I've been thinking about leaving my boyfriend for a month

> be blind by his Romance again..

Seems like he has a history of luring you in then being a dick?.

Can you elaborate if that's the case?. I want to know HOW big a dick he is to determine if you are warranted in breaking up or if you're ruining a good thing.

>>17531306
A.) Break up with him.
B.) Stick with him because he's obviously a good catch and gives a shit about you.

>>17531310
>being a dick
in no place did OP say he was a dick. maybe if you didnt have one up your ass it wouldnt be the first thing you think of

>>17531306
Intencionally or not, here it's what's happening:
You are manipulating him and he is manipulating you.

You should ask yourself whether or not you're OK with being pulled back into the relationship, if you're having seconds thoughts, either bail or work them out.
But that all depends on the reasons why you wanted to break up, mind sharing?

>>17531312

I said "seems like" nigger, and I even said "if that's the case?", acknowledging I might be mistaken.

lern2read.wmv

>>17531310
not exactly that but I just get blind by the things about him I don't like, such as
- he's a narcissist
-he's selfish
-he cares too much about money and power
- he's made it clear that he will never be financially supportive
- he makes his friends a bigger priority than me
- his friends disrespect me
- I was sick with a serious illness and before I was diagnosed, he said I was a bitch, he wanted to break up with me, becUse of how much pain I was in which made me complain a lot. like he didn't believe I was actually sick or something, and only seems to want me when I'm happy and healthy and eeveyrbjng is rainbows and sunshine. then for the next few weeks while getting treatment after being diagnosed he prettty much disappeared from my life, only seeing me once a week for a couple hours. this event basically made me see clear the other things about him I don't like
-he has an unhealthy lifestyle drinks beer a lot sleeps all day eats unhealthy, also goes to bars sometimes which I don't think ppl in a relationship would do especially with his friends who are sleezy/not trustworthy

>>17531315
how ?

>>17531316
here >>17531319

>>17531319
Fucking bail.
He's not worth it, him being sweet now is definitely a honey trap.
Those reasons are legitimate, and he does sound like a dick.
Just bail OP.

>>17531319

wow. That's a long post and pretty quickly typed up. Seems like all these things are readily available for you to pull up at a moment's notice meaning you probably think about them a lot/ all the time.

I'd say you and him are not compatible. I don't even need to discuss the actual events/situations/anecdotes that are associated with your post's contents. No matter what you see him in a very negative light.

You should find someone better for yourself.

>>17531319
>he's a narcissist
People with NPD don't change. They'll lure you back in after treating you badly, because they don't want to lose someone that gives them regular doses of positive/negative reactions. They like drama as long as they can make it about them. They generally lack the ability to feel empathy for others.

>>17531329
yeah, :/
could be just a short term thing if he noticing me pulling Away

>>17531329
yeah bc I've been seriously thinking About it all for a month. I mean we've been together for a year and a half and it's my first serious long term relationship so it's a really big decision for me personally to leave him, we've discussed getting married and having kids and we went on a vacation together. so it's a really big thing for me if I leave him.

>>17531333
yes, he has no empathy. I was like SO sick I honestly thought that I was dying before I got diagnosed. I would cry everyday thinking my time is probably over. and in return, he told me I was a bitch and he thinks we should break up (break up with me at a time when I really needed support and love) bc I was too much to deal with then disappeared through aall my treatment and now wants to be all sweet to me.

>>17531340

How old are you?. If you were to make a list of "good" things about him would it be much shorter? equal? or longer? than the "bad" list?

>>17531346

Did he want to break up with you BECAUSE you got sick? or because something else incidentally that happened at the same time you were sick?.

OP, just bail on him, say that you are tired of his bullshit and that you want to break up, but do it face to face in a public place, don't be a pussy that texts people when they want to break up, and make it public so that if he turns violent there are people there to help.

>>17531353
I don't know . he told me he wanted to break up because I was stressing him out. before I was diagnosed, he just said I was a bitch and complaining even tho I walked down the street crying from pain while he walked in front of me on his phone Bc he thought I was being annoying and stressful.

after being diagnosed, he said he wanted to break up again Bc he said I was stressing him out bc we got in a couple fights, basically bc I told him he wasn't there for me because he wasn't. I had a couple trips to the ER and he just disappeared when i need someone to talked to me, also told me to shut the fuck up in text when I was in the ER by myself crying

so idk he says its from stressing him out but Ithink it's cuz he's too immature to deal with a sick girlfriend and maybe he didn't think I would get better (I don't feel like going into specific details of my illness but it's possible to not recover from it) so he just wanted to peace it while he could

>>17531348
24 and honestly I don't really know...

OP, your still young, go live, enjoy life.
That narcissistic boyfriend of yours couldn't even support you when you were sick, what good is he?
Maybe he is trying to work things out and realized he was a dick to you.
Have a talk with him.
I would have already bailed by now, but that must just be me.

File: 1467088378296.jpg (268KB, 917x1289px) Image search: [Google]

268KB, 917x1289px

There are no humans left, so you may as well settle because it's better than being all alone heh heh

~this post was typed on a computer~

>>17531391
yeah I think the main problem is NPD. I know, and in the future, what if something really bad happened? he wouldn't be there. that's why I thought about this for a while. I guess there's a tiny chance he learned a lesson and can change in the future , but I don't think that's likely. how can you treat someone who just got a serious illness so badly?

>>17531323
You make him miss you so he tries to come closer.
He wants you to come closer so he treats you better.
Even if it's not intencional, this happening over and over is bad, mmkay?

>>17531405

loll well I don't want him to miss me I was thinking of leaving him and trying to distance myself so it would be easier if I did and my emotions would be less strong

>>17531431
People miss even things they never liked, odds are there will be missing but that's not a problem, just life.

Leave him for these reasons

>this is too much drama for a relationship of just one month
>you want to be with people who respond well to being treated with respect and sincerity, not who can only be manipulated into showing care

>>17531441
we been together for a year and a half not a month.

>>17531444
Shit, don't know how I managed to read "for a month" as "of a month". Then just the second reason.

>>17531306
I feel like you're probably underage and you're just looking for the infatuation that comes at the beginning of a romance and that you have no idea how to actually have a real relationship. It's fine while you're a kid I guess but someday you'll grow out of it. In the meantime, get off this site.

>>17531318
yeah, and you thought something which you had no reason to think. you were wrong, regardless of whether or not you said "seems"

>>17531319
so basically he's a fucking asshole.
Don't be one of those idiots who wastes years on someone who doesn't deserve their time
You're pulling away and he is loosing power so of course he is going to lay on the charm until he gets it back. Because that's all it's about for him. Power.
Bail.

>>17531474


yeah it's just hard Bc he being all sweet again. I'm researching this About narcissists and it says that's what they do but they never change its just a cycle and they just make it impossible for you to leave.

seriously I need to leave him even tho he's making me fall for him again

>>17531493
Not gonna suggest you do as I do but will give you the benefit of my experience. I was blasted on a thread a few weeks ago but you have to take care of yourself and this guy seems to love himself more but you are a possession he doesn't want and sure as hell wouldn't want to explain why you broke up with him.

So, I do the emotional detachment thing, he sees, starts being sweet. I wobble and he angrily confronts me. Ah, the real guy surfaces again, so I meekly try to break up and he begs, slut shamed and dislocated my shoulder yanking me from the door and all within 5 minutes. He threatened me and my family and anyone I may be with in the future. His biggest complaint was if I was unhappy why did I waste so much of his time.

Now at the first sign of trouble with a guy, I cheat. It gives me incentive and a place to go, I waste no time and so emotionally detached I don't feel bad or sad.

>>17531869


cheating on someone that's awful I'd rather break up with him straight sorry Bout what happened to u. but that's really wrong way to deal with it