What should I do? I've recently started dating my boyfriend,

>>17648963
I'm scared of being this kind of guy. How do I avoid being like you're boyfriend?

Anyway, seems like he took those tips about "listen to your girlfriend, ask about HER" etc too far. Why not just ask him directly to be more engaging?

>>17648963

Ask him about more than his day, ask about his hobbies and dreams, any shit, it doesn't matter.

>>17648963

Hahahaha, I'm sorry, but you simply need a new boyfriend. You cannot cure vapid unless you are willing to be the one to help him become interesting.

It's not hard; go find someone who is actually interesting. In my experience, I always go for girls that I can admire for certain qualities, and I look for girls who also admire me. This way, we can both grow from each other. If your boyfriend is not someone you admire, find someone new. Life is about growing and getting better.

>>17648963
Do you know what he's in to, besides you and work? And I don't mean vague things like music or movies. Might as well say you like eating food.

Really easy to get anyone going if you spark up a current obsession in conversation. Even if it's something small like an app game.

>>17648979
I feel like that would be very patronizing
> Hey boyfriend, instead of only complimenting me on my beautiful looks, vast knowledgea, rapier wit, lean body, worldly outlook, cultured experiences, etc, instead of that, how about you converse with me like a normal human?

Doesn't that sound patronizing? I feel like if he maybe he even told me about his day or something interesting that happened to him once in a while, this would also suffice because I could converse with him on that. But he doesn't

>>17648987
It's hard because he's always asking me about me. Sometimes I think he gets these lines from help books, because he literally tells me, "tell me 2 interesting things about yourself." It's annoying, because this is usually after I told him a few interesting stories. I feel like a court jester.

>>17648988
>>17648991
I don't know if he has any hobbies. He's too interested in finding out my hobbies. I will try to find out if he has any hobbies. I might have to do what
>>17648991
said and force a hobby, like being obsessed with the same video game, if only have a conversation topic. I mean a conversation topic that isn't about how smart and pretty I am.

>>17649008

That's understandable. Have been in relationships where asking questions like that came and went. Still, it's a two way street, no matter how much he takes up the other side of the way. Don't ruminate, don't dwell, be assertive in asking him shit. Not aggressive, but show a persistent interest in it, one failed attempt makes room for two others. Take it easy on yourself, don't give up.

>>17649018
> one failed attempt makes room for two others

That's a nice way to put it. Tomorrow, I'll try my best to hold off on his questions about my life and I'll be persistent in asking him about his life. It'll be very hard because he's always fawning over me, but I will try my best to not go back into my habit of amusing him.

I'd bet anything that OP isnt that attractive.

>>17649038

Just keep at it, might take time, but it'll change. Abide him, don't accommodate or enable, just stick with it.

>>17649008
I said the hobby thing. Personally, things like that would get very annoying and I would probably end up asking, straight forward, "where do you get these questions from, some self help book?"
If you can say it jokingly enough, it might actually startle him into stopping and being more real. Sometimes people just need to be called out on their bullshit. Too many Zap Brannigon's out here.

Dunno why but you saying that is making me wonder about this guy who recently popped back up. Says he lives in the city but I should check it out first to make sure he's not homeless.

>>17648963
The whole point of a boyfriend is that being with him makes you both happy.

Just what are YOU getting out of this relationship?

>>17649043
This.
Attractive girls don't put effort into conversations.

>>17649256
No, the whole point of a girlfriend/boyfriend to is find someone suitable for marriage.
> Would she be a good wife?
> Would she be a good mother?
> Would we be able to raise a family together?
> Can we grow old together?

Unless you only date to find short-term relationships, being "happy" and good feelfeels are only part of the equation. With your reasoning, we should all date those fun girls, covered in red flags

YOU'RE BOYFRIEND AND I ARE THE SAME FUCKING CASE. SO THAT'S WHY PEOPLE ARE SO FUCKING BORED WHEN THEY TALK TO ME. HOW HAVE I BEEN SO BLIND. Thank you anon. You have saved my social life.

>>17648992
If you frame it like that, yeah. Not if you frame it like wanting to hear more about his life as opposed to him shrugging it off and redirecting the conversation to you.

>>17649341
Bullshit.

As for OP, try the suggestion of the first anon I quoted and if with plenty of encouragement it doesn't work, just ditch him and date someone who has something resembling an at the very least inner life.

>>17649831
OP here. It turns out he doesn't have any hobbies. He goes to work, goes to the gym, and goes home. He has recently gone to the gym more at my suggestion, which is nice. Doesn't pay attention to current events, or anything else either. When he asks how my day is all the time, and is short in description on his day, it's because he doesn't actually have a lot to say.

I think I'll try to cultivate a mutual obsession-hobby. What's today's equivalent of Harry Potter, ie, an easy to read, but universe-rich, long novel that can provide engaging conversation? Or is it all Pokémon Go and Games of Thrones?