Adopted at birth. At 30 get a call birth father has been looking

>>17852129
That the cutest teddy doggo I've ever seen, 10/10 would cuddle all day. Please post pictures of the others.

Tell him you understand that he's excited to have found you, but he's still a complete stranger to you and you need time to get comfortable with the idea that your biological father is suddenly trying to become part of your life.

Also, have some empathy, even if it's hard.

>>17852163
Well he makes it difficult to talk. He is one of those
People that sort of talks a lot
And doesn't need a reply and I am a much more passive person that tries to give subtle
Hints.


I don't know how to jump
Right out and say paternity test. Last time he was here he invited us to his house for dinner and my husband gave him this no way look and he was like "oh too soon?" Yet here he is stopping by today "with a special gift"


What empathy????
I was given away at
Birth and another man raised me. This guy will never be my father. He has his own kids.

your husband is a retard
ofcourse you want your real father, thats why you want to see him
not to know how he looks, photos are for that

maybe you stupid women shouldnt lie to us and go with the bullshit we invent to satisfy your stupid ass, because you arent, you just pretend

>>17852170
>I am a much more passive person that tries to give subtle Hints.
I'm afraid that's not gonna work in this case, you somehow need to make him listen to your point of view. Maybe have your husband talk to him, if you really can't leave your comfort zone.

What would a paternity test change really? I guess you're hoping and praying for a negative result.

>What empathy????
Do you know why you were given away? He might have lived in regret for 30 years.

Also, more teddy pictures, please.

>>17852129
>>17852192
>you really said yes to meet him because you wanted to know what he looks like and your genetic background, not to try to have a relationship with him as a father.

I honestly don't believe that's true. Your have to accept this man into your life I struggle to believe that seriously where your feeling start and finish.

Biological parents could not take care of you, so they gave you to some one who could. Now that you are grown, biological parent wants to see how far you've come along. Perhaps he did not want to give you away, but your mother did.

Have some empathy. Lend an ear to listen to him. Stop being a cunt. And this is coming from another woman. Some parents just can't take care of a child and regrettably adopt them out.

Would you rather have been aborted? No? Then be thankful your parents chose life for you

Op you might be the biggest cunt I know. I'd wish for you to kill yourself, but I don't want to put your bio dad through even more torment

I think you're totally entitled to deny people a place in your life/family if you wish so. I think you should have a serious talk and mention the paternity test, but also explain that the "dad position" is already taken in your life, and that you'd appreciate a less intrusive behaviour.

This is obviously if that's what you feel, which is the impression I get from your post. I don't understand why people are all against you without even knowing the situation he was in when he gave you away. Good luck.

>>17852683
Because she's literally doing the same thing. She does NOT know the situation her father has been in. For all she knows, this could have been what he thought was best and quite honestly, having a husband and kids I'd say it was a good call on his part.

Why don't you at least listen to his story and judge him then? See if he's been a bum or if he's been hard at work or something. I'm trying to see it from both sides, and wow it's tough not to pity the father if nobody knows details

>>17852129
>How do I get this guy to step back

you're right that guy who is claiming to be your "father" is acting totally creepy

>>17852163

if this doesn't work call the police & get a restraining order

>>17852746
>call the police & get a restraining order
Restraining order against the person who gifted you with the miracle of life and has potentially lived in pain over not being able to be there for you for 30 years and just now found you and wants to make up for the lost time.

Entitled soulless American women everyone!

File: 16532.jpg (76KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

76KB, 500x500px

>>17852129
OP don't listen to the idiots in this thread. if you were a boy and it was your bio mother who gave you away they would be calling her a cunt and a slut.
Your feelings towards him are completely understandable. I understand this must be a difficult situation. He really wants to meet you but listing himself as your father on facebook was a bit too straightforward.. Meet him, ask him questions, listen to his story, and then decide what to do. Try to understand him, don't be too hard with your feelings but stand your ground. best wishes.

>>17852772
>if you were a boy and it was your bio mother who gave you away they would be calling her a cunt and a slut
This isn't /r9k/ you sexist shitcunt.

>>17852696
Nobody is entitled to having a place in your life if you don't want them to. If she gets a weird feeling, doesn't like him, doesn't like his approach OR ANYTHING, it's her right to shut him down.

Now, personally I think I'd try to know a bit more about him, but if she doesn't feel like it, that's fine as well.

>>17852129
Tell him exactly that
He forfeited the right to be your father when he gave you up for adoption. That right is from the man who raised you.
He is just a sperm donor, that is all.

>>17852601
She's not the cunt here. He made the choice to give his daughter away and only try to make contact 30 years afterwards. His "torment" is his own fault. He should have thought about the consequences his actions have on others. How is OP in the wrong in this situation? She doesn't even know the guy. It'd be one thing if she refused to let him in at all but she's willing to let him in. He just needs to know his place in this situation and the kind of pain he could have put her though

>>17853235
>He made the choice to give his daughter away and only try to make contact 30 years afterwards.
Unfair and rude without knowing his circumstances.

Think about how my dad who adopted me feels. He took me in and raised me and
Now someone who did no work wants to come in and steal me away.


The dad claims that my birth mom got mad at him after he had her arrested and the birth was hidden from him and she gave me up for adoption. It sounds like she was sleeping with many men when she got pregnant so I am
Not sure why he is convinced he is the father.

>>17853511
>steal me away
Wew lad.

fuck your dad. he conveniently wants in after all the hard stuff has been done? he didnt give a fuck about your elementray school graduation, middle school graduation, high school graduation, college graduation if applicable, first OR second childs birth, your mariage, every single birthday, thanksgiving, christmas, etc. tell that fuck bag to eat shit. he had plenty of chances to give a fuck but its apparently not enough to overcome the inconviences that come with taking responsiblity.

>>17853820

>>17852129
>father has been looking for me for long time
Has it ever occured to you that he might not have done it out of convenience?

>>17853847
>Lists himself as my father on Facebook
>The Facebook website was launched on February 4, 2004

he was really on the hunt wasnt he

File: HURRR!.jpg (89KB, 600x454px) Image search: [Google]

89KB, 600x454px

>>17853886

>>17853820
This

>>17853511
>Think about how my dad who adopted me feels. He took me in and raised me and
>Now someone who did no work wants to come in and steal me away.

Refusing to see or acknowledge him becuase your feel it's disrespectful to your father is understandable. It's also incredibly unhealthy and moronic.

>>17852129

id hear him out and see waht could develop.

why were you adopted? it wasn't a step father situation.

id give him a chance and talk it out. im not sying commit to being his daughter but in my experience you can have more than one father.

your birth father doesn't have to compromise your relationship with your adopted father. but you can get to know him and understand why he left and have a different bodn with him maybe,

>>17853511
This is one reason why I will never ever get with a single mother.

You could be the world's best father to this kid but in the end he'll still brush you aside for his deadbeat biological father

up