tldr: Is there anything I alone can do to feel attracted to my

>>17751760
Sounds like youre putting in effort and he is not.

>>17751789
this
he is trash, get someone better

>>17751789
>>17751805

It sounds that way but it's only my side of the story. I have made the mistake of saying this to him and he has been very offended. He tells me it's a struggle for him also and that he does try.

So you think there is no hope for us?
There is a lot of love and care for each other but our sex life is terrible.

>>17751832
he needs to stop using porn, simple as that. if he isn't willing to ditch porn for the sake of your relationship, then he is trash and you deserve better.

porn should never be so important to somebody that they can't just ditch it, even if it's just to make their partner happy. like, who the fuck cares? you can jack off to your thoughts, memories, your girlfriend. you don't need porn.

>it's only my side of the story
you seem sweet, i hope you find what you're looking for in your life.

sorry i just read in your OP you said you've tried the no porn thing? for how long? if it was any less than a few months then no you didn't try for very long. and also i hope he was being honest with you. a lot of guys will just hide it when they say they will stop using it.

>>17751861
>you said you've tried the no porn thing? for how long?
He said that he stopped for 2 weeks one time.
He has stopped paying for it, at least from what he tells me.

>if it was any less than a few months then no you didn't try for very long
I don't think he could last a few months. He did say he would see someone about it but that is yet to happen.
It's at a stage where it's embarrassing to ask or bring up so I don't.

>and also i hope he was being honest with you. a lot of guys will just hide it when they say they will stop using it.
I think this is what he does now if I ever mention it.

I know from previous times, if I try to police the porn, he gets very resentful and hateful. He tells me to stop acting like a mother and let him control it on his own. I don't know how I would help him stop watching it. He now uses private browsing for it.

>>17751881
i'll give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he is addicted then. you need to make it clear to him that this is putting a huge strain on the relationship, and it can't last very long unless he does something to address the issue. policing it yourself is not going to work. he needs to see a professional about it, and police himself. honestly the easiest way is to go cold turkey. it gets easier with time.

if, however, it's not addiction and is actually just because he doesn't care enough to put in effort.. i'm sorry anon. but he doesn't care about you as much as you might think.

i'm the last person to want to shit on someone's relationship but.. you seem pretty miserable. i would like to see you happy, honestly.

>two weeks
that is a pretty poor effort
>paying for it
okay, i think once people start paying for porn is a pretty clear indication that they have a problem with porn imo.

that's my take on the issue anyway. i understand if you don't agree or w/e. i wish i could help more.

>>17751894
I have definitely made it clear that it's a huge strain on us.

I am now just left feeling like I love him but the attraction is gone.

Thank you for all of your replies. It was very helpful just to discuss this anonymously.

>>17751927
sounds like you've done everything right.
>i love him but the attraction is gone
are you sure you still love him? it's okay to have fallen out of love with somebody who doesn't seem to be putting in the effort to help your relationship. i hope you aren't staying with him just because its familiar and easier than starting again with somebody new.

i hope things improve for you anon. i love u