I had a fling with a female friend and she dumped me before the

Being socially isolated is just about never a useful thing. If these really were your closest friends and if they're reaching out to you despite having done "crazy shit" then that sounds like a friendship worth salvaging.

The "crazy shit" sounds like something to work through. Could we hear about that?

>>17889560
I'd log into her social medias to see who she was talking too. Post breakup, whenever I see her with other guy friends, I'd text him and harass him about it. I'd ask my friends that were there if they were starting to see each other and I guess they got tired of it and told her. I'd say a bunch of clingy and sappy things and it just made her uncomfortable. I went to her house once to apologize and asked her if she wanted to come outside but she told me to just leave.
I want to be their friend again but I don't want to stick for the ride while she falls for someone else. She said we could be acquaintances but not friends and that tells me that things will never be the same anymore. That there will always be something to keep me at a distance from getting close to them again.

>>17889569
From what you've said about violating her privacy and harassing other people, I think it's understandable if she doesn't see a way for you to be friends again. But do you think that bridge being burned really stops you from reconnecting with other friends who also know her? I think if you make it clear you're working on self improvement, the friends who are reaching out to you can be just as close to you as they were in the past. I think it's very important to hold on to those connections.

>>17889577
I'm more introverted and she's extroverted so she has a closer connection to them than me. If I do reconnect with them, I'd have to fake how I felt about the whole situation, pretend that nothing bothers me, or else they'll think I'm obsessing over her again and tell her. She was also a good friend too before this happened and it eats me up how I'll be near her but not be able to speak to her at all.

Desperstion makes us do crazy things, OP. I logged into one of my ex's emails (we had each others pw's to pretty much everything, she would log into my myspace and change background settings, that sort of thing) but I logged in after she broke up with me and a bit before, because her attitude had changed so drastically. I thought she had either A. found someone else B. had a chemical imbalance due to her taking contraceltive meds, or C. started talking to her close guy friend, who at this point was single again. Needless to say, I felt like absolute shit and did discover she had been emailing some guy, the extent of their knowing each other though was beyond me. Long story short, she didn't tell me shit, had to get the truth from yet another guy who was hitting on her - about a year AFTER she left (very week she dumped me she started seeing some other guy). My knew I was right about something.. you just know when you love someone, something changed.

What I did was wrong though, and I regret it to this day. Felt like shit really.. told all my close online friends because my head couldn't deal with my error anymore. Desperation only makes things worse.

>>17889749
You still talk to her?