How do you deal with being ugly? Or it's not even that I'm

>>17807729
I hide the pain with memes and anime. But I'm not insecure, and you sound super insecure. I'm not so I have no idea how to get over it. I guess all you can do is work on yourself and make good things happen for yourself until you realize you're not the piece of shit you think you are, because I bet you're not.

btw the entire concept of 'first choices' is pretty bullshit because it's not like people pick and choose off a menu, they have an array of people around them and they end up attracted to one another pretty much by chance. I guarantee no woman you know sits in bed at night weighing the pros and cons of you versus your male friends.

I also am willing to bet that right now as we speak there is a woman you know who thinks you're handsome and would totally date you if she thought you were interested.I also know for a fact that when you're out doing errands at least a few strangers you walk past think you are good looking. How will you know unless you get over yourself and make these things known? Instead of isolating yourself, just stop caring and ask someone out

It's really not that big of a deal

>>17807745
>It's really not that big of a deal
I know it's not, I know the whole thing most likely sounds really stupid. I know I shouldn't be thinking this way and I know that the things you said are probably all true. It's that I only know it, I just don't FEEL it.

I started working out an year ago and I'm already in better shape than probably 80% of the people I see. My issue is reflecting on that too tho, I'm only able to see the top 20% and compare myself to them.

Same issue here, though I'm married and have gotten to the point I'm suicidal over it.

I wish I could give some sort of answer. I've started working out, dressing better, and overall taking better care of myself. But all I see when I look at myself is garbage.

>>17807729

go to the mall and look at all the couples adn you'll find that a lot of people are genuinely happy together despite there being a disparity in looks.

looks are what bring someone to you sure, but waht you have inside decides wehther its just a lay or something real.

so you may be average. and only average girls will take a look to see what you're made of. that makes you not their first choice physically, sure. but it doesn't change how they feel about those insides.

as cheesy as it sounds, its true. I've been on both ends of the settler and the reacher dynamic. recently i was the 'settler'. i dated a guy who wasn't super duper hot (though he had a nice body). he was kind of a 'rough cute' you could call it. grew up on a farm and you could see it in his damaged skin. he walked around like a retard, total nerd.

but below that surface was something really fucking sweet, and even when i think about the retarded way he walked icant help but miss him. just remembering the way he said 'HI CHRISTINA' in his dumb fucking accent makes me smile.

i wish he didn't go back to brazil

>>17807837
>fit outdoorsy handsome guy isn't good enough

hoooooly shit. if that's what you call settling then OP might be right

Visit Lookism.net. It will make you feel much better about life.

>>17807847

>outdoorsy

i never said he was outdoorsy. he grew up on a farm. doesnt stop him from being a computer nerd.

>handsome

i literally never said he was handsome. he was 'rough cute'. like when you see an ugly dog and think its cute. its kind of like that.

>fit

he worked out and had some muscle, i wouldnt call him 'fit' like he didnt have abs or anything. nice arms and pecs but thats it really. yes it may be more than you have, but he worked out like an hour every other day, if thats out of your reach than maybe girls or boys are right not to settle for ya?

why are you projecting all these things i DIDNT say on to him?

and again, settling is based on what your attraction level is. you can't say 'THATS SETTLING?' when you dont know what I look like. for all you know im an insanely hot super model. and even if im not, i was more attractive than the guy i was dating by a long shot. like embarassed to introduce him to my friends cuz he walks around like a velociraptor with his hands in the air and wears dorky jean shorts.

still loved him to death tho.

>>17807851
I can confirm. I was just there for 30 seconds and I suddenly feel allot better about myself. I might be ugly but at least I'm not as mentally damaged as those folks seem.

I'm ugly as fuck, but honestly, if something is to blame for me being always alone is my cowardliness and insecurity. This is so much worse than being ugly.

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>>17807856

>tfw sub-optimal maxillary protrusion
>tfw heavily lacking in dimorphism
>tfw poor zygomatic width
>tfw wristcel, neckcel, skullcel, framecel

IT'S OGRE

You could do something about it.
For example if your bodys out of shape join a gym.
You may not even be ugly, I thought I was joined one of those "hot or not" style of sites and turned out the woman thought I was hot.

You may find similar to me.

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I have the same issue OP.
I am a girl so it actually feels way more intense: at least in case of guys charisma, wealth, sense of humor are considered good substitutes for looks. For women there is no such thing- your beauty matters the most.

I know I will never be someones first choice and honestly it made me want to give up on pursuing relationships all together. I just dont see the point.

Guys are never interested anyway and unlike >>17807745 said, I can literally see how I am their last choice (for example when they start hitting on girls at parties).

Honestly I would say you should focus on having good career and interesting life.

Glad to hear that I'm not the only one with this problem

>>17807899
>parties
how degenerate :^)

I recently found out I'm good looking, but I'm boring as hell, anti social, and don't easily find my self attracted to people. How do I decide to go for one person, or find someone I'm interested in? I'm trying online but I'm talking to too many girls, I'm not able to keep multiple conversations going.

>>17807936
>implying parties are anything more than glorified talking over few beers

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Okay OP, it boils down to 3 types of people:

>LOOKS/HEIGHT/FRAME/MONEY/STATUS NOTHING ELSE MATTERS NOW COME JOIN ME ON SLUTHATE AND LOOKISM SO WE CAN COPE TOGETHER BRO

>Only game matters xD neg that 7.23/10 girl, but only once you have you've initiated attraction stage 1.672 and threw in 2.5 DHV spikes and 1.83 time constraints :P xDdDD

> Looks matter to a degree, but game is most important. If you look retarded, you will not be taken seriously. Having said that, your social skills are the most important pillar of seductive success.

Out of those 3, which one do you feel is most rational? Be very cautious of the endless hordes of insecure men on this site that will drag you into category 1. I have decent success with women, but even I get into the negative mindset of option 1 when I don't leave my house and spend too much time on here. get out of the fucking house and polish your skills, right fucking now. We're all gonna make it.

>>17807899
But anon I bet you're still pretty cute and guys are into you, you just might not notice. The nasty thing about these thoughts is that they are hard to take as fantasy, and stop you from facing reality. Some people really are ugly, but most folks are not, and just think they are. I think it's easy to fall into that pattern of thinking after a long string of rejections or pseudo rejections.

>>17807943
Strange because when I talk to people over beers I would not call it a party, and it's never been in a setting where strangers gather to hunt members of the opposite sex.

But maybe I'm just a square :^)

>>17807899
Believe it or not, confidence really affects women too. I can't tell you how many times a 6/10 was cocky as fuck talking to me, and my brain registered her as a hot chick. Pretty much every dude would slam any girl unless she has some sort of birth defect.

>>17807945

COPE

>>17807958
I'm the opposite. I really prefer quiet/shy women. They just don't prefer me.

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>>17807899
>I am a girl so it actually feels way more intense

>>17807966
>implying thots aren't walking bags of insecurity covered in makeup desperately trying to fill the void in their hearts

I spent about a month obsessively posting on Lookism earlier this year. I literally, literally, began to lose touch with reality and developed major depression and paranoia. Thank fuck I got my shit together and got out of there as well as flushing my SH account.

I always thought 4chan, and specifically /r9k/, was the most pathetic gathering of incels on the internet. I was wrong.

I'm handsome and I'm autismo, It's the same as if I were ugly. We are on the same boat OP, don't limit yourself because of looks.

>>17807963

> That girl was disgusted because I'm not a 10/10 chad
> Has nothing to do with the fact that I'm a mouthbreathing autist that approached her in stained sweatpants and a starwars tank top while stuttering "whats up baby"

>>17807975

Cope.

Mew more.

why don't all the autists date other autists, and the uggos date other uggos?

what's causing this disconnect?

>>17807975
>that girl was disgusted because I'm not a 7/10 normie
ftfy

chicks aren't that retarded usually

>>17807979
You missed my sarcasm entirely. I understand that as long as you aren't totally fucked up looking you're fine.

>>17807982
sorry, it's hard to tell sarcasm when you're skating too close to reality. there are guys who think that because their unemployed, bad hygiene self can't get a gf is because they aren't some unattainable adonis

>>17807973
Probably the most attractive guy in my high school class had zero personality whatsoever. He still got any girl he wanted.
>>17807729
I'm in the same position OP. Are you in college?
I feel like my insecurity about my looks has gotten so much worse in college.
I'm average looking, and I see plenty of guys less attractive than me, but like most of them seem/are weird and don't seem to care much about girls.
Then I see any guy more attractive than I am and think I'd just do anything to be a little bit more attractive. I don't know if it's because I feel like girls are more shallow in college and care more about looks than personality?

>>17807979
Even autistic, uggo girls can score an average guy. Not so much the other way around.

>>17807988
Zero personality does not mean spilling spaghetti

>>17807951
There really aren't- I remember even every compliment I got during past years, thats how little there were.
You obviously never been to central european parties.

>>17807958
I am actually quite confident irl, have no problem with approaching people.
I even did approaching guys when I was younger and more stupid.
I only felt worse afterwards, having to beg for what my friends would get for free.
And most guys were neutral towards me approching anyway and would continue pursuing hotties they were into.

There's this girl I really like and I wanna ask her out but i'v seen her ex and he looks way better than me and I'm already insecure is it a bad idea?

>>17807990
Unfortunately, matchmaking is unequal, women fuck upwards, guys fuck down since the vag has more market value than dick

>>17807994
True, I've never been to EE.
>I remember every compliment...

Maybe things are different where you live, but around here men giving unsolicited compliments is a big no-no. Hell, even complimenting someone you know is usually a bad idea. I only ever complimented the women I was sleeping with, so don't put too much stock in that.

fwiw I've never gotten any compliments either.

>>17807995
The worst that can happen is she says no and nothing changes.

But she might say yes, in which case things can get much much worse :^)

>>17807987
All good brother.Or an "incel" as they say. There's no self responsibility nowadays.

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GET THE FUCK OVER IT.

>>17807988
OP here. Yep, last year of college, I'm 19. I don't have trouble making friends with girls in my college, I get along with everyone pretty well and have a pretty good sense of humour (based on my experience of seeing people laugh at my jokes enjoy my presence in general)
I just never think of anyone as anything more than just a friend because I feel inferior to them because of my poor self image. I know it sounds dumb but I don't know how to get the thought out of my head.

>>17808007
Guys do compliment girls here casually. I also remember every time I was approached at parties, clubs etc (usually with majority of guys) during last 5 years and can count them on one hand.

>>17808034
Sorry anon.

I hope someone sweeps you off your feet

>>17807729
>Much ugly wat do?
There is no cure for being UGLY you should consider doing sudoku and an hero.