To the married or divorced anons; have you ever been constantly

Currently getting a divorce. Will finally be over in January.

He lied about seeing another woman and constantly lied about where all his money went. I would always have to end up covering all the bills since he would be constantly broke somehow. I wanted to be a wife, not his mother, and no one deserves to be fed constant lies.

He had two kids from his previous relationship, but we had none together. Kids or not, getting divorced is the best choice. At least try counciling first of you want to try and mend it.

>>17794713
Im sorry for what you had to go through. Being lied to isnt easy, especially after marrying someone who you think should be loyal and trustworthy. I hope things get better for you soon.
Thank you for the advice. I feel so disappointed in him for lying over and over again. And in myself for allowing him to repeatedly disrespect me. I want to move on, but I know that's near impossible because we have a child together. I think I need to think more about giving marriage counseling a try.

>>17794594
I too had this experience >>17794713
But I am a bloke and it was my ex wife lying to me.
Its fucked. Its really fucked.

But I'll give you what I learned from the entire process.
Don't bother with counseling, don't bother trying to fix it- you'll need all your energy to fix yourself. Divorce whether everyone admits it or not, breaks people inside, and you need all the energy you have to rebuild your life and who you are, don't waste any more time and energy, they are a precious resource.

As far as the child goes, there are innocent victims in most marriages today. The truth is we are now at a point there's more children from broken marriages than functioning ones, so whilst there will be disruption, long term things will be fine.

Children mimic their parents not just in words but behavior. The longer your child is around lies the more they will normalise such actions.

>>17794943
Thank you for your advice. Yea about the counseling, that's why Im hesitant. I know in my gut it wont work. I know he'll be on his best behavior until I let him touch me. It's how its been for years... But now I think Ive just had enough. Im not willing to let his words and actions be forgotten anymore. I miss my old self where I wasnt so weak. I want that old self back.
Im so worried for my child. I dont want him to be like his dad or grandpa when it comes to treating the women closest to them like shit. But I dont want to take him away from his dad either.
Maybe when we separate then we both will be a better version of ourselves. Then our child will see and learn from that.

>>17794594
I'll honestly never understand why someone would choose to get married.

I believe I have only met one marriageable person in my life, and even then I probably just didn't know her as well as I believed.