I'm left feeling like a pice of shit because I feel like she's right, but it's not like I don't like spending time with her. Even if I'm ever thinking of telling one of my 2 best friends to meet up, I don't, because they mostly like to go out at places with loud music and drink, both things I don't like doing so I don't want to interfere with their plans like a cunt. But when they suggest something I mostly accept.Also lately I've been feeling a bit depressed because I just quit university because I couldn't handle my studies.

So is she right? What can I do to change her mind?
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>>17906887
Seems like you're in a pretty dark place. I think a good way to seem more socially active is to just -ask- your friends if they want to hang out.They'd never think that was a cunty thing to do; they'd be glad you wanted to hang out.

As for the ex, gone is usually gone, but if you -really- liked her, then tell her that. Maybe send a long, heartfelt text or something, telling her that you "get it now", admit that you simply didn't think asking people out was appropriate and that you're sorry for acting like an ass. That you get it if she doesn't wanna hang out anymore but that you'd be really happy for just one shot at making things up to her. Finish with a mention of being glad to have known her even if she wants to end it for good.

I can't guarantee a success, but she might budge. Good luck.


I'm no professional but if you ever feel really down or want to talk, I usually hang ut at https://discord.gg/BzSuS .


Keep trucking, cowboy.
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>>17907006
Thanks for the advice and the invite. I'll speak to her but not in a text, I'd prefer to meet up and do it face to face.
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>>17907021 i youre right here, talking about this stuff over text is as useful as lint.
Also you shouldnt feel like you have to change yourself for anyone else. You are just as important as them. What they want from you isnt more important than what you want for yourself.
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>>17907021
Women actually tend to like the written word in my experience, and sending a letter isn't really in style anymore; it's -breaking up- that you should never do in a text. Still as long as you feel better and more confident, I'm glad. O_-
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>>17906887
>>17906887

>girl gets mad at OP for not telling her to go out
>has been an introvert all his life
>you'd think the ex would have gotten that message a long time ago
>yet she's gonna be pissy about it?

Maybe you should find someone else to spend time with. She's your ex for a reason, bro.
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>>17907054
>Also you shouldnt feel like you have to change yourself for anyone else. You are just as important as them. What they want from you isnt more important than what you want for yourself.
Thanks, it really helps to hear that from someone other than myself, makes it a a lot more convincing.
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>>17907072
We broke up because I stopped having feelings for her, not because we didn't fit as people, but I guess you're right. Maybe we don't get each other all that much.
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>>17906887
Your ex seems like she fails to truly recognize your situation. You have no reason to feel bad.
As other anons have said, it can help to ask your friends out tho. If they don't want to go, oh well, maybe next time.
Two questions tho, do you have social anxiety? Are you insecure in ways?
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>>17907335
Yes to both of those :\
I'm really insecure about my looks and even went through a phase where a would always wear a hoodie. I think that's what led to my social anxeity for the most part. The anxiety isn't too severe, but I once left a class at my university because I wasn't feeling comfortable.
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>>17907354
Okay then, that's definitely a factor. I don't think she recognizes just how insecure you are, or insecurity itself. Try talking with her about how insecure you are and how you have social anxiety.
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>>17907465
I'll try but I think it's gonna be all that easy, talking about it here to anons is no problem, but whenever I have a problem I don't share it with anyone in real life because I instantly feel like a giant pussy.
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>>17906887
She's has no right to be mad at you for not telling her to hang out, but she's right in the way that you should just tell people to hang out. I know it seems unnatural because you're not used to doing it often, but it is better to just tell people "hey are you doing something today".
Also keep your friends, even if you don't get them sometimes. You don't have too many to not care about losing them.
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