How can I be less worried about saying the right thing to a girl?

>>17893450

by realizing there is no 'right thing' to say to a girl.

girls are not robots all running the same scripts. pressing the right buttons in the right order will not get the desired outcome.

you are not looking for a girl that you confused, tricked, or manipulated. you are waiting til a girl lights a spark in you, and then you just hope that you light a spark in her.

girls dont sit around thinking 'WOW ANONS OKAY, IF HE SAYS THE RIGHT THINGSI MIGHT JUST GO ON A DATE WITH HIM, BUT ONLY IF HE TEXTS ME FOR THREE MONTHS SAYIGN THE RIGHT STUFF LOLOLOLOLOL'

a couple days in a girl already knows if shes into you or not. you dont want to wait that long to make a move. i never wait more than 24 hours.

Be alpha type your messages in caps lock.

I kid but so far I haven't had much luck with online dating.

>>17893456
>you are not looking for a girl that you confused, tricked, or manipulated
I don't want to do that but I think a girl likes me and that's really putting me on the spot, like every letter matters.

>>17893478

if she actually likes you the letters matter much less, she is itnerested in you. and if the natural you turns otu to be unappealing thats not a failure. thats not you being judged as 'not enough'. its just a mismatch.

you have to remember its not a contest. women are not being objective. they liek you are emotional. they are on a different spectrum of emotion, sure.

>>17893488
That was good to hear, you really gave me the courage and perspective needed to send her a reply, thanks anon.

>>17893568

no problem anon.

I emailed her 4 and a half hours ago like I said, and now she's online hasn't responded.

I wish these facts didn't make me as anxious as they do but I don't think I'm being unfair considering the chain of events
>She volunteers her email after I volunteer mine
>I email her that night, pretty shitty email
>6 days go by and no response
>Send a better email
>She responds to the second email 4 days later, leaving me hanging for nearly 2 weeks in total
>I don't respond because it's Christmas Eve and she gave me no reason as to why she took so long to respond
>Send her an email today as mentioned
>No response
I don't know how normal people can make themselves vulnerable enough to fall for someone.

How bout you ask her out? You should only chit chat for 30 minutes MAX before asking her out setting up a definite date.

>>17894354
Well that ship has sailed then. We talked our respective ears off for 2 and a half hours on the last day of class(in community college) and I only asked if she wanted to go to the cafeteria to get something to eat at the end right when her mom happened to be there to pick her up then >>17894343 happened

>>17894368

You might have talked her out of being interested in you, OP. This is why I always advise my friends to avoid chit chat over phone/texting before you are official. it makes girls lose interest and get bored of you.

Ask her out one more time. If she says no, walk away and stop contacting her.

>>17894374
>Ask her out one more time. If she says no, walk away and stop contacting her.
Before she gets back to the new email?

If she somehow has a legit reason(I doubt it but still) then by sending another email I'll just be "needy" or "clingy" or whatever the fuck won't I?

>>17894394

Yeah don't ask her out until she responds to your email. Your lack of action in response to her lack of response displays confidence and a busy lifestyle, which will give her more incentive to respond.

When she gets back to you, don't mention that you haven't heard from her in a while. Just send 2-3 casual texts MAX then ask her out.

>>17894404
I'll be honest, right now I don't feel inclined to do that, I have an impulse to get angry at her and address this, I feel like calling her out, accusing her of a variety of different things she may not be doing, tearing her down and force her to look the other way whenever we see each other when the semester comes back in session.

I'm not even cut out to date or play the game, I'm as without independent transportation as she is, I don't have a job yet and I've 0 experience with girls. I'm a loser.

I realize it's just my current mood and I really do like her and I'm grateful for the advice you gave and will use it but this is all just very frustrating.

>>17894430

Lmao you're acting how women act. Stop that shit. Why is a woman getting on your nerves? You don't love yourself enough.

Stop worrying about this girl. Go focus on getting a job and improving yourself. You're worrying about the wrong things, THAT'S why they're not working out.

Your priority should always be your own growth and success. Don't say that petty, feminine shit to her. Go get some good night's sleep and start applying for jobs tomorrow. Stop worrying about shit that doesn't deserve your attention.

>>17894450
I was venting but I have pretty strong control over my impulses but they're there and I wanted to address it all somewhere even if I would obviously never act on that shit and would hate myself if I did.

That said, I don't know if getting a job as a full time student about to study the hardest shit related to my major thus far is a great idea, though you're shining a big fucking spotlight on the underlying problems I have I think. I'm doing shit all at the moment and I think it's been eating me up, I feel really without a purpose and any sense of growth right now. Perhaps self-learning before the semester commences and really piling it on so I have something on my mind may help.

>>17893450
Give up on women

>>17894515
Kill yourself asap my man