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Hey, I need of some advice/perspective here.
I've been in a relationship for about 2 and a half years now (I'm 23, she's 20), we're young, very close, we talk openly about anything and everything, and we've always had a high sex drive.
I'll try to keep it short: We're into bdsm and she's into being submissive, I buy her toys, etc... Which I think is healthy for our relationship.
She had just turned 18 when we started dating, from a really small town, outback, and I couldn't keep away this thought that maybe we started dating too soon, and that I robbed her of experiencing being single, as in getting to fuck other guys.
We're very happy, affective, she can't sleep unless we're cuddling, we are very emotionally dependent on each other and I don't have any plans to leave her. As much as we enjoy playing sub/dom, I've never restricted her of anything that would impact her social or personal life, as it should be.
About 3 months ago, I started to notice she was talking a lot about/to a guy she met.
I knew from the start this wasn't a typical "new friend" situation, she was talking to him a LOT, like waking up in the middle of the night to reply to his texts.
I know it was shitty of me doing this, but after a few days, jealousy got the best of me, but not only jealousy, the main impulse was curiosity.
I got her phone while she slept and found out she was sexting with this guy, and already had plans of meeting him.
She woke up, we talked about it for hours, she "was going to tell me but didn't know how"... She apologized a lot, cried a lot, and I know her well enough to know it was sincere regret.
They hadn't done anything yet, but I still felt betrayed. Not because of the sexting, but because she did it behind my back.
Once we talked it through, already in the morning, she got her phone to delete his number and, unfuckingbelievaly, I stop her.
Cont.
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>>17820372
I still don't how to feel about this decision, but it was a selfless one, I wasn't getting anything out of this, just giving her the chance to enjoy herself.
The first time they fuck, I basically guided her on what to do (via instant msg) because she literally didn't know what to say, and the dude is also very shy.
She gets home the next day and tells me everything that happened, we fuck for the rest of the day.
She went out with him one more time after that. They still talk.
The problem is now that it happened, I don't know how to feel about it, and I don't know where I stand in our relationship now.
I feel good that she gets enjoyment out of it. And I feel like a delusional cunt trying to convince myself that I'm not a cuck.
I have nobody to talk about this, I've written too much already, and it feels like I could use the help of anonymous strangers.
TL;DR
I let my girlfriend fuck another guy and realized non-monogamy is fucking hard.
What do I do to not feel like I've ruined our relationship?
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>>17820372
>>17820377
I didn't know there was a character limit (or that I had written so much). Had to split it in two.
I'll be here to answer questions, etc.
Also, bump.
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>>17820377
You feel like you ruined it because you did.
You can either talk to her to get her to stop seeing that guy or anybody else again but obviously the damage has been done to you.
Id say break up, but you know your relationship more than me.
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>She tried monogamy, I didn't I don't like it
Yes, anon you are kind of a cuck.
I would say get out of there, at this point you won't feel comfortable in the relationship ever again unless you go full cuck or you start practicing poligamy too, and that's only going to set you farther apart.
She fucked up but you fucked up when you allowed her go too far, it's over anon, the faster you get out of there the better.
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>>17820372
When a cuck cucks himself. Hilarious
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>>17820399
Yeah, I already kind of knew that.
She wants me to fuck other girls too, which didn't happen yet. And as you said, I feel it would push us further apart.
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>>17820439
Feels bad man, the fact that she's a sub just makes it worse, it was a red flag from the beggining.
Just cut it, it's for the better.
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bumping for interest
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>>17820444
>nice trips
Feels awful. What feels the worse is that I'm the one who encouraged it, and breaking up with her right know would be 100% a dick move. I got her into this.
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>>17820372
>>17820377
Wanna hear some female opinions on this.
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OP here.
Some maybe relevant info:
>She's still a sub, if I tell her to stop, she'll stop.
>I've never talked to the guy, but she occasionally wants me to read their conversations so I can advise her on something
>She doesn't know that I'm uncomfortable with the situation, and if she knew she would stop.
>I don't want her to stop because of me, she's clearly enjoying herself. (kind of the whole point of the thread here)
>I don't feel humiliated or intimidated by the other guy in any way
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