I need some advice now more than I ever have. I've been

Already answered you

Hope you at least read it, i was the first reply

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Btw this was her reply.
Is it bs??

>>17469229
Yeah I read it. Thank you for your reply.

This is very tough for me and I'm glad to know I'm not alone.

>>17469230
I get what she is trying to say. I felt the same way with my ex when we went away for college. Funny thing is, I was the one who said an open relationship was okay and then it ate away at me so much I couldn't handle it and just broke up and neither of us even did anything with anyone else. I needed that trust. It's one thing to worry they might cheat, it's another to know they can and get away with it.

It's a bad idea. Long distance or break up. I promise you after a few months it will eat away at you.

>Agreeing to get cucked

is this a troll thread? 6/10 if it is

If it's not, dude. What are you doing. Please don't do this. I don't know you, but I really don't want any young male to ever do anything like this. Having your significant other HAVE SEX WITH OTHER PEOPLE IS NOT NATURAL. Jealously is 100% natural, and it's natural for a reason. There is no such thing as "being okay" with being a cuck.

You need to just text/call her tomorrow and tell her you think that's completely insane, and that you're insulted she would even bring it up. Never speak to her again after that. She is scum.

>>17469235
You're welcome.

From her reply, i can see even clearer that your relationship is going nowhere and doesn't mean much to her.

I agree with her that shit might happen when you are drunk at a party and someone hits on you, but that's exactly why faithful people don't go to parties, much less get drunk at said parties without their partners around.

When you are with someone you love or someone you really want to build a strong, lasting relationship, you are ready to make certain sacrifices for it.
I dated for one and a half year, she lived far and we only saw each other once in a few months. I had many opportunities to cheat on her but i still was faithful, and while we were apart, i didn't go to parties and barely went out at all except to work, it sucked but i did it because there was something that was a million times more important to me than going anywhere, and it was her, i loved her, she was everything i wanted and i was ready to make any sacrifice to make it work in the end, but she didn't feel the same, she would sacrifice herself for me like i did for her, and in the end she left me. I was broken hearted and depressed for months.

You don't want to feel what i did, it's very painful, so here is what i would do, i would break up right now, maybe she doesn't even want to get drunk at parties and is just making up excuses, whatever the truth is, something is clear to me, you do not matter that much to her, and this relationship is doomed to fail, even more now that you will see each other rarely.
It's gonna suck and you'll feel like shit for a while, but it's gonna be 100 times less painful than having her break up later when your feelings are stronger or finding out she had sex with someone else.

Be strong.

>>17469281
I meant
She would NOT sacrifice herself for me like i did for her**

>>17469225
Look its hard at first but always have a clear and open mind, don't always think of what she's doing or If she's with someone else because it'll eat you alive. So please keep a clear and open mind because maybe you'll find someone else if something does go down. That's all I can say. Good luck, Senpai

-Marked By, Ikaika.

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>>17469281
Maybe breaking up would be the right thing. I have to think about this.

Oh god i hate being away from her, but maybe it's for the best

This was her drunk note to me. If only she felt this way every time she got drunk

>>17469230
If someone really wants to be faithful is easy even when you're drunk at a party and getting flirted with.
Don't have an open relationship.
If you think she can be trusted then have a normal relationship but otherwise it's going to end soon.

>>17469344
>>17469344

Not OP, but I think that too.

Would like to here people's opinions on this as it's really interesting.

>>17469345
Opinions on what? Drinking but still being faithful?

I was drunk the other night with friends. All I could think of was, " I have the best person to love at home. I can't wait to go back!" And did nothing. I've always heard drunk actions are sober thoughts.

>>17469376
Precisely that.

I'd like to hear what other people think regarding it, may make a new thread but I figure I'd hijack OP's first.

>>17469230
I assume you are not the guy for an open relationship, so here are two good options.

1. You say yes and start checking out of this relationship. You know that she could be faithful if she wanted and her excuse is weak. She cares about you, but doesn't want it enough to be faithful. Let that kill your feelings for her. Hook up with other chicks and don't give a shit about your gf anymore because she's just one of 3 girls you have sex with. Text her, meet her, be nice and charming, but she's off your pedestal because she obviously doesn't put you on hers.

2. Break up. What she described could just as well happen anywhere else outside of college. "What if I'm drunk and insecure and we are far away from each other?" This shouldn't even be a question. College isn't the only place where you could easily cheat. Sounds like she just wants to jump into it and being able to do anything without any regrets and repercussions.

>>17469344
This. I've been fucking wasted many times while in a relationship and never cheated, i turned down a threesome with some random sluts at a music festival ffs (fun fact, the girl I was with at the time ended up cheating on me). Your girlfriend just wants some random d

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Thanks for the support guys.
I stayed up all night because I was so upset and I had a headache from the stress, but I got breakfast with one of my bros at 6:30 and he supported me.

Everything is looking a lot better even though I was freakingn out last night.

Do I still trust her, /adv/isors?
(Note: I'm taking my gut feeling before yours, but I enjoy hearing ur point of view on the situation)

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>>17470108
pt 2

>>17470108
OP sounds to me she is still down for an open relationship and prepared herself should you step out too. She is just trying to calm you down a little but this is the shot across the bow before the blast. Don't be shocked when she steps out

Me again OP
>>17469281
>>17469229

And again, break up and suffer a bit now or do not break up and suffer a lot later when she eventually leaves you.

This guy >>17470140 nailed it. She is trying to control the situation and make things easier since she saw you are freaking out.
Don't take her words at face value, people in general and specially women say a lot of things and play a lot of games in situations like this.

You've probably already decided what you're gonna do and nothing i say here will change it, i've been there too, you like her so much and want to be with her so fucking much you can't stomach the idea of breaking up with her, even though YOU KNOW, deep inside, that we are right, she doens't like you nearly as much as you like her, and your relationship will eventually end.
If you stay with her, at least prepare yourself and try not to do anything stupid when she leaves or cheats on you.

My job is done here, peace.

>>17469225

the relationship has run its course. the implication here is that you are STARTING college, but even if youre just half way through thats two more years.

and what are the odds of you settling down in the same place? like really. you are young, you've only been together 8 months. im not saying the relationship was a sham.

but something isn't beautiful because it lasts. its okay to enjoy what you had and realize that its time to move on and do your own thing. cuz thats what an open relationship like this is really, a refusal to see the truth.

its over mate. and thats okay. dont let it ruin your college years.

>>17469701
Maybe ops gf has never partied while in a relationship and doesn't know.
Cheaters always claim to get carried away and that it just happens, maybe ops gf fears that it's true.

>>17469225
OP, I'm gonna be honest with you and I'm sorry to say this but it's only fair if it's said: distance kills many relationships.

That being said, a 2-3 hour train ride isn't really all that bad. I lived 2 hours from a boyfriend and saw him once or twice a month.

If you can't handle that, or if she doesn't seem to want to be that faithful to you then it's time to start considering the possibility that there is someone near you that is worth going for.

That being said, a little bit of freedom in a relationship isn't as bad as it seems. The way our brains want to imagine things is that they'll find someone better, and you will fall out of favor with them and it will all happen immediately. But if anything, you could use this as a chance to further strengthen the relationship by showing her how reliable you are even when you guys don't have immediate access to each other. That is a method that works too.

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>>17470111
Those were good words until she said she doesn't mind about you being with other girls. Either she doesn't care that much or she is lying to ease her pain.

I can totally see where she is coming from. I did the same exact thing because I wanted my guy to not leave me no matter what.

Look, whether you break up or dont, it will most likely happen within the next year if you don't do it now. It may be easier to break up while apart, but don't go into college locked in your room and upset all day, afraid to party because you might cheat, afraid to get a job because you want to see her on weekends, etc.

Cherish your relationship and gently let it go amicably, either now or slowly into the start of college.

>>17470270
>how reliable
See this OP, don't make yourself a tool for some woman, don't become a "reliable" enabler.

>>17470302
Yeah, it's entirely a frame of mind kind of thing, not saying being the "how reliable" guy is a thing. If anything, taking that step gives you a future reason to end the relationship if need-be. It wouldn't be as complicated then (Though will still be significantly complicated until then)

>>17470312
I understood nothing of what you said.

Inhostle with junkie nahbours who r getting me weed. What should I talk to them about?

I'm being tempted towards the idea of an open relationship.

It could be a good test.
If we pass, then we know our relationship is strong enough to survive anything.
If we fail, it's all for the best because our relationship wasn't as strong as it could be.

Am I wrong?

>>17470391
>then we know our relationship is strong enough to survive anything
Whatever makes you sleep at night.

>>17470391
>If we pass
There is no such thing as a 'pass'. It's a lose/lose situation. Open relationships beget insecurity and mistrust, and never fail to lessen the relationship. You said yourself that you can't stand the thought of your girlfriend being with another man. You don't HAVE to accept that. Her possible lack of faithfulness should not pressure you into agreeing with her destroying what you have. Stand your ground. You are in the right.

>>17470391
I look forward to your thread in six months. I'll even help you write it

>Dear /adv/. My girlfriend and I just broke up. We tried having an open relationship, but I discovered that I couldn't deal with the fact that she was getting fucked by multiple men. She wants to continue as fwb. Should I do it????

If I were you, here's what I would do. I'd accept the open relationship, but mentally I'd be done with it. Go fuck around as much as you like, know that she's doing the same, and just have an unspoken understanding that as soon as you're done visiting each other you're gonna hit up your side hoes and she's gonna take a bbc.
Why? Because you get the benefits of a gf with the emotional support and the non loneliness, and you can still fuck when she isn't there. Best case scenario you both graduate and become exclusive again. Realistic scenario you will break up regardless and you just keep each other around until something local comes along.

>>17470221
This. She values your relationship, because she hasn't found better. The moment she does, particularly if she's free to without repercussions (this whole open relationship bullshit), she'll just say it isn't working out for her, and she'll move on to bigger and better things without any guilt at all because you just went along with her ridiculous rationalization.

Don't be a fucking chump, OP.

>>17470421
lol you know she would break it off if he went elsewhere for sex. she likely thinks he cant get a girl on the side and that's the only reason she's suggesting this. or she thinks he can and is sabotaging the relationship because she's too chickenshit to break up

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Thoughts?

>>17470459
You know, everything she said about her?
Apply that to yourself.
Fuck it, it's college, shit happens, and now you don't even have a gf but a fwb.
Go out there, meet people, have fun, grow apart from this girl that cares so much about keeping her options open.

>>17470459

Ballsy, I like it.

>>17470459
>""""""friends""""""
>""""""
You are cancer and a faggot.

>>17470459
You're a spineless retard who can't help but beg for his girlfriend to fuck some anon. You ask for help then buckle to your girlfriend and her shitty will. You don't deserve what you have, and you won't have it for much longer.

>>17470459
This is one of the most fucked-up things I've ever read, dude.

>>17470459
Stressed about your relationship? All she had to do is not fuck someone else.

I take back everything I said. It's over. Just dump her op.

>>17470456
You don't tell her who you fuck, that's just rude. And you insist she not tell you.

>>17470459
This is pretty much what I was advocating here >>17470421

>>17470459
When I went off to college away from my high school gf I was in denial about our longevity and our relationship slowly crashed into the shore and I suffered for a very, very long time.
I wish I had been reasonable and accepted that our wonderful time together had run its course and the best thing for both of us would be to let go. But never in a million fucking years would I have ever demeaned what we had together by putting myself in the situation you are in.

From the bottom of my heart OP, if you don't man the fuck up and dump this bitch who clearly doesn't want anything serious with you, you deserve all the shit you're going to get.

If this is the kind of "relationship" you think you deserve, then sure, go for it. But you love yourself and have more dignity than this.

>>17470459
Dump her, OP.