I don't know how to reconcile the fact that I want someone

>>17699755
Find a more dom boyfriend. Or better yet, tell your current one you like to be abused and submissive in bed.

You can talk to your boyfriend about sexual desires. Thats why he's your boyfriend

>>17699777

We've been together for 6 years. I wish it was that simple. Here is a list of things I have tried:
>Talking dirty
>Talking factually (just telling him what I want)
>buying a book on sex and writing in the margins
>outfits
>setting up situations where he could excel

I've done more, but those are the main things that come to mind.

>>17699755
lel you can't really have both if a guy is going to treat you like shit in bed then he is most likely going to treat you like shit outside of bed.

>>17699755
Find a Muslim boyfriend and try not to get beheaded when you roleplay Muslim on white girl rape.

>>17699792

Yeah, I agree with that and that is exactly why I haven't just jumped ship. I understand its more important to have someone you love and connect with emotionally.

I don't think its true that he can't be more aggressive. He just doesn't understand that you can be someone different sexually.

>>17699787
And it still doesn't work to your liking?
oh well time to get a bull that will rough you up in bed. Here's a preview of what will happen
http://sharingher.com/249/lizerek-fucked-by-friends/

That's basically what I do. I'm very sweet and genuinely nice with my girl, but in the bedroom I choke, slap, spit, throatfuck, call her nasty shit etc etc. That's what she likes, and it's what I like.

>>17699755
>My boyfriend is boring as fuck because he loves me and doesn't want to abuse me like a street whore.

assuming this isnt bait like most questions like this. someone loving you isnt boring. what is the point in forming a relationship with someone if they treat you like shit. Most straight guys like being dom but if they actually love someone they wont want to treat them like shit in the bed room, they will want to make them feel good. your bf probably wont feel comfortable making you feel like shit. i couldent treat the person i love like shit in the bedroom.

>>17699808

Have you always been that way, or did a girl get you into it?

I don't know how to inspire him to want to hatefuck me bascially. He's very inexperienced and he stays in his head and I just feel like he doesn't understand the level he's supposed to be on.

>>17699755
You need to propose it as role play. If he isn't comfortable with actually abusing you, you need to outline it as 'pretend', kinky play where you allow him to engage your fantasies for a set period of time.

My ex used to want me to choke her, which I didn't particularly enjoy, but I could do it easily enough. When she asked me to leash her with a belt, I was less comfortable and it didn't really work out. The issue, for me anyway, was that it felt like a /need/, she /needed/ to have a belt around her neck. It took me by surprise, especially because she demanded it partway through fucking. I knew she'd experienced unsavoury, borderline abusive sex before and the situation made me uncomfortable, fast. Without boundaries or definition, one partners kink can awaken insecurities or fears in the other, and vice versa.

I'd suggest talking openly and honestly with your partner about what you want, suggest that your fantasies can be part of a controlled role play with proper boundaries. Take into account his feelings and don't pressure him into anything he's not comfortable with.

>>17699792
Not really. There are plenty of people who roleplay fantasy in bed, as OP described her effort >>17699787 her bf is probably retarded.

>>17699814
>the levels he's supposed to be on
It's sounds like your expectations are coming before your consideration for your partner.

Not gonna end well.

>>17699811
I could.

Most women have a rape fantasy, at least in the guise of "safe rape"; i.e., planned beforehand but the guy uses her as he wants and fulfills her lust for being objectified in bed and fucked like sex is all she's worth. OP seems to be one of these women, at least to a point. And these fantasies rarely if ever persist while her clothes are on and then she wants to be treated like a queen.

I am a bit surprised that there are men that would not fuck their girl like she's a porn star given the chance. Especially when she straight up tells him to.

>>17699828

I'm not sure what you mean by that.

To explain what I meant, is that I'm more sexually experienced than he is. I'm basically the only person he's had a continued sexual relationship with, and I don't think he ever "gives in" or is fully present in the sexual experience.

>>17699831

where you at bb lets be friends

>>17699833
It sounds to me like he's not connecting with your desires at all, which might explain his reluctance to 'give in', as it were.

If you can't frame your desires in a way that don't align with his then perhaps you just need to admit to sexual incompatibility?

Or commit to the process of sexual counselling?

>>17699814
Well, no. With my first LTR I wasn't like that at all. It wasn't her thing and I didn't know it was mine.

I remember the first time some chick asked me to choke her and closed fist punch her. I freaked out and didn't do a good job, but it lighted some spark. After that I went for shit like that every time I had sex, even one night stands, and got more and mroe comfortable with it. Some girls wanted more of it, some not. When I've been with girls who really want to be treated like shit it's resulted in amazing sex for both parties.

So, yeah. I guess it came with experience, but I had to be introduced to it by a girl first. Dunno if that would work in a committed relationship though. You probably have some dynamic that is tough for him to shake.

>>17699833

Anon is right:
>Not gonna end well.
your relationship is gonna be shit from this point, and then worse.

>>17699838
yeah we've gone to councilling already, forgot that from my list above.

>>17699836
Illinois but I'm not a girl. I love the rough stuff, to a point, though. If I was a chick ...

>>17699831
>I am a bit surprised that there are men that would not fuck their girl like she's a porn star given the chance. Especially when she straight up tells him to.

abusing someone during sex is different than fucking them like a porn star though. my ex was into me chocking, biting and hitting her. was off putting. i like sex to be slow, gentle with cuddling and kissing. i do boxing to feel strong, not hurt women and women that want to be hurt probably have mental problems.

>>17699842
>gone to councilling already
>post this thread
This >>17699841 honestly. The expert couldn't deal with your relationship problem with many hours of you two present, talking to him... and you think 4chan is gonna give you insight from a few lines of text from your perspective? you definitely are a recipient of several mental health issues.

>>17699845
>i like sex to be slow, gentle with cuddling and kissing. i do boxing to feel strong, not hurt women and women that want to be hurt probably have mental problems.
This.
When my ex asked to be choked, I could never, ever shake the feeling that I was just a side-effect of some abusive relationship or daddy issue. She was a kind, sweet, rational girl but I found out that she had in fact been abused, was child to a piece of shit father and had participated in physically injuring sex before.

It's definitely made me reconsider how I feel about domineering, 'abusive' sex, no matter how 'pretend' it might be. I want to be a more sensual lover, I don't want to treat girls like meat.

>>17699845
>women that want to be hurt probably have mental problems.

There are shades of grey here. (hehe) It sounds like your ex wanted to seriously hurt her, but not all women who want to be aggressively dominated wants to be seriously hurt to that degree

#notallwomen etc

Not that hard to me. Your relationship needs are reasonable, hopefully realistic demands that came from insights, life lessons, past relationships etc.

Your sexual needs are carnal and come from a not particularly rational place. If there are people who want their partner to treat them lovingly and with respect in everyday life, but to pretend they're eating them alive during sex or pretend they are a talking humanized blue fox, why would you worry about your sexual desires not aligning with your everyday desires in a more straightforward way?

>>17699855
> I could never, ever shake the feeling that I was just a side-effect of some abusive relationship or daddy issue

We're all fucked up. Even if something like this is sparked in some trauma, it isn't necessarily that bad or wrong. I don't think giving the women here the impression that if they're honest with their kinks to their s/o then their bf is gonna think they're fucked in the head, is a going to save any relationships.

>>17699857
>It sounds like your ex wanted to seriously hurt her, but not all women who want to be aggressively dominated wants to be seriously hurt to that degree

you might be right but i feel there is a thin line between wanting to be aggressively dominated and abused. aggression is a pretext to violence. anyway, i like sex to be loving with someone i actually see as my partner.

OP, why didnt you express this early in your relationship to know if you;re sexually compatible?

>>17699880
That it's their good right to want those things in the bedroom doesn't mean you're not allowed to not be up for that. Not everyone likes aggressive sex.

>>17699902

I did. He's told me the whole time that he understands what I want and that he wants it too, but he always has excuses. I've asked if he's gay, not attracted to me etc etc.

I think its that he thinks he knows what I want, but doesn't truly understand and all. That has come out pretty clearly in the last month or so when he says stuff like "I know you want it like this but you don't REALLY want _____" and ____ is normally something I very much do want and I yell that he's wrong and he goes "oh no, I do understand you want that.. I'm just not communicating right" I just don't know why he keeps lying to both of us about what he's into, because its definitely not what I'm into.

>>17699926
He's scared that you'll use your bruises received from all the rough against him in court when you false-rape accuse him of you get in an argument.

If I never expressed to him that I wasn't enjoying our sex life, sex would be this:
>kissing on the lips
>suck my nipples for a minute
>have sex

Thats what it would be if it were up to him. He says thats not how he wants it to be, but whenever he's in control (before or after I expressed I wasn't into it) thats all he does. I just don't understand being so unsexual and boring. I feel like I should be able to inspire him to be passionate, but it has never happened. I guess its over, but I was hoping there was maybe some late bloomer here that can relate with what might be going on in his head.

>>17699936
When I have rough sex I just unleash my rage against women and life. The beast comes out. Hatefucking is the best. Choking, slapping, spitting, facefucking, making them eat my butthole, it's fucking great. I think of all my oneitis's who burned me in the past while I'm doing this it REALLY gets me off.

Tell your boyfriend to listen to metal or something

>>17699755

Work out and get your testosterone up. Then you can be the one that treats other people like shit sexually!

>>17699880
It's not a healthy way to deal with a trauma.

I feel so bad for all the people in this thread not getting fucked like animals

I'll pray for you

>>17699755
my first bf was the same i think hes just not interested in being more passionate

>>17699800
Sounds like your boyfriend can't separate the person he is in bed with his mate from the person he is with her office in the world.

You've said you tried outfits, but have you roleplayed in those outfits? I think you need to get him out of his skin. If he feels like someone else, he might disassociate with his "in public" personality and let go, or at least, fulfill your desires.

>>17700152
He thinks role play is "lame" and all about cop or school girl outfits.

>>17699755
>marry your bf
>find a Chad or a Tyrone to meet your intimate needs
>divorce husband
>take the house
>bring in Chad/Tyrone
>???
>profit

I'd say it's not impossible to treat your gf with respect and be a decent guy while fucking her like a whore in bed. I know I can do it, so others must be able to as well. It's simply adjusting your behaviour depending on context.

I mean, if he really just isn't into that shit, then tough luck, OP, you're gonna have to suck that up. That's just like hoping you can get someone who isn't into shit play to regularly take a dump on your chest.

>>17699755
He might just not have it on him. Some guys just want to have nice, loving sex and just can't play the part even if they find the idea arousing.

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>>17700036
Well, at least those people don't have to go to couple therapy and got no result.

>>17699755
my GF is just like you.

I treat her like a damn princess, write her poetry, love letters, and more...

But in bed I'll choke the fucking bitch as I pound the fuck out of her. I'll call her my little cum slut, that I'm only with her because she's a fucking whore, and I own her. When she tells me "no stop that's too hard" I just fuck her even harder. Before sex I tease her so badly with foreplay shes literally begging me for my dick.

Sometimes when we are about to go out to hang out with friends, a movie, whatever I'll grab her right at the door and have my way with her. I'll finger her right then and there, standing in front of the door until she cums for me.

If she even looks at another man while were out I make her suck my dick and swallow every drop so she remembers whose dick she serves.

I love her more than anything in the world. She is the love of my life and I would do anything for her and she knows it.

Tell your BF to treat you like a woman should be treated.

>>17700533
O_O holy shit dude, you finger blast your GF in front of doors???

>>17699792
That really isn't true, at least not in this case. OP doesn't ACTUALLY want to get "treated like shit," she just wants to get dominated basically. You can respect a girl as a person and still cut loose in the bedroom, it's not disrespectful at all if it's mutually enjoyed

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>>17699755
I want the exact opposite, how the fuck do you think I feel? Sometimes you just have to deal with it.

>>17699811
>they wont want to treat them like shit in the bed room, they will want to make them feel good.
But gentle, low-impact sex doesn't really feel good. It gets boring. Rough, energetic sex is exciting. I think the whole problem here is that OP phrased it like she wants to be "treated like shit," when really she just wants rough dominant sex, which MOST women enjoy.

>>17699811
>they wont want to treat them like shit in the bed room, they will want to make them feel good.
But gentle, low-impact sex doesn't really feel good. It gets boring. Rough, energetic sex is exciting. I think the whole problem here is that OP phrased it like she wants to be "treated like shit," when really she just wants rough dominant sex, which MOST women enjoy.

OP here

To clarify, yes I want to be dominated like my dream guy >>17700533

>>17700630
>>17700647
If >>17700533
is what most women enjoy then most women should be put in an asylum. That's insane.

>>17700656

Can you leave

This is a high test thread

>>17700647
>OP here
>different IP

>>17700680
>I'm too poor to have a laptop and a smartphone

>>17700656
Why? For fuck's sake, why are you such a pussy? We're not talking about anything worse than a few bruises here. Stop treating women like they're made of glass, they don't fucking like it. You just convince yourself they do, because you're probably just not strong/fit enough to throw her around and hold her down and fuck properly without getting winded.

Because you believe a lot of incorrect shit, and you're not confident and comfortable enough with what your fetish is. Trust me, you're not alone.

>>17700685
keep trying

>>17700692

I'm glad you're on the case detective

>>17700688
>you're not a real man unless you like choking, spitting on and sexually degrading your woman as much as possible

>>17700703
For the last time, it's not fucking degrading if you both enjoy it. And you don't have to do it exactly like that dude described. The point is to GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD, stop worrying about offending her, and just do what feels good. Be impulsive. Be unpredictable. Establish a safe-word or something if you're nervous, and trust that she'll let you know if you've gone too far.

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>>17700694
>IP update exactly one
not to mention the greentext tryhard tone.
Too obvious.

>>17700717
New anon here

It is degrading for a fact. Consent keeps it from being biological assault.

Just admit you're into degredation. This thread is basically about people not being able to come to terms with that.

>>17699787
Start by telling him to slap your ass. That worked for me and I got super turned on. That was about 6 years ago, and I have slowly grown to be less and less self-conscious about my wanting to be rough. Maybe ask him to choke you a lil bit.

>>17700733
>pretends to be OP
>slightly clarifies OPs point
>adds and changes nothing

I'm a fucking mastermind

>>17700533
this post may be bait but this kind of shit
>When she tells me "no stop that's too hard"

is so annoying

i don't mind anything else in this post but how the fuck are you supposed to know if you're actually going """"too"""" hard or if they're just saying that for some dumb reason? the idea of a girl wanting to be dominated or treated like shit is a kink so it's fine if they properly communicate but the fact that multiple girls enjoy saying no when they really mean yes is fucking retarded

>>17700745

He does this but it's so not genuine. It's like a teammate butt slap. He just doesn't get it and I'm starting to see from this thread that some people really get it and some people just will not get it, and I guess I just have to accept its not something he can learn.

>>17700754
Safe word, dummy

I want full immersion

>>17700755
It's not a matter of "getting it" or "not getting it", some guys just don't get off on treating their woman like shit in bed. If that doesn't work for you maybe you should split up.

>>17700762
yeah i don't know how that idea slipped my mind

but i definitely came to that conclusion before i read your post ok

>>17700740
I really, really don't think it is. My girlfriend doesn't seem remotely ashamed by any of the stuff we do, in fact she's never more chipper and upbeat than when she's just had a good raunchy fuck. I know what she likes, she knows what I like, and we make a good effort to do those things for each other. And she knows I respect her and take her seriously. So anything we do when we're horny and alone together is just fun and games.

The word "degrading" implies that I'm damaging her self-esteem or showing my disrespect for her, and that just isn't what it's about at all. It's the opposite. It's about giving her as much pleasure & enjoyment as I can.

>>17700767
The reason we've been together so long is that he tells me he is into it and that is what he wants

I obviously don't believe him anymore. You can't be with someone for 6 years and never sexually dominate them and be like "oh yeah I'm super into being dominate"

>>17699755
>women

>>17700774
If its really mutual or even a favor, I can see what you mean. It's only slightly degrading anyway, and maybe she is into it more for the ickiness factor.

The point we're trying to make is that it's difficult for people to not see things as multifaceted and symbolic. On some level, spitting on a person is always degrading. It's defacing them by putting (you said yourself) nastiness on them.

>>17700797
I think of it more like a level of extreme trust and comfort. We're not squeamish with each other. I can get my juices on her, she can get her juices on me, and no body part is off-limits unless otherwise noted. I can smack her ass or pull her hair because I know it gives her a little mini-orgasm if she's not expecting it, and because she knows I'm not actually gonna beat her up or yank her hair hard enough to hurt her for real. And it's just BETTER when you're a bit sore after, when you feel like you both really worked your asses off to make each other feel good.

Know what I mean? We're both adults, we can take a little punishment or discomfort, and we trust each other enough to push the limits without exceeding them. Trust is the key here. If I ever end up single and having casual sex again, I'd be much more reserved with a new partner.

I have a hard time 'abusing' girls I actually care about.

If it is a girl I don't give a shit about, it's no problem. Slap her, choke her, tell her she's a dirty cum hole who is only good for fucking, grab her by the hair and rough fuck her face, fuck her in the ass, fist her cunt until she pisses all over, whatever I feel like.

If it is a girl I have feelings for, then I am far more tame. And I know this has caused me to lose more than one girl I actually cared about.

I think it has something to do with that I don't mind a dirty whore, they are a lot of fun, are a good distraction, and have their place, but I don't want the woman I care about to be one.

Oh well. just another of life's little paradox's.

>>17700854
>I think it has something to do with that I don't mind a dirty whore, they are a lot of fun, are a good distraction, and have their place, but I don't want the woman I care about to be one.

Make her YOUR whore, in the comfort and safety of your home, or she'll be someone else's. Or at least she'll wish she was.

You're doing it backwards, basically

>>17700816
Pain feels good, grossness can feel good, and this stuff with your gf brings you closer. That's understandable, and easy to believe.

Im just saying its degrading on some level, because it is. It's hurting and defacing someone.

Life can be seen from many angles *at the same time*.

>>17699755
I don't think that's actually all that weird. Wanting to be fucked like a whore and still wanting your partner to love you and treat you well beyond that is pretty normal. Nothing much to reconcile.

>>17700865
>nothing much to reconcile

In our eyes. OP has to find what is tripping them up.

>>17700861
I get you. I'm just saying the word "degrading" has negative connotations that don't really apply to the type of thing OP is talking about. And as you're seeing from others in this thread, some people just can't wrap their heads around the grey areas.

It results in women who are desperately ashamed of the things they want, and men who can't give women what they want without losing respect for her. It's this puritanical approach to sex that just seems to make people miserable, I don't get it

>>17700869
Sounds like her guy just can't deliver

>>17700879
They think its black and you're telling them its white. The solution is for them to finally see the grey.

>>17700889
Youve gotta love someone and be a real man/woman/ze to do a sexual act you don't like well on someone. Generosity and open-mindedness both come easier for some than others, not to mention all of the hangups ppl who think theyre moral create.

>>17700895
I do still disagree with you. I get that the activities I'm describing might fall within the Webster definition of "degrading." But at the heart of it, we're just trying to make each other feel good. The actual sex acts themselves don't matter nearly as much as the intention. To me, "degrading" would mean using someone for your own pleasure, without any regard for theirs. If I just started slapping and spitting and hair-pulling with a girl who didn't like that, then yeah, it would ABSOLUTELY be degrading. But within the context of a long-term relationship where we talk to each other and respect each other's limits, I really don't think it is. It feels pretty "white," to use your language

>>17700909
Its a light shade of grey. Nothing is absolute, my man. Nothing we ever do in our lives will be totally white. Stepping in front of a moving car to stop it from hitting a child can be seen as immoral from some perspectives.

If spitting and cumming all over someone is the ultimate goodness, you don't leave much room for widely available cures for cancer etc.

To get back on point OP is always going to feel slightly wrong about it, and maybe that's fine. Denying that feeling won't make it go away.

>>17700919
Fair point, by those standards I'd have to agree.

I will say, though, that feeling of "wrongness" you're talking about is the root of almost all pleasure. Pleasure and guilt go hand in hand. It just makes it even better when you find the right person to indulge those desires without MAKING you feel guilty for wanting them

>>17700935
Of course. Everyone who is liberal will have sex that falls in this grey area. Even a light spanking could be considered degrading. I don't know where the line is though. It's so confusing. I straddled where I guessed the line might be in my last relationship. She was willing to get fucked in the face until she puked and eat ass, but I wasn't confident enough that I deserved it from her, nor that she should do it in the first place.

God knows

>>17700959
So I didn't go that far. I kept it pretty vanilla, although I still utilized her skills

>>17700959
>Everyone who is liberal will have sex that falls in this grey area.
What?

>I wasn't confident enough that I deserved it from her, nor that she should do it in the first place.
I'm sorry, but you're a little mixed-up, dude.

>>17700959
>>17700962
Yeah it's not easy to find a good match. My girlfriend is the only person I've ever really felt comfortable and uninhibited during sex. I was pretty "vanilla" with most of my other partners, except one ex who wanted to go further with the pain-play than I was comfortable with. Everyone's got their limits.

I feel the same way, guys just say "I care about you and don't want to hurt you" whenever I ask and I'm like "???". It's not about being hurt, it's the feeling of being lusted after carnally, letting someone I love do anything they want to me, giving up control for an hour or so during sex is mindblowing to me. I think submitting to someone sexually is one of the only times I feel I can truly relax and let go of stress whenever I harbor it.

>>17700976
Why are you offended? Did someone puke in your butt?

>>17699755
>>17700983

Just cheat on your boyfriends. Most girls do it. Find a man you truly feel comfortable with.

Why do you think more and more girls are into fucking black men? Not because "muhh big dick". Most of them have average dicks, but they know how to be MEN in bed.

>>17700991
Bait, right? Every part of this post is a myth

>>17700533

This is a really intriguing insight into the fantasies of the modern day 14 year old boy.

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>>17700754
safe word man...

>>17700656
aww, your sex life must be fucking awful.

>>17700540
The point is spontaneous desire. That I can and will take her whenever I please. She will be doing the most mundane shit and I will come up behind her, manhandle her over the back of the couch and eat her pussy and then fuck her ass. She'll get back to doing whatever she was doing before a lot happier.

>>17700647
I was not like this at first. My GF told she "liked it rough" but never really told me what she meant. She eventually got enough confidence and told me exactly what she liked.

Just so happened It was exactly what I wanted as well but I was too nervous it would be too extreme for her. She's such a tiny little girl, extremely beautiful, delicate, and by looking at her you would never guess that was how she liked to make love.

We are both all about romantic gestures, candle light dinners, poetry, love letters, chocolates, flowers, cuddling and I love to kiss her hair as she is falling asleep like a kitty on my chest.

But at the same time when I push that whore down on her knees and have her ask nicely for her hard earned treat... when I look down at her big beautiful eyes and say "Swallow you fucking bitch." She knows that warm feeling in her throat is all love and god damn do I love her.

I'm going to go fuck that whore right now.

>>17700990
I'm not offended. I'm telling you that you're mixed up for insisting that consensual, harmless, mutually-pleasurable sex acts have anything at all to do with "morality" or "goodness." They don't. I mean, for fuck's sake, you wrote these words
>If spitting and cumming all over someone is the ultimate goodness, you don't leave much room for widely available cures for cancer etc.
That's a straight-up non sequitur, dude, and it shows you're thinking WAY too hard about this shit.

The fact that you're "not sure where the line is" & that you think that where a given sex act might fall depends on what one of the partners "deserves" pretty much means you shouldn't be giving advice about this stuff. That's not an insult. But it shows that you're a little bit mixed-up.

>>17700533
As I virgin this makes me feel really anxious, I'm not sure if I have what it takes to be this courageous, sexually. It's not even a conscience problem OP's bf feels, but a a lack courage to be this forward.

>>17701108
I think that morality is a factor in every situation and you do not. It's a difference of opinion.

>>17699755
see a therapist

>>17699755
Have you tried not being a whore?

>>17701126
Well, you shouldn't do that unless/until she asks for it. By which I mean, literally verbally asks you to do those things. If I read that shit when I was a virgin I'd be freaked out too, but this stuff gets less scary when you talk it out and try it out with a caring partner. I really doubt that anon was fucking like that on his first time, you ease your way into these things

>>17700991
This is obvious bait, but I will never understand what compels people to cheat. It's hard enough to find ONE person I'm attracted to and hold up that relationship, much less two.

>>17701358
I understand it when people are in a long marriage, where the passion has faded, and they're staying together for the sake of their kids or other practical reasons.

But if you're with a boyfriend/girlfriend, you could break up without much consequence, and you still cheat, you'd have to be some kind of sociopath

>>17701052
This is what a perfect balance between cutesy relationship things and sex is in my opinion. I guarantee you that every girl any of you will ever meet would give anything for a relationship like this, whether she will say it outright or not

>>17701012
>>17701279
>>17701310
There is some serious insecurities going on in this thread.

>>17701436
>4chan.org

>>17699926
Are you sure he is not holding back because he is afraid of what he might do? Maybe he only wants to do it if he only gets pleasure and seriously wants you to be scared and hurt. You said he thought roleplay was dumb. Maybe he is overly sadistic and doesnt want to share that?

>>17699755
That's not that weird. This is how a lot of women are, and you're really posting on the wrong site for it because... well the userbase is kind of bitter about this whole thing, but it's pretty universally hot to have someone you love fuck the shit out of you like you're a filthy whore. I've slept with a lot of women and ultimately 100% of them wanted that kind of treatment and liked it. And desu I like it on the receiving end from time to time too, a certain type of violence makes things more passionate. Constant "Oh I love you honey" sex is boring and plebian. Which, consequently, might just be the nature of your boyfriend's sexuality.

I agree with >>17699798

>>17701126
Oh don't worry about it man. It's just one of those things that come with experience. Like how when you were 10 years old, plain cheese pizza was the pinnacle of culinary experiences, but now you like more complex flavors. The more sex you have, the more dimensions you'll want to explore vs just what feels good physically. Right now that might feel intimidating, but just remember that in the end it's all for fun and intimacy.

The odds are pretty good that you're gonna have sex, and at some point you'll probably find yourself fucking some QT and realizing that you feel like tearing into her like a hungry animal with a huge dick. A lot of it is instinct, tbqh.