After the honeymoon phase ended for your relarionship, did any

Yep. Today as a matter of fact. Been seeing a girl for 5 weeks then today I sat down realised how her mood switches from day to day, how she said it's just casually but she's actually trapped me to the point I can't back out which I told her is the opposite of what I'm looking for. Now I'm scared because I don't want to carry on but don't know what to do

>>17465030
You either want to be with them enough to push through it and accept them for who they are, or you move on. Don't stay in a relationship that you don't believe in.

>>17465483
How to end it though? How do I go from being loving to completely disconected

I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 4 1/2 years and there are definitely things about him and I that annoy each other.
I'm very insecure and needy while he can be assuming and naive. What's important is that we recognize that we have our faults. No one is going to be perfect.
In fact, today we had a small argument over getting my cars oil changed. He assumed I wanted him to talk for me to the mechanic and I felt silly and childish for him to do that. We got into a tiff, he realized I am capable of doing that myself and I realized that he just wanted to help me and the issue was solved in about 10 minutes.
You have to love your partners other qualities more than their faults and come to understand why they have those faults. It's tough and you'll argue over stupid shit because of these small annoyances but as long as you discuss things rationally, it works out fine.

>>17465030
Yep! I have had that happen twice. First time I became so disenchanted with my partner that I left him and haven't looked back. Second time, I saw his flaws right off the bat and loved him anyway. They did grate on me some but I've practiced acceptance and love most aspects of his personality so much that I still feel an enormous amount of love for him even when I'm annoyed with something he says or does.

>>17465596
It's only been five weeks. Just break up

>>17465596
Wait, I just assumed u were >>17465237
Sorry if wrong

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>>17465617
Make reality something you could day-dream about.

>>17465667
Ooooops
A misquote of a comment on misquotation, noice.

>>17465672
Wew

I've been with my boyfriend for four years and I thought I hit that slump after year two. Then I grew the fuck up and realized that relationships take work--and I finally understood what that meant. Now I am more in love with him than ever.

>>17465237
Jeez dude.

What was your longest relationship? 5 weeks is literally nothing. Some couples stay in the "honeymoon phase" for years.

>>17465030
Yeah.
Been with my boyfriend for 9 years.
He's an arrogant, know-it-all asshole with poor anger management who loves blaming others for his mistakes.
He'll be a great politician one day.

It works because I am in love with him. Because I am a mildly insensitive bitch, definitely arrogant and a bit of a control freak, and he loves me anyway. Because we learnt how to deal with each other. Because being in a relationship, loving and committing to each other is a choice, and I choose to do it for him.

>>17466593
I like you.

>>17466594
I probably like you too.

>>17465030
> my wife/husband isn't perfect, what do!?
If you're considering getting a divorce because of some physical/social quirk, then you've got serious personal problems to deal with (and/or should've dated them for more than a month before getting hitched).

Also, fucking TALK TO THEM.
If you can't talk to them about this shit go ahead and get divorced now; save yourselves the time.

Before and during the marriage, I always found my then wife beautiful. Now, a few months after our divorce, I find her really unsexy and even ugly. Maybe my taste in women shifted, maybe she changed physically, maybe I was just blind to it.

was making breakfast one morning for gf and I. opened up a jar of heavy cream to mix in with the waffle batter. she comes into kitchen and freaks out that I used a little out of the jar she was to use for baking later. immediately leaves to go to the store 2min down the road. still in a bitchy mood when she gets back. is this a sign of things to come?

>>17466633
Sometimes it irks me too when someone used the ingredient I was gonna cook with, especially if I bought the exact amount that I need. I think this is just a case of miscommunication if she didn't tell you beforehand.

>>17466652
but it wasn't. i knew how much the recipe called for. plenty to make several batches. what bothered me more was instead of being hey that's ok ill get some after we're done, like I would've said, instead it was an immature melt down. i mean, this is among other things that irk me that i started noticing after this little incident

It became an endearing quality about them. If you're actually emotionally invested in them, then you work with it. If you can't break that shit off.

I realized that her anxiety disorder wasn't just a quirk, it was actually a huge deal that made her absolutely insane and I wasn't up for dealing with that forever. Broke up

>>17466633
Jesus dude. People have their off moments or bitchy moods. If that bothers you then please never ever be with anyone. No one will be happy 100% of the time and people will get irritated about small or silly things.

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>>17465030
>did any of you begin to notice
Yes.
>How did you get over it?
I crash the relationship...
>Did your relationship survive?
With no survivors!

bump for interest

>>17465030
Of course. I just rode it out and worked on what I could. Eventually I started noticing her looks more in a positive way and even started liking her "flaws"

>>17466977
of course no one will be happy 100% of the time
but it is unacceptable and profoundly disrespectful to take out your unhappiness on your partner.

>>17465483

Leaving is not going to help OP or staying with the girl, next time OP you need to get your emotions in check when selecting a gf or you will end up in a endless cycle of honeymoon phase insanity.

I am having that problem now. We've been together almost three years. She complains CONSTANTLY about everything, but refuses to do anything that would help her. She's become ungrateful and entitled. It's hard as fuck now and I feel trapped.

>>17466633

you live together huh, you and her might need more space.

>>17467248

you live with her?

If not i'd drop contact with her until you can get better in your head, a woman like this you shouldn't take very seriously until she's willing to be logical, the best thing to do is treat her like a child.

>>17467213
This is how it should be. You should love a person for their good qualities and bad qualities. It makes them who they are and they'd be a completely different person otherwise.

the honeymoon phase lasted 9 months. then i realized how awkward and socially reatarded he actually is. i took a moment to think about if i could life with that for the rest of my life if he would never hange. i decided i can and now i love him even more than i have evere before. beause now i feel like i love him. not my idea of him.

>>17467316
Yup. Too many relationships are founded on "Oh well I'm sure he/she will change!"

>>17467238
everybody's different. if the honeymoon period is over and i know that i can't see a future with this person, then it's time to cut it. it's silly to stay in a relationship you don't believe in anymore. however, if you feel that you can learn to appreciate their faults, or maybe you already do, then you'll make it work. i'm not sure why you think i'm telling op to leave his girl without thinking about it.

>>17467696
This. Everyone has doubts at some point in any relationship. It's healthy to consider everything and weigh your options of whether or not you see the relationship working.

It's silly to expect people not to think about their relationship. It's a HUGE commitment to be with someone for the rest of your life.

>>17465609
This.

>>17466578
Like 6 months I don't know why I can't stay with the same person

>>17468032
Fear of commitment?

>>17468037
Yeah I guess. Feels like I'm broke and I've got no way of settling, when I'm single all I want is a relationship though

>>17468051
I know it's said a lot, but you'll meet the right girl some day. It took me 27 years to find the right person and this relationship has no end in sight.

>>17465030

Oh yeah, girl I'm currently seeing I thought was infallible in the early dating process. Now I treat her like a little sister instead of an adult woman like I thought I wanted.

Sex is great though.

>>17468404
That's creepy.

>>17468366
Will I know? Should I stop going from girl to girl trying to find the right one and just wait?

Been with GF about a year.

She has physical flaws but it's as though they don't register to me.

Attitude/personality wise, yeah, I've started to notice habits or tendencies of hers that annoy me from time to time. But they're not really a big deal and the good always outweighs the bad. Her only real shortcoming is that she handles stress poorly. She's a very organised and diligent person, but when something unforeseen surmounts her schedules she can't handle it.

How long is the "honeymoon phase" supposed to last? I feel the same way about my GF that I did at the beginning, I just know her better.

A

>>17469346
There's literally no set amount of time. It varies between person to person (meaning the HM phase can end for one person in the relationship and not the other). It can last anywhere from a few weeks to years.

The honeymoon phase is basically just that fresh feeling stage in the relationship where everything feels "perfect" and your partner can literally do no wrong. It's when things move past that when you can begin to recognize that they're not perfect, that there could be problems to address and friction in the relationship is when the honeymoon phase is ending/coming to an end.

The issue is that once this "phase" is over, most couples just give up and move on without even trying to make it work. That initial thrill is gone and they get bored or scared. It's when most breakups tend to happen and not a lot make it through it. It's a pretty crucial part in any relation imo.