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I don't know how to feel... don't really know what to even say...
My whole life I haven't had a single real friend. I've had one friend in childhood but he moved away. During the highschool I didn't have friends, I had acquaintances, and not even that many. Worst of all, I've never had a girl. Never kissed, nothing. I'm afraid all of this is due to being socially awkward/inept and ugly. I don't know why I'm even saying this all, it's not going to change anything.
I thought that maybe, if I got plastic surgery I'd have a chance. I can see people treating me differently. I saw how people treated me compared to my good looking friend in hs. He was the closest to being a friend ever since the childhood.
I'm even switching countries because I feel that maybe people of a different mentality than the ones that live in my country might see me for the person that I am, and not my outer appearance.
All of my facial features are ugly, and I'm afraid that not even surgery can make me look above average. By the time I have enough money to even try for plastic surgery and see if it even does anything, I'll be too old for anything anyway. What's the point of having surgery approaching 30s? I've come to terms with just being subhuman, not worthy of love or friendship. Some people lead nice lives, have someone to talk to, etc.
I don't know what advice you guys can even give me, I don't think there is a way out of this. I think daily of suicide, but I don't know why I still sense that small glimpse of hope. Deep down I know that I won't make it. I'm 20 now and haven't even started university. I fear I will get a job, and at one point just get fed up with being alone and take my own life. I look forward to that day.
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Sup Elliot Rodgers. Listen just because girls don't bang you doesn't mean suicide or going on a rampage is the right solution you angst fuck.
Grow up and see a therapist.
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>>17700716
Actually, I never mentioned killing anyone. You might have misunderstood what I have written. I just tried sharing my feeling, but it gets you called Elliot Rodgers. Thanks mate, cheers
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>>17700750
anyone but myself, that's obvious from what I wrote. Also don't think a therapist can change the way I look. Sometimes looks play a role. Sometimes.
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>>17700750
Waaah Waah I am ugly and no girls like me...better use the best solution of suicide to combat this.
This is your post in a nutshell. A guy so pathetic and hates himself so much that because other people aren't giving him attention, killing himself is the only way to solve this dilemma.
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>>17700769
Okay. Now try living like this for 20 years, and tell me if it changes you. I seem to get bashed for just writing out how I felt. I'm socially retarded, being social doesn't come naturally after you've been shunned your whole life. Thanks for your advice.
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>>17700791
And how exactly is killing yourself going to solve any of this? The only thing you will do is cause great sadness your family and nothing more. You will still die a virgin who felt like an outcast to society and took the easy way out.
There are people around the world with horrible disabilities, horrendous diseases and living in terrible living conditions persevering through....why can't you?
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>>17700801
I have been doing so, so far. But it's just coping, hoping things will get better. I don't see a point in such a life, where there is no hope towards a better future. There is no point in living simply to live, if you're stripped of basic human necessities such as companionship and friendship. We need this shit to stay mentally sane. I'm still hoping for what I said, that I will get money and just buy my happiness, basically. If looking good will make me happy, why not, right? So far I can still keep on going, but what I wanted to ask I guess is, what happens if you lose all hope? What to do if you reach a point of hopelessness? This is what I'm fearing. The people you spoke of, I can't talk for them. I don't know what kind of lives they lead. I wish them all the best. If I were in their place with anyone to care for me, I don't think I'd be able to go on. Not everyone is born equal, some can endure a more than the others. But why does it have to be a struggle?
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>>17700857
What do you want me to say? We all have our problems and struggles but that is life. I can't say anything inspirational to you because that is fruitless, know this though....that ending your life because how bleak things look now is the worst possible decision you can make. Rather keep grinding and paving your path to have a potentially better tommorrow. There is light at the end of your tunnel but it requires you to suffer and claw your way out of the darkness.
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>>17700881
You've got a point. As I've said, as long there is the slightest glimpse of hope, it's worth living. Thanks
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It' s actually really hard to give a good advice about this, as I feel like you have to know a person to give him a REAL advice. But in your situation I think I'd try to dive into somekind of hobby. Arts, books, anything. Or sports, whatever. You'd be amazed how many "worlds" there are right beside you. I bet you'd even find people that will look past your looks. I can imagine it's hard to overcome your problems, but I would suggest to imbrace it. To acknowledge it and move on. Trust me, you'll meet people who won't care for the things you think are important for social situations. Don't be afraid.
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>>17700701
I don't think looks or a lack of social skills are your problems.
I think that you have a serious case of making excuses why you're a failure.
The best way to solve this is to focus on something else. Try focusing on things that are in your control. You can study and practice social skills online, but you can also go out and fail repeatedly.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VaRO5-V1uK0
This guy has gotten laid more than you.
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>>17700920
Thanks mate, appreciated.
>>17700946
Truth is, that guy actually has a fun personality. I'd hang out with the dude.
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