I have an interpersonal problem that's become quite ups

>>17773434
(Cont.)

I finally got him to add me back after we went out on a rare trip to the pub (as a group of introverted gamers we don't really go out much), for some reason his alpha-ness drops dramatically in person, and I got him to submit.

So I'm back in the chat 4 months ago, and I'm pretty happy, I even felt like we were getting along better, we actually managed to share a few real discussions and jokes together. But then, about a month and a half ago, a few weeks after I started university, he just fucking stopped talking to me, not in a passive way, like I'll literally say his name, try to talk to him, and he will completely stop talking, actively ignoring me.

>>17773434
You didn't like, have their phone numbers, contact info or in-game names? This guy sounds like a douche. Circumvent him. Play without him and be done with it.

>>17773443
(Cont.)

This is really beginning to upset me, I don't think I'm wrong in thinking this is childish, it really doesn't strike me as the kind of thing such a smart person would do. I can't join in a conversation he's in, and if I'm having a conversation with others, he can just bring it to a dead stop by joining in and derailing it. I can't talk to him about it, he's always in the group, but never alone, and if he were alone I doubt he'd talk to me anyway. My other friends will not bring it up to him, as I say, he's very much the alpha and they are all introverts who don't want any conflict (In the 6 years of this group there has never been any real, on-the-surface drama). They won't even give me his phone number so I can try to text or call him, they're afraid they'll somehow get in trouble or something (yeah, that's how much of a stranglehold this guy has on the group).

If it were any normal face-to-face situation, I'd just say "fuck it" and cut him out of my life, I might not be happy about it, but that's what I would do. But here, if I were to do that, it would mean barely ever being able to talk to my oldest and closest friends, never being able to play games and have a laugh with them. I'd like to talk to him just to ask why he doesn't like me, what specifically he dislikes and to see if I could change or alter those things, because I don't hate the guy at all, I'd love to be his friend, but he makes it so difficult.

Sorry this is so long, any advice? He still has me on Battle.net, I'm tempted to try to talk to him on there, it's just I'd need to find a time when he's not talking to anyone else, which is rare because he hangs out on the server from when he wakes up until he sleeps.

>>17773447
He doesnt want to talk to you. Let him dude.

Not everyone will like you

>>17773464
I know that dude, and that's fine. Is it unreasonable for me to want to know why? I've never done anything to upset him, I get it if he just thinks I'm annoying. But don't you think it's childish? He must know it's upsetting for me.

>>17773443
>a rare trip to the pub
Dude! The next time you are together, share phone numbers and other contact information that you can get.

What does a server cost? Buy one yourself and move everyone over to yours. It will be new and faster.

>>17773486
When I say rare, I mean RARE, like, once every year or two. I don't want to feel like this for that long. In any case, I've tried, as I say he's much more malleable in person, but when I ask for his number he just says "you can talk to me on the server"

I've tried to do the other idea. But my friends are too fucking averse to change, or upsetting the equilibrium. During the period where I was banned for 4 months was allowe to use another friend's server - I said "hey why don't you guys all just move over to this server?" And told them why that would be a good thing, to which they respond "well, we'll just come over here when you want to play and move back when you're gone" and that just made me feel even lonelier.

That's the fucking crux of this issue, it's not so much this guy, it's that my friends can all see something is wrong but are scared to do anything about it. It pisses me off, I love them, but they're so averse to conflict or change.