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>Gf is/was against kids.
>Said in first two months that if I wanted kids we should break up.
>I'm like don't you want to get to know one another a little first? But hey if you want to break up, I'll see ya later
>Breaks down, feels unlovable.
Tell her why don't we just enjoy our time together, knowing there's an expiration date. Few months later I saw lets just call it off before it gets too serious. She tells me she's been talking to friends and her mom and she's changing her mind. I'm like you just can't change your mind about something like this, it's a life long decision.
Now I feel like she's changing to accommodate not losing me.. Is this deep insecurities on her part? Maybe her upbringing?
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>>17595413
Insecurities, yes most definitely, it's fairly easy to pick out that she's afraid of commitment and may just be using the child excuse to push you away.
I think, given time, she'll see that committing isn't nearly so terrible as she's been raised to believe.
Are her parents divorced and/or have a bad relationship and take it out on her?
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>>17595413
Yes, shes compromising.
Her want to not have kids probably wasnt that strong in the first place.
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>>17595413
>>17595449
>I'm like you just can't change your mind about something like this, it's a life long decision.
>Yes, shes compromising.
3/4 of all the young people I've ever met have at one point said that they don't ever want to have kids. Most of them change their mind at some point.
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>>17595413
>I'm like you just can't change your mind about something like this, it's a life long decision.
Well... you kind of can...
Things spoken from ignorance are a whole lot different when you've actually gained related experience.
How many people have said, "I'm NEVER getting married" then their circumstances change, they meet someone special, and they realize they really really want to?
How many kids have said, "Ewww... ating girls/guys?" and then that completely changes just a few short later
How many people have said, "Ha! How do people end up in debt? I'm never doing that!" and then the realize that lifes a lot different than than what they thought.
On this board in particular, another common one is, "I'm never not dating a virgin" because they themselves are virgins and then a few years later they realize (or they don't) that they were making cringeworthy as fuck assumptions about people because they had zero experience.
Shit changes in life. All the time. Especially because people tend not to know what the fuck they want, until they actually come across it and have that exact situation put in front of them.
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>>17595440
Complete family and parents still together. Guess the father worked most of the childhood while mom did most of the upbringing and he's kind of a hardass. Could have issues stemmed from that?
She's been hurt/dumped/"used" in the past from other short/long term relationships so could be that also? Trusting and whatnot
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>>17595474
I understand what you mean. I feel like she'd be great, we'd be great parents- in the long run based how we interact with one another now. I feel her self confidence is lacking in this aspect of life
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