Ok, /adv/. I have two questions regarding to dating. 1. How

Shameless bump.

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>Oh, I really love how Lovecraft builds this tension and fear of the unknown in "The shadow over Insmouth", you know?

Female here. I like horror books too. My sister loves the fuck out of Lovecraft. So do many females.

>>17873411

Where do I find girls like you?

>>17873348

> 90% of the women I meet share NOTHING in common with me and the 10% left aren't physically atractive.

I meant to say that MOST of the 10% left are not physically atractive to me or are taken.

>>17873431
>Where do I find girls like you?

Fuck if I know, I never leave the house. Just letting you know that those girls do exist. Meeting someone like my sis, though? Well, she's actually pretty sociable and I guess she gets picked up in all the usual places like bars and stuff.

If you're looking for people who specifically like Lovecraft, I think they've got a "Lovecraftian society" or something out there. It's not like it's a dating app, but networking can be important for meeting any kind of person you want to be on the in with, including potential romantic partners.

Girls into literature also probably hang out at bookstores and cafes.

>>17873452

Lovecraft was just an example, but thanks for the advice, I'll try to talk to girls in bookstores more often.

>>17873452
Anon, this is what I've always concluded. Women with the same interests as us are typically introverts and stay at home like a lot of introverted males.

It's hard to find that nice medium of extroverted people whose personalities go deeper than "I like x reality show haha"

>>17873490

Exactly. It makes it really hard to meet someone with whom I can have a real connection.

So, is there a way to be more funny?

>>17873411
Would you let your boyfriend name the cat "Nigger Man"?

>>17873348

>how to be funny

don't. if you think of a funny joke, go for it, but dont force yourself to be funny. plentmy of women can do without it. its charming at first, annoying later. trust me, it gets frustrating.

>what to talk abbout

try being less ego centric. finding girls who share your interests is great, but for hundreds of years, man and woman shared no interests, yet still managed to get along. even in the recent century when women actually got to choose their husbands, they still managed to like guys who shared nothing in common.

this is why current events are so popular. but if you find a girl who's into you, introducing her into your world is fine.

i go to horror meetups thinking id be the only girl there, but its like 90% girls for some reason. i think it has something to do with girls being the stars of horror films, or easier to scare or something idk.

but what i mean is even if you can't talk about lovecraft you can talk about general horror.

if your response to that kind of advice is simply
>WELL I DONT LIEK THAT

then give up, because what you are looking for is a clone, and your questions flawed if oyu refuse to talk about anything you dont have an extreme interest in.

>>17873628
My boyfriend was the one who told me I'm not allowed to name the cat niggerman.

>>17873348
Dude... Youre making the mistake all fags like you make. They are exactly like men.

You wouldnt have anything in common with over 90% of men you meet either. You also cant walk up to a man and say "hey i really like hp lovecraft and horror stuff" you know that about men so why arent you freaking out about that?
Because its no big fucking deal.

Yes welcome to.life most women wont have shit all in common with you but some will.

And funny you say 90% like that because i never had a problem with women and i had a mutual attraction fling hook up or relationship with... Say.. 1 in 10 of women i met!!!

Thats just how this shit works you just think yoy can set your eye on any woman and be successful.

It comes by meeting in socially relevant situations, having some dumb little thing in common to talk about, or some.mutual experience to share, and building from there. There is exactly one difference between meeting men and women... With women... Sexual tension *might* form. Thats it.

Are we clear?

>>17873640

No, I'm not asking for a clon. I can do just fine with some slightly shared interests.

It sucks that there aren't any horror meetups in my city.

Also, are you sure about what you said on being funny? It almost seems to me as if the guy isn't funny, then the girl will get bored and not be interested.

>>17873485

i highly recommend this. everytime my friend takes me to the book store i go to the manga section and just talk to cute nerds.

we went thrice this year. got numbers twice. only one of them lead to anything serious, but you get the idea.

>>17873529

you'd be surprised how many 'normies' actually have something below the surface. i think a lot of people (especially you) write people off pretty fast.

you say you can't go up to a girl and just talk about lovecraft, but if you did you might find that some girls do. not a lot. not often, but it never hurts to check. and keep checking. and going below the surface.

every once in a while i meet a girl who likes conspiracy theories or board games and we just nerd out.

oh god, one time i saw a girl playing pokemon GO, and im not even reallyi nto pokemon but i know about it cuz everyone knows about it and im like 'when are we going to get a digimon go?'

and she lost it, would not stop talking about her perfect team of digimon she had in digimon world 3 and how she still had the second generaiton digivice.

girl was cute too. if i was single i woulda asked for her number.

>>17873665

ive dated guys who aren't funny.

fun fact, in writing, humor is generally used as a shorthand these days. as in, they are used to fill time when a writer isn't strong enough to keep the story compelling while setting up for the real drama later.

its why comedy seems to be appearing more and more in serious shows these days. its easier to keep someones interest this way.

but there are shows that are straight drama, and dont make heavy use of comedy, and people still watch them.

assuming you are a cohesive person, you can keep someone who actually likes you entertained.

but no anon, there is no magic way to just be more funny.

>>17873682

Okay, you got a point there. Also, I'm not asking for magic, I'm asking if there's a way to "train" myself to be more funny. Practical advice or techniques.

>>17873704

you kinda just copy the formula of other peopels jokes. try to aim high, but if something happens and somethign funny comes to mind, say it.

other then exposing yourself to lots of comedy there isn't anyhting to push that, but even then you might not do anything.

be yourself? its not a meme. it literally only attracts people who are into you, not into a guy putting on a comedy act.

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>>17873644
This raises some good points.

>>17873676

> i think a lot of people (especially you) write people off pretty fast.

This may be true, I'll try fix that. Thanks.

>>17873644

> They are exactly like men.

Oh yeah, that's why there are no girls on careers like CS or electrical engineering but most of the students of architecture or humanistics are girls.

Yeah, they are exactly like men.

>>17873765
OP, this is the reason you don't have a gf. No amount of humor will fix this attitude.

Women don't want to be with people that literally think of them them as a different species. And the ones that do aren't worth dating.

>>17873775

I'm not saying they are a different species, but it is a fact that they are not exactly like men. Thinking otherwise is just delusional.

And no, this is not the reason I don't have a gf. I recently broke up with a relationship that lasted 4 years. And this certainly wasn't the reason we broke up.

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>>17873348

>1. How can I be more funny? I see this is a fundamental skill to attract girls, but I take everything kinda serious

Stop taking yourself so seriously. It sucks. Its boring. Even if you feel like you're not witty enough making an attempt to be funny is better than being a stonefaced cunt.

>What to talk about around women? 90% of the women I meet share NOTHING in common with me and the 10% left aren't physically atractive

The fact that you just told us that you're not compatible with 100% of the women you meet tells me that the problem is with you, not them. You literally just told us that 100% of girls you meet aren't good enough for you. You do realize how autistic that is, right?

>I can't approach a girl and say "Oh, I really love how Lovecraft builds this tension and fear of the unknown in "The shadow over Insmouth", you know?"

Why would you just approach someone and say that? Do you not understand how to build momentum in a conversation? Are you so daft that you're not willing to compromise if someone you meet is 100% into the things that you're into? Do you honestly think that you're so special that NO ONE else knows who Lovecraft is?

Honestly, OP, you seem kind of like a pretentious fuckbag. That may be the source of your problems here.

>>17873793

> Stop taking yourself so seriously. It sucks. Its boring. Even if you feel like you're not witty enough making an attempt to be funny is better than being a stonefaced cunt.

I'll try, thanks.

> The fact that you just told us that you're not compatible with 100% of the women you meet tells me that the problem is with you, not them. You literally just told us that 100% of girls you meet aren't good enough for you. You do realize how autistic that is, right?

No, I'm not saying they aren't good enough, I'm saying that I have issues when trying to have a connection with them.

> Why would you just approach someone and say that? Do you not understand how to build momentum in a conversation? Are you so daft that you're not willing to compromise if someone you meet is 100% into the things that you're into? Do you honestly think that you're so special that NO ONE else knows who Lovecraft is?

I feel like you didn't read my later posts. I'm saying that all I need is some sort of shared interest, I'm not asking for someone who is 100% into the things I'm into.

No, I don't think I'm special for knowing who Lovecraft is. HOWEVER, I'm not american, Lovecraft is much less known here than you probably think.

>>17873832

But as I said, Lovecraft was just an example.

>>17873708

Thanks for the advice.

>>17873348
Poking fun at yourself and keeping a smile or sense of confidence is all i do at bars. Don't roast yourself but for example when a girl asks what do you do i reply with "nothing really" with kind of a smile. This is a go-to question that the people i meet feel like they need to ask but in reality they dont give a flying fuck unless you fly airplanes or make 120k+ salary. 95% of the time i noticed that they get insta-aroused/ interested and become starved for any stupid fact about you.

Another middle game; once an exchange of compliments like "great hair/eyes/pantalones" after i say thanks i roll up my sleeves and hit her with "these arms tho" (my forearms are skinny i am not blessed) and i usually get positive reactions/interactions. Again the key is to have a "but its k" attitude and have a positive expression. I shit you not i am using an example that got me laid.

Lastly my secret weapon; if you find a moment especially accompanied with drinks that you both genuinely laugh at the same time OR all hope is lost and you are all out of fucks to give. Hit them with "wow we should have sex" it needs to come out of nowhere and again you need to just come off as happy and having a good time. Yes this actually will get you positive reactions when you least expect it like from this 15/10 on a night you just wanted to drink or chill.

Other things you can do are playing dumb when she tells you about work or hobby. It takes practice but you can pull off being funny and cute because you never heard of lovecraft. "Are they love stories like a walk to remember"

Summing up being funny can just mean making light of a situation. Do not seek the best jokes or mannerisms to practice because trying hard gives off an awful scent that could make you never want to hear the joke again.

>>17874090

This is great advice, man. Thanks!

>>17873348
there are a few ways to come across as more funny. you can start saying everything that comes into your head and try to be funny, and even though you'll annoy people and only 1% of what you say will be funny, some people will just think you're funny (they won't be funny people).

you can also (in your thoughts) start focusing on how absurd everything is, and how nothing really matters. when you start thinking like this all the time, it's easier to disconnect from a situation and see it from a perspective that lends itself well to humor. like if you are having trouble talking on your first date, you can immediately make a comment like "oh no, twenty minutes into our first date and we've already lost momentum, quick, let's find something to hate together". it's a matter of being aware of what's going on, and peeking behind the curtain or masks that we put up to stop from feeling awkward. if you lean into the awkwardness it can be funny.

there are some rules to follow. don't harp on a subject. things aren't funny for very long. you want to leave a subject on a high note, not run it into the ground. if you say something and it was funny, enjoy that moment and change the subject or keep talking/asking but not in a funny way. this is harder than it sounds but restraint comes with practice.

don't try too hard to come up with funny stuff to say, just wait for something to pop into your head and say it. you'll probably offend some people and say some really stupid shit, but that's the cost of business if you're trying to be funny.

don't expect anything you say to make anyone laugh or be funny in the slightest. most of the things you say won't be funny, but some of them will be. the others will at least be interesting, insightful, or at the very least keeping the conversation alive. nobody wants to be laughing the whole time they're talking to you anyway. if you get one or two laughs the whole night, they see you as a funny person.

>>17873348
as far as what to talk about, don't fall into the trap of thinking you have nothing in common with most people. you might not share the same specific interests, but the way you feel about horror books is the way she feels about something. we all tend to have very similar journeys and experiences in life, we're very much in the same boat. we have ups and downs and likes/dislikes, the fact that there are different things that do that to us is what makes us interesting. so talk about your love of horror books--not as a conversation starter but when it gets to be about what you like. understand that she has passions too, even if they seem like wastes of time to you (and they would be, if you were to do them). i guess the bottom line is realize that she's more like you than you'll ever really understand, and so is everyone else, and if you're genuinely interested in the things that make them different then they will often develop a similar interest in you.

but think of relationships like a fire. you start a conversation very small and meaningless, and slowly build and build to more meaningful things. if you try to go too deep too soon (like when you're first meeting) you'll probably just put out the fire.

>>17874136
>>17874166

That was eye-opening, man. I'll try to put some of this in practice. Thanks!

>>17873792
Im the guy you replied too.
Im a carpenter. We have plenty fo women on the site. And they can swing a hammer just as good as the men do, and their sailor talk is on par too.

The issue is they arent taught they can. Gender roles are natural yet cultural. Children are looking around and seeing how they fit in. If little girls dont see many construction women, they dont work construction. Simple psychology for you. My brother in law is also a major in the CAF. It was his honour to serve with the women under his command overseas.

Dont come at me with that mysoginostic bullshit because the other anon is right. This is why you dont have a girlfriend. Because you treat women like another species.

I wanted to help you but nah.. Fuck you. Be lonely and bitter faggot.

>>17874622

> And they can swing a hammer just as good as the men do
> and their sailor talk is on par too.

Great! Unfortunately this aren't valid reasons to say that they're exactly like men. It is no surprise that they can do manly things.

> Men tipically do this.
> Women can also do this.
> They are the same.
Please study some logic before making this kind of statements. It takes just one little difference to say that they are different as a fact.

Men and women are different biologically and culturally. Do you really think that as a man you can relate to having the period? Do you really think that women can relate to having a dick? Do you really think you can relate to having much less testosterone?. And don't get me started with cultural diferences.

> The issue is they arent taught they can. Gender roles are natural yet cultural. Children are looking around and seeing how they fit in. If little girls dont see many construction women, they dont work construction.

I know that. But I'm not discussing the "what ifs", we live in reality and cultural gender roles are a reality. Would a world be a better place if cultural gender roles didn't exist? Probably.

> It was his honour to serve with the women under his command overseas.

Again. Wow, a woman doing manly things. I'm not saying this is imposible. Even if they are doing the same thing. How can you be so sure in the way they feel? You say that they feel things exactly like men as long as they can are doing the same thing?
And you know this is not the majority of women. My point was that most females aren't like this, so you pointing out an exception is pretty irrelevant.

> Dont come at me with that mysoginostic bullshit because the other anon is right.

So the fact that I'm saying that women and men are different is enough for me to hate on women.

You're a retard.

> This is why you dont have a girlfriend. Because you treat women like another species.

I've already mentioned that I've had a girlfriend.

>>17874846

> I wanted to help you but nah.. Fuck you. Be lonely and bitter faggot.

Oh c'mon, other anons did help, you didn't.

Maybe you wouldn't have this problem if you hadn't cheated on me! Ahahahaha

>>17873792
Sounds like you have assburgers

>>17874854
>other anons did help
>other anons told me what I wanted to hear
Ahh, classic /adv/ for you.

>>17875150

> other anons told you what you wanted to hear
> it's not that others are really more helpful even if they critiqued you in a constructive way.
> it's not like my advice is utter bullshit.

Ahh, classic autism for you.

>>17873411
"Oh, I really love how Lovecraft builds this tension and fear of the unknown in "The shadow over Insmouth", you know?"

That sounds perfectly conversational.