Ok so I just kinda want to know if I'm over-reacting in

I've talked to her about my feelings on this and she does agree to try to avoid it but she's also complained that it's hard for her to hang out with her friends if she has to police who goes out with them.

I'm worried that I'm being controlling or over the top in asking her to not go out with them if he's there. I know alot of my anger directed at him may be irrational, but its still there and its really strong. I've never loathed anyone as much as I've loathed him.
I thought that it was pretty normal to ask your SO to not hang out with their ex but I'm starting to feel like I'm the one in the wrong. I know it may make it harder for her to plan things and on the off chance of him showing up to an event (usually around 4-6 people) is it completely wrong for her to leave?
It just makes me so uncomfortable with her being around him at all and I want to know if I'm asking too much or not.

>>17576362
Sounds like you're being pretty mature about the situation all together, however, I wouldn't be able to deal with that. If it bothers you she should be understanding towards not hanging out around him.

>>17576362
>>17576374

Instead of directing your anger at him, it should be at her. She broke up with you and then slept with one of your good friends. She had her pick and didn't have to go for someone close to you.

>I thought that it was pretty normal to ask your SO to not hang out with their ex but I'm starting to feel like I'm the one in the wrong. I know it may make it harder for her to plan things and on the off chance of him showing up to an event (usually around 4-6 people) is it completely wrong for her to leave?
Depends on the circumstances. It doesn't sound like they were together for very long or had anything serious. In reality, she was just using the guy. Feel bad for HIM, if anything.

>>17576362
Ok, I know you typed a metric shit ton already, but can you explain why she broke up 2 1/2 years ago?

Was there a break in trust? A panic? What?

Also how is the "ex-friend". Is he a douche? Is he generally kind? What is he like?

Please be frank about it, try to avoid twisting it.

>>17576362
Honestly, if you can't trust her then break up. Do you really want to spend your time with someone who you aren't 100% confident would not betray your trust? But do not worry you will just ignore this and do whatever feels good.

>>17576463
>She had her pick and didn't have to go for someone close to you
she was going for the maximum fuckery but the seeds of this fuckery didn't happen post break up, there was intent. She wanted to ball your friend and did. Women do not end a long relationship without another dick in mind.

She broke up with me because she was scared about things getting too serious. I'm one of her first serious relationships that have gone on this long and she was scared that I wasn't what she wanted. After breaking up with me she said she quickly realized she made a mistake and that I was what she wanted.
I feel like she just needed time to sort out her long term feelings, but her getting with the guy makes it a lot harder to move on from it.
The guy himself isn't that bad of a guy (as much as it kills me to say it). He's one of those more pathetic people that don't really do well around attractive girls (or any girl for that matter) and jumped at the chance to get with her.

I know I should be more upset at her than him but at the same time I feel like I understand her actions and have a better time excusing them. No one was inherently malicious in the whole situation and I'm the only one with a problem still.

>>17576512
We dated for 2.5 years. She broke up with me early March and we got back together late April

>>17577945

Listen, approach this as an adult, which you have been doing and well I might add.

But remove your emotions from it, and look at it from an objective angle.

>She was scared because she thought the relationship was getting too serious. So she went and slept with one of your friends seeking comfort for her actions.

I would be very wary about this. She is using a temporary emotional state to determine the fate of a long-term relationship/outcome.

What happens when she gets hormonal about wanting a kid? Worried or scared about Mortgage payments? When you guys have a fight?

If she is willing to throw away a two year relationship, a good one at that, and potentially fuck over your friend group and make a situation incredibly awkward I would reconsider making her a partner in my life, simply because she has no long term planning skills.

>>17577945
I will start OP by saying I have been exactly in your shoes before. To take her back you have to convince yourself you were at fault, or someone else was and she not much. Your current problem is you are questioning now the lie you told yourself. You are not the one with the problem. She broke up with you, fucked one of your friends, then had a change of mind and you, her second choice, there to catch her on the rebound believing her lie that you were always number one.

I don't think your friend is pathetic but do think your gf used him. She wanted to fuck someone else and he was convenient.

>>17576362
How can she rebound if she was the one that ended the relationship?

She saw greener pastures after 2.5 years OP and went for it but my guess is she went for some other guy, he fucked her and dumped her and she rebounded to your friend. You need to perform a bit more inquiry.

>>17576362
Sjouldn't have taken the thot back. Now that you did don't you dare give a man who as the only one did nothing wrong in that situation shit over it.

When she did this over "fear of being to serious" she will cheat on you when actual problems arise. Mark our words.