Hey goyms, /fit/ here I used to date this french girl, hottest

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Hey goyms, /fit/ here

I used to date this french girl, hottest girl I ever dated, until she had to go back to france one year ago (lasted 2 months but still she was lovely, we still keep contact)

I go through a lot of relationships/girls, to the point where crippling trust issues developed and my perception of sex got very twisted, which makes me quite unable to engage in sexual acts with women I know personally these past 3 months or so (which is why I'm planning to go unwind at an asian massage parlour)

I found out I'm going to paris tomorrow earlier today and I told her as well, and I expect she's expecting a good dicking. I truly have a lot of experience with women and I'm usually the first choice, but I'm in a position where I'm quite uncomfortable with the thought. Especially the thought of basically telling her "I'd love to go out for a coffee and kiss you, but I'd be quite against finding myself in a position where engaging in very intimate contact with you would raise my cortisol levels to a good ol solid level"

Wh-what do