I posted here a few years back because then boyfriend never wanted

BMP, please.

>>17834863
Find someone that's sexually compatible with you

You really wanna live the rest of your life only getting dick every 2 weeks?

I know you scared your eggs drying up but damn woman u ain't gotta put up with that

Sex is important in a healthy relationship and seducing him is just not gonna work in the long run

Wanting sex less will lead to you wanting to cheat and then feel guilty about it

Rejection is based off who he is, if he had a super model it might be once a week but still he just doesn't seem to want sex as much as most guys and that's OK for some girl out there I'm sure but I wouldn't settle if I were you

1. You're sexually incompatible. If you're as in shape as you say you are most men would have no problem having sex with you as often as you're suggesting
2. Impossible
3. Not gonna happen because he is rejecting you personally.

Might just be incompatibility. My wife only wants sex like once every two weeks but we compromise on once or twice a week, she just puts up with it rather than wanting it.

To be honest there are quite a lot of times I wish I was with someone who enjoyed sex as much as I do.

>>17834863
> it would be so nice to just spend a day in bed, and we never do that. And he hates the idea, he says it would be a complete waste of time.

> a complete waste of time

Please just find someone with a similar sex drive.
I'm in the same situation, opposite sexes, coming to the realization that I should probably move on.
Trying to change your partner is the only complete waste of time. If your partner isn't invested in meeting your needs, start looking for one who is.

Everyone: let's just assume I am not going to leave him, anything I can do within that framework?

Bearing in mind the only thing you know about the relationship is exactly the thing that is broken, so I can totally understand how from that perspective the entire thing would look broken.


>>17834910
from what I have read it is pretty common for the man in the relationship to have more of a sex drive. If only one thing in the relationship is broken I wouldn't give up on it, especially if I was the man, because you might just go out of the frying pan and into the fire.

But if other stuff is wrong too.. I don't know, maybe sex is a barometer for everything else.

>>17834922
Have you explained how frustrated you are?

Oh god though it would be so nice to be sexually fulfilled once in my life. Once!

Slip Viagra in his drink.

>>17834922
Unless he changes through will, you're fucked (IRONY)

>>17834926
yeah it always leads to arguments.

He feels like I am saying he is not a real man. I never said anything like that, of course, but that's how it makes him feel.

I tried to explain that I feel rejected and unattractive and sexually frustrated (masturbation is not the same). He says that someone who wanted to have sex as much as I am talking about would be sex-crazed and the very person who I couldn't trust not to cheat on me.

>>17834936
Sounds like you s.o. is nuts.

>>17834936
Then it's not going to work unless there's a compromise like >>17834908.

>>17834863
I was on the opposite side of this one before. 4 year relationship. He always wanted sex, and I didn't. The truth is, I stopped wanting to have sex with him because he was a dick to me all the time. You can only say so much mean shit to your partner before they don't want to fuck you anymore. Consider this: do you nag his ass? Are you a bitch to him sometimes? Is he falling out of love with you because of something you did to him? Because if so, it's not repairable.

>>17834936
Me and my exe would bang every other day and I wanted it every day. My testosterone levels are high I guess lolll

>>17834942
sex as a barrometer! maybe.If there is something wrong he hasn't told me about it.
He has 0 nag tolerance. I'd really like him to shower more and eat less beef but i know better than to say those things. I mentioned "no meat Monday" in passing once and he got so mad! ha ha.


I am super neurotic and it is easy to hurt my feelings.I am trying to be more relaxed but it's possible I have him on edge all the time.

He seemed so into me when we first started going out,I thought this was going to be a really sexy relationship. Maybe I just drive people away

>>17834967
If you're as neurotic as you say, it's extremely likely that he's in a state of annoyance with you and doesn't want to fuck you because of that. I know with my guy, he was always batching at me for laying down when I got home from work, for drinking, for hanging out with my friends, for just being my normal lazy POS self that I wanted to be. I didn't try to fix the relationship, but if we did, it would have started with him cutting all that shit out. Maybe you should look for clues on what you're doing wrong. Does he ever seem especially annoyed with you? Is it like pretty much all the time? Tbh idk how to fix that kind of mess, I just left.

>>17834987
nah normally when he is annoyed it is because of work or something. like he will come home annoyed and then whatever I do, including trying to stay out of the way, I make it worse. But if he is in a good mood i don't seem to bring it down except by being depressed or something.

>>17834996
>except by being depressed or something

IDK man, think what you want, but the truth is you're probably driving him away somehow, thus turning him the fuck off.

>>17835013
maybe. i know i would have driven you away, your lifestyle sounds so laid back I couldn''t stand it ha ha. yeah i think you are right, it is probably me he is sick of, not sex

But he still says he loves me and he still wants to cuddle etc.

>>17834910

Basically this. It'll only get worse as he gets more comfortable.
Guys with low drive are great for women that like to use sex as leverage but for people that want a healthy fun sex life it's a waste of time. Do what makes you happy. If you like him enough to give up sex, go for it.

>>17834922
>maybe sex is a barometer for everything else
It isn't. His response to your concerns is.

> If only one thing in the relationship is broken I wouldn't give up on it
If only one thing in the relationship isn't working, you come to your partner and say
>this is the ONLY thing about our relationship that isn't working, and it's a big deal for me
and his response is essentially
>I don't really care. Your position isn't really reasonable. If you want something different, you figure it out
What does that tell you?

>>17835030
i like him enough to give up sex. i like sex enough to try very hard to find some way to make him want it.

he says he hardly slept with his ex either, but he's had relationships in the past where he got to have sex all the time, and i've never had that in my life, so I appreciate maybe he got it out of his system but I wish I had a chance to as well

>>17835040
ouch
that's a really good point

>>17835041

I used to think like you but now its been a year without so I'm trying to figure out the best way to leave without him freaking out. If your dissatisfied, don't wait. It'll only be harder to leave

>>17835068
a year without sex? while in a relationship? I mean I have been many years without sex... but not while hanging out with someone I care about, that would be agony. Your poor yearning organs :(

>>17834863
You need to act sexy to be sexy.
Maybe he feels like he is putting in more work. I am 30 and just had my second kid but this time instead of asking to snuggle or slouching around I engaged in sex as soon as I felt able because that way he is happy and we have a balanced family life.
I see he tries in so many ways to please me and I respect that and I know he gets boners and likes to play around and have fun.

So for his sake I force myself to lighten up and I end up actually having fun and having a good time with him.

>>17835118
putting in more work? He never initiates. What kind of work should I put in?

>>17834863
You should hang out with me! I'm your age and sexually frustrated in a relationship. You sound awesome!

>>17834863
you need to find someone that is inherently sexually compatible with you
trust me, i have had this dilemma for years. as soon as the frequency of sex begins to decline, i leave. im not going to stick around when i feel unwanted, and im not going to waste time trying to change someone or trying to get them to do something they clearly dont want to do. it sucks, but this is the way of things in my experience

>>17835385
lol i love my guy though!

>>17835415
Well damn! He needs to wake up.

I have a high sex drive so I can relate. You can't just ignore it. I tried that before and I was miserable. Like you said, porn and getting yourself off only go so far...

think i am going to get lucky tonight. good night everyone and thanks for the advice

>>17835079

Yeah it's one of those situations where i know I'll move on fine but he definitely won't. Fml. Dont be me