Boyfriend and I have been together for around a year and have

Does he work? What kind of job does he do? From my perspective masturbating is a good way to nut fast with minimal work. Sex is great and all but it's a lot of work for good sex.

My take on this he's just too tired for sex but it's possible the spark has been lost. I'd say first try to dress more provocative around the house, shove your ass in his face, try to sit in his lap etc and keep going at it for awhile.

If that does no good the only way is to talk about it. I see you tried but don't back down. At all costs avoid turning it into an argument or shouting.

>>17752632

Thanks so much for your response.

He does work, I know there are a few people off work at the moment so he's busier than usual but he has also had a few days off and nothing has come from it.

I'm quite forward as it is, I'll try to be provocative, rub against him, etc, but he normally just pushes my hands away and tells me he's not in the mood.

I don't want to follow him around like an animal on heat, it feels like I'm forcing him into it. I also understand that half the time the point of masurbation is just a bit of relief but it's making me feel like he's covering for something or hiding something from me.

I've just tried again and it was met with complete indifference and unwillingness to speak about it more in depth. I really don't know what else I can do.

>>17752638
If that's the case then clearly something is wrong. Keep bringing it up but don't start arguments about it.

The perfect timing to bring it up is when you initiate and he says he's not in the mood. Then bring up you're always not in the mood, what's wrong?

If you do this several times either two things will happen;
He'll lose his shit and tell you to go fuck yourself, which could be a solid indicator he's no longer attracted to you or maybe seeing someone behind your back, possibly..

Two, he'll break down and spill it.

The important thing is don't back down but at while don't start arguments or raising your voice. This is important, be persistent about it.

>>17752602
>Recently we've both been a bit unwell and as such, weren't having sex.
This particular line makes me wonder if his health isn't quite as recovered as it seems.

I had a couple illnesses in life which destroyed my sex drive for weeks, even a couple months once following the relief of other symptoms. I don't know the science behind it but my dick was just not having any of it for a while unless it was just to work out physical stress, my mood was fucking gone.

>>17752644
To add to this
>>17752645
This is actually a good post. Did not consider that.

>>17752602
I've been like this with the wife. My excuse is, I just want some personal space. Tired from work, and wanna rest with some ME time.

>>17752644

I'll try this, thank you. We're really good at discussing things, we never raise our voices or argue significantly, but I'm becoming increasingly frustrated because if it is something to do with me, I'd rather know so I can decide what to do.

He assures me everything is fine, but I'm struggling to believe him.

>>17752645

It was a mild illness. I had a horrific virus for about three days, he had something similar but way less severe which meant he was uncomfortable but not dying. I don't think it's something he wouldn't recover from quickly (which still doesn't explain the masturbation - I could barely sit up during my illness and that was the last thing on my mind).

>>17752672
>It was a mild illness. I had a horrific virus for about three days, he had something similar but way less severe which meant he was uncomfortable but not dying.
Again, just giving you my personal experience here. I've never been the type to show how sick I am. People have thought I was fine on days where I felt like I was going to die, and was really just hoping that if I passed out I did it somewhere visible so I would have a shot at being resuscitated before brain damage kicked in.

As for the masturbating and no sex drive, at least for dudes jerking off can be entirely physical and disconnected from the brain. It's not because we're horny, it's because something caused excess bloodflow and rubbing one out is more like flushing the pipes and resetting the system so it goes back to normal mode than it is something to be enjoyed. This happens regardless of my mood or physical health.

>>17752682

Thanks again for your response :)

I don't mean to come across as selfish or ignorant...I know that mood and mindset are both very important for a physical relationship and sometimes people just aren't in the mood for it.

He just spoke to me about it, explained that he has been unwell and tired recently but there is absolutely nothing to worry about. I believe him. Think I've just been a little bit short sighted and sexually frustrated.

Thanks again guys.

OP are you getting fat or otherwise changing your appearance?

>>17752749

Not that I know of. I think I'm overly aware of how I look and if I changed physically I'd probably notice before he did.