I'm a 49 year old mother of 3 children, and I've been

Quit bitching

>>17733605
Milf

Also just shun/exile/ move away

>>17733605
Most elderly behave that way but aren't as physically close so it usually doesn't get that bad. The language barrier may make her feel isolated from people outside of family and fellow Korean speakers. That along with the sense of duty to family is why she does it. She's probably not trying to be a horrible person.

Look, this is going to end with hurt feelings all around no matter how this plays out but you can choose how and when it happens. You can either start accepting the food and lying about eating it all and get rid of it in some other way like composting it or donating or something. OR you can be honest and call the old lady out on her BS. She'll be hurt, maybe your husband feels hurt. But that will fade over time. You could move away. There is an actual formula called mother-in-law distance which is far enough away that they don't casually drop by but not so far that they have to stay the night if they do visit.

No matter what you chose you will need the support of your spouse to make anything stick otherwise it will force them to pick a side and guys make terrible choices where emotions are involved. But leaving your husband seems like an overreaction if this is the only problem.

>>17733605
Just be aggressive to her. Reject the food. Put it in her mailbox or something after she leaves. If she gets upset, get into an argument. Win the argument. Repeat as necessary. It should be cathartic. Eventually she'll have a pavlovian reaction to your hostility and stop.

So what if she blames you for not being able to take care of the kids? What does her opinion matter? Honestly if you want to separate from your husband over your mother in law that's absurd.

Take control of the situation and be dominant. You sound like a very kind and understanding person. That being said, people will try to take advantage of you and not listen to what you say until you take a stand. Be strict and right to the point when you tell her not to bring food over. It's quite frankly ridiculous she keeps bringing food over when you tell her to stop. And what goes on in your house stays in your house unless you voluntarily talk to her about family life. Once you become dominant and show your mother in law who's boss, you'll have control once again and it'll feel amazing.

I know stepping up so abruptly is hard to do, but if you don't want things to continue the way they are, now's the time to act.

Best of Luck

What does your husband say about it all?
And when you talked to her, what did you say?

Post feet?

>49 year old mother on 4chan
Hmmmm really makes you think

>>17733605
Move away. Seriously.

>>17733605
Tits or gtfo

>>17733605
She has been trained by her culture to feel that her only value is as a mother, and she "buys" your love with food.

You are never going to change her. So you either have to accept her food and advice, thank her sweetly, and then throw it away secretly. Or you can hurt her feelings by rejecting it. "Thank you for this. We have plenty of food ourselves, so I am going to take this right now down to the church/charity/foodbank/homeless shelter. Would you like to come along and see how much it is welcomed there?"

>>17733664
Was about to point that out.

4chan started about a decade ago, so she was still in her late 30s if she started then. Weird.

Or like I said before, /adv/ is sort of scratchpad for aspiring writers.