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Alright /adv/, so, my story:
I will be at a family holiday gathering two weeks from tomorrow. My estranged son will also be there. About three years ago, I hired him to work for me, which lasted for about nine months. He had a number of disputes with another employee, and quit when I took the other employee's side. This spring, multiple other employees admitted they'd had similar problems with the same employee, and corroborated my son's account. I have since fired the other employee, but by then my son had long since moved to a different job in another city. He has not spoken to me in almost two years, and does not answer his phone or return my calls.
What can I do to get things between us back to normal, or at least make them better? I don't know when or if I will get another chance if this time doesn't work.
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"sorry i didnt take your side, everyone else confirmed that the other person was a shit cunt, and i ended up firing him. what can i do to make it up to you, son?"
are you so brain dead you cant work out what to say?
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Just admit you were wrong.
Tell him what happened and try to reconcile with him.
Expect to get chewed out or maybe a swing.
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>>17837258
I've tried telling him this, and he has never responded to me before. I'm not very certain that he will start now.
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Shameless self-bump.
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>>17836798
You made this thread two days ago, and I'll tell you the same thing.
Hire an escort for him.
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What exactly did you say to him when you tried to contact him before? It might not have been enough if you didn't acknowledge that you trusted an outsider over your family. He might've felt betrayed, especially if that was a pattern with you. He might feel like you'd do it again. If you can show understanding of how he must feel and let him know you want the chance to show you can be a supportive parent with your actions from now on, he might feel better about reconnecting.
You might try writing a letter to give him at the gathering if you think he won't give you a chance to talk to him one on one. Good luck.
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>>17838714
I told him that I had fired the other guy, and that I was sorry if he felt he wasn't being heard or taken seriously. I said that while I understood this didn't do anything to help him, he could at least know that other people would be spared the same problems he had had to put up with. He never wrote me back, but according to my wife, he read the email and told her something to the effect of "look who finally decided to be a competent professional."
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>>17838814
That'd be an appropriate response if he was just an employee that quit. But it's so impersonal that I had to reread your OP to make sure he's your son. Your business is important, but during and after this incident, it sounds like you valued your business over your family. It would be nice if you could talk to him on a more father and son level and say you miss having him in your life and want to regain his trust in whatever way you can.
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>>17838814
> sorry if he felt
This is an insincere apology. You apologized on behalf of his feelings.
Guess what? His feelings were't in the wrong. You were.
This is what a good apology looks like:
>I am sorry. I did ____ and it was wrong.
>I am now aware that the damage I caused is ____
>I will repair this damage by ______
Anything short of that is a cop out. It's an insincere "professionalism". If you want anything more than insincere politeness from your son, step up and make a real apology.
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