I need a confidence boost, not necessarily to get out there,

Kind of in the same boat as you OP.
Do you find that even if everything else is going fine for you, your mood drops after having an interaction with that person that suggests they only like you as a friend? Or if they're talking about a hookup they had or something?

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>>17476187
This quote from the great poet Shia Labeouf really helped me. Pic related

>>17476208
Yep.

It's to where I overthink the slightest thing that could be remotely considered negative. We're both, by society's standards "weird", and are pretty similar. However that also means I bear similarities to her twin sister which *does not help at all*.

>>17476222
>social anxiety
>friend group

yeah...naw

>>17476220
Thanks, but I'm afraid that if I do jump in, I might not let myself live down whatever comes out of doing it, as this is the only kind of experience I have. Getting close to only get pushed away as if I'm too innocent.

>>17476226
Social anxiety doesn't mean you're incapable of having friends at all.

>>17476222
Just try your best to distract yourself from your feelings for them. Thinking about other girls tends to help but don't compare them to her.

I think the issue is not primarily that you're a virgin, but your anxiety about whether you will ever manage to sustain something like that with a person.

It's no big deal to not get sex if you know that you could get it. It sucks not to have it, but it won't take a toll on your self esteem as long as you have faith that hypothetical people would want you. You find it painful to hear about because you hear about them receiving a social validation and experience that you are unsure you are capable of getting.

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>>17476187
I suggest getting some epson salt and bathing in it a few times a week. All you need is 2 cups. A foot soak would even suffice. 20-30min is all you need.

Look into magnesium and how it affects your mood. Most people are deficient in it. I started taking it and while difficult to explain - I just feel better. It doesn't "fix" me, but it gives me a better outlook on things. Low confidence usually comes from observing the negative side of things for too long. All that shit just builds up and it becomes you. Or you become it, whatever.

Also nigger, everyone is deficient somehow. You should try meditation and maybe you'll start to see life for what it is. Your experience can only be defined by you and there are no rules to a happy life.

>>17476232
>>17476236
>>17476249

Thanks a lot you guys

I'll try to consider other people and hypothetical options more. I really am unsure of how I could hold any intimate situation, and I'll look into the bath thing. It'd be a really nice change of pace if I got my hands on it.

>>17476257
I'm still open to more advice/discussion if anyone's willing, though.

>>17476249
Not OP but this sounds really interesting and I might try it.

>>17476187
We're made with companionship in mind, so even though it's not necessary, we are predisposed toward it (I don't know the exact science behind it, I must admit). Why not approach her, politely explaining that you know what she prefers, but asking if she'd maybe like to give a relationship with you a try. Let her know how she makes you feel, and a few things you like about her, but not too much or you'll freak her out, and too little will make you seem too casual about the whole deal, like you're not really serious.

P.S. I'm a 23-year-old, kissless virgin, so none of this advice is field tested, but I wish you the best, OP.

LSD.

>>17476268

Thanks for the idea, but I have a feeling that it might not work mainly because of events that happened *early* in the friendship.


I was in that crush phase early on, and she caught onto it and outright told me to get over her (for her own comfort), despite her knowing I wasn't actively trying to be more than friends.


Back then, she was more about wanting to prevent anything that resembled romantic advances (from anyone), to make sure potential hookups didn't get the idea she was interested in other people.


Despite being infinitely closer and different since then, that was still the most direct thing to have happened.


I can't bring myself talk to her about relationship-stuff, even though she'd likely listen now (and she's the one I talk to about problems >.<). But talking to her about that would also entail telling her about how frustrated and crazy thinking about all of this makes me.


Fucking hell, it's frustrating. I'll try my best to take this advice though, but slower. I'd love more than anything to have a natural status update on how we feel about each other at the moment, as I'm not even sure *I'd* be ready for a relationship with her, but I'd love to know if it were a possibility; that alone would boost my confidence.

>>17476336
How did this help you? Not OP but I've used it as well and have had significantly less depressive spells.