I can't just turn fucking gay randomly at 27 right? I've

Maybe you're some kind of bi? Maybe it's a chemical imbalance? Get professional help if it bothers you that much. Otherwise, nothing changes outside of finding dudes attractive.

>>17776355

>i cant just turn fucking gay randomly at 27 right?

you can actually, or rather, the potential to be gay has always been there and just gets triggered. there are many guys who just wake up one day and realize it. most times they can look back and see a pattern.

but yours isn't 'sudden' at all, is it? you just admitted that these ideas have slowly been seeping in.

you might not be gay. you might be gay. i know it seems scary at first (kinda proof that even allys are more homophobic than they think) but you'll get over it.

it may also just be that you wish to be clsoer to other men and your brain doesnt know how to interpret that.

think about animals, how cavemen would have acted in the wild, or hell even just how kids act.

they dont have the 'boundaries' that adults (especially adult men) are forced to have.

kids hug, kids kiss, kids climb all over each other and wrestle each other and think their best friend is more important than girls.

this isn't gay, its literally just normal male bonding. but in america were taught that its gay, and gay is bad (even if we say its good, its still not something you WANT anyone to be, its bad). therefore you must not act like you have any interest in men at all. the older you get the less important even platonic friendship is supposed to be... but thats not what evolution has taught us.

you likely want more male bonding, and you itnerpret it as sexual desire. and maybe there is an edge of that in there. but that doesn't make you gay in the current social sense.

or you might be bi. or gay. we dont know.

go explore, and just remember, its no ones businses but your own. being gay doesn't mean having to come out.

the only friend of mine who knows im gay only knows it because we met by me asking him on a date. he was striaght, but we hit it off and have been bros for 3 years now.

but no one else knows cuz its no one elses business.

>>17776361
I hope its some sort of chemical imbalance. I may find help if it keeps giving me enough anxiety to disrupt ability to pick up or meet women.

>>17776366
I really want nothing to do with being gay.
I don't mind people being gay but its not what I want at all. That is why this is so annoying. I am very neurotic and have bad anxiety. I am a hypochondriac for medical stuff - and I feel like this is snowballing and i'm building something out of it that is not really there.

I agree with you on your points about male bonding and gay not being bad. But I honestly just really enjoy being straight and I really enjoy women. That is why this is so disturbing.

>>17776355

some men (and women) dont know they're gay until they find the 'right one' who opens their eyes to it. supposedly.

two of my ex's were straight and had no sexual experience with guys or even porn til they met me.

one says he had gay thoughts but wasnt sure about them. the other said he had none.

for a lot of people who are gay, they just dont realize it. becuase they're told their straight, so how are they supposed to know their gay thoughts are gay?

me myself, i watched gay porn for 3 years before i admitted to myself that i was 'bi'. i had convinced myself that every guy does it 'once in a while' despite me doing it near daily.

>>17776366
but thanks for your words. maybe it is about male bonding. i appreciate your story and advice. it is the type of details im looking for

>>17776355
Sexuality is pretty fluid and most people are not 100% straight, given that you don't want to bang a dude or suck on a juicy penis ... there is nothing to worry about.

>>17776377
I am very aware of myself and my feelings. That is why I have been hyper sensitive and bothered by these minor attractions.

I want a future with a women. I always have. I love the female form and their beauty.

Did porn fuck me up? Did watching porn my whole life somehow fuck with my brain? Did society somehow fuck with my brain?

I just do not feel like this is natural for me.

>>17776366
You seem to know what the fuck you're talking about. Not OP, but how do I tell envy or appreciation from genuine attraction? I've been a bit bi-curious lately because I keep seeing things and features on guys I like, but it seems to mostly be features that I feel like I wish I had. Stronger jaw, taller, more muscular physique, sharper eyes and features. And I'm unsure of whether or not it's just me recognizing features for being beautiful, or if there's sexual attraction there. Because the latter isn't far-fetched to me as an artist. I've grown up drawing men, I can draw a much wider range of features on the faces of men, than that of women.

I don't really see myself actually being intimate with a man, but this has been something of a curiosity. I was wondering if you've known anyone who's said anything similar; or if you have something to chime in, yourself.

>>17776376

thats fine, until you realize you enjoy guys more. or you may find your bisexual.

like i said, you dont have to tell anyone anything, especially not before you figured it out.

but dont put up a wall to stop something thats there, cuz you're just going to end up depressed for 3 more years and blaming it off of a break up.

if you have anxiety wit hwomen, men may be up your alley. dont get me wrong all dating and pick up scenes have their issues but gays play far fewer games, its one gender so its not liek girls who hold all the power, and the idea of what is attractive is a lot more open minded.

>>17776376
You do know, you don't have to stop dating and fucking women if you suddenly like dudes too.

You make it sound like you have the plague. lol, man. You're just gonna have to accept your newfound attraction (which may have always been there anyway).

There's no fixing "gay."

>>17776389

>I want a future with a women. I always have. I love the female form and their beauty.

i hate to be that asshole, but most of my ex's said that. for years. every year theyd come around and we'd hook up or have a dating fling, and each year the story changed a little. the constant being
>i want a future with a women

they dreamed of the traditional house with kids cuz thats what were told to dream about.

it didn't make them less gay, and they all came out eventually.

again, not saying you ARE gay. but if you want to know the truth about you and your sexuality, then you need to actually explore it, even down the darker roads, otherwise you're just going to end up depressed and worried your hwole life over details no oen else cares about.

>did something fuck up my brain

no. nothing 'turned' you gay. the gayness was always beneathe the surface, and you just didnt understand it (assuming you are gay).

if you're told you're straight, you assume that your feeligns are normal straight guy feelings for a LONG time.

>>17776387
But at this point - maybe because of my bad anxiety and being neurotic - it is continually making me question what I really am. It is constantly on my mind. I seem to be constantly questioning whether I am gay now. Even though I have been happily and unabashedly straight my entire life.

I was a giant horn ball for women all my years until 21. Basically until the bad break up.

Then I got weird and withdrawn. And then this after I came out of the depression.

In college - after the break up - I somehow convinced myself that it was wrong to want women sexually - because it was objectifying. I started thinking lusting for women was morally wrong because I got involved in liberal social politics.

Could that have something to do with it?

Could 3 years of bad binge drinking have something to do with it? Fucked with my hormones maybe?

>>17776401
>I started thinking lusting for women was morally wrong because I got involved in liberal social politics.

Shit, son. You fell for the SJW meme. but attraction has nothing to do with education. There's nothing actually wrong with you. I think you're probably just realizing some things about yourself that you tried to hide away.

>>17776392

I'm gonna say what i say to OP which is basically that I can't diagnose you, no one can really.

and just like OP the only way to know is to explore those feelings. try watching porn. try having sex with a guy, or going on a date, or a 'non date' and see what happens.

just do yourself a favor and dont judge yourself based on how you feel after the fact.

for isntance a lot of guys would go out and have gay sex and come home and feel awful about it, mostly guilt. so they say 'IM NOT GAY, I DONT KNOW WHY I DID THAT, JUST AN EXPERIMENT' and then do it again and again and again and wonder why they keep doing something they hate.

but its like being bad at your diet. you eat a box of cookies, and oyu know you shouldnt have, so you feel guilty. but you dont think 'WOW I MUST HATE COOKIES FOR MAKING ME FEEL LIKE THIS'

isntead, pay attention to yourself during htei nteractions. the most important of which is: is your penis diamonds?


I agree with the average channer when i say you're either gay, striaght, or bi.

however, tumblr with their labels isn't wrong 'per se'.

im gay, but if i had to describe my sexuality beyond that, id say im something like a 'carnal-sexual'. i go for what i want in the moment no matter what it is, men, women, way too old for me, a little too young for me, or even just a weird attraction to something traidtionally ugly.

the system of 'gay striaght bi' should be used the same way 'male and female' should be used to describe gender. they are simple terms that give people the gist of us.

and in that sense you and OP may be striaght... but below that surface is a lot more quirks that are unique to you that you could define as something else.

a lot of 'striaght men' would be better off being in softcore romances with other men for instances, but still having sex exclusively with women.

>OP smoked weed
>it made him gay

The memes were true

>>17776401
Given your experiences with women, you can't be totally gay, so even in "worst case scenario" you're bi.

>I started thinking lusting for women was morally wrong because I got involved in liberal social politics.
Objectifying anyone is kinda wrong. I am probably more socially liberal than you and I love pussy nor ever questioned my love for pussy.

Don't think drinking did much either. It's probably a combination of depression that made you overthink about shit plus anxiety and being neurotic and there are no simple solutions.

You are what you do and not what you want, so unless you start fucking guys, you aren't a homo yet.

>>17776401

no. drinking for 3 years did not turn you gay mate.

theres a lot of concessions i can give, but you are trying to argue and logic yourself into being straight or curable.

let go. you may be straight. you may not be gay at all. but you will never know until you let go of the issues with being gay and accept what the truth is.

>>17776413

not true anon, me and most gays I've known had no provlem having sex with woman.

hell, im gay and i can still have sex with a woman (usually im drunk but you get the idea).

that doesn't make me not gay. you can argue there is a 'bi' edge, but its like cooking.

you have to cook every day to kep yourself going. that doesn't make you a chef. it doesn't make you half of a chef. it just means you did what you have to beause its what is expected of you.

including fucking women.

>>17776409
Fair enough. Please excuse me if it came off as belieng you have some immaculate internet gaydar.

>>17776419
>food analogy

No.

>>17776419
I wouldn't compare sexuality with cooking. If you willingly fucked women and had a decent time with them, it does sound pretty bi. Full homos who do women out of obligation and to keep up their own delusion or illusion for others are a different story of course. Hell it's not even as simple as straight - bi - gay, and there are many shades.

>>17776406
Yeah I did fall for that meme. Wish I hadn't because I fucked myself out of tons of pussy in college over it.

>>17776413
Thanks for the encouragement. I think at this point - no matter what it is truly - my anxiety and personality defects are making it a lot worse. I need to overcome whatever it is. I had social anxiety before and now its just 10x worth.

>>17776414
I am trying to argue that because this is driving me nuts. It is a problem I never expected or thought I would have to face. I do never ever plan on having gay sex to see if I am gay. But I do want to let go and accept whatever it is so I can move on - just not to gay sex for the love of god.

>>17776423

oh definitely not, i just didnt want to give the impression of me thinking that whatever i say is true across the board. everyones different.

at the end of the day i think men shoudl reclaim sexual exploration. having to test or explore is something men seem to fear, even when its jsut straight sex.

it shouldn't be. exploring sexuality should be the most fun thing about life.


>>17776429

i agree on the shades or sub categories, but there's no need to tell people im bi, because it just confuses people. hell i dont even tell them im gay usually but if i do, i just say gay, cuz when they see my life stylei t makes sense as gay.

just like how the guy who has sex with a guy once every few years or even once a year shouldnt say hes 'bi'. straight is fine.

>>17776430

>it is a problem

thats my point is that its NOT a problem. you had ideas of how life would work out.

this anxiety you feel is what happens when 'expectations' crash against 'reality'.

only one of those can change.

exploring your sexuality isnt a problem, its an amazing experience.

>i do never plan on having gay sex to see if i am gay

i cant wait to have this conversation with you every 2 years.

>i want to accept
>BUT ILL NEVER HAVE SEX WITH A DUDE

you cant accept your gay if you literally arent accepting being gay man

>>17776458
>but there's no need to tell people im bi, because it just confuses people.
Yeah, makes sense. If you have a strong preference for one gender going with "I am bi" is suboptimal indeed.

>>17776463

thats the idea. and beyond that there are lots of unique intricacies we all have.

i agree with tumblr exploring their sexuality, i just dont think it needs to be something pasted on their profile or said when asked out right when people just want to know 'whats ur genitallia, and what kind of genitallia do you like?'

>>17776355
I hope you can I fucking hate women.

File: 1470871334308.jpg (67KB, 906x507px) Image search: [Google]

67KB, 906x507px

>>17776476
KEK

>>17776476

ya gay yet?

>>17776484
The back looks very masculine and kinda a turn off. Guess I am straight as fuck. Not OP though.

>>17776489

>he thinks my back looks masculine

ur gonna make me blush anon

>>17776355
>I feel like I fucked my brain up over the years with drinking and drugs
there's a reason why history's most intelligent people were teetotalers

>>17776355
>I do not watch gay porn
It doesn't matter if you're not watching explicitly gay porn, if you masturbating while looking at a man's penis or a man's body, even while he's having sex with a woman, your brain will build up an association between the male body and sexual stimulation.

If you think youre attracted to dudes, why don't you fuck one and see?

I was same as you OP. I thought I was gay so I hooked up with this little twink asian boy. I ended up realizing I'd much prefer chicks and now I dont even think about it anymore.