Do you people just randomly pick a girl that looks fuckable and

>>17454588
No one is special.
Everyone is capable of love.
If you don't believe in your heart that people are capable of love, you are woefully incorrect.

>>17454588
>Do you people just randomly pick a girl that looks fuckable and start a relationship?
No. Attraction can't make up for compatibility, although it certainly helps. I have high standards for friends and that's typically who I end up dating. It worked out perfectly the second time around.

>Don't you believe in that special someone?
There is no such thing as a soul mate, only people with varying degrees of compatibility. Anyone with really high compatibility can be your special someone.

>>17454616
>>17454612
but how do you meet girls?
like i understand how to talk and be friendly but you can only try to hit up certain girls lest you deal with an awkward situation on the daily ie work or school
>bars and clubs not an option for 18 year olds

>>17454588
No, you're not stupid.
There is no "the one" - there are certainly some people we, inexplicably (or very "explicably"), click better with but those people are more than just one.
Attraction matters. Compatibility matters. That special spark matters too. You can't make a successful relationship out of just one of those.

>>17454624

Just, don't force it. That's all I can really recommend. The harder you look, and the more you desire a relationship for a relationships sake, the more likely that you'll be unhappy in said relationship once it actually happens.

You know how things like "oh we met at a bus stop, and got on the wrong bus together just to talk" are romanticised? It's because random, happenstance meetings with someone you just click with usually work out the best. That's how I met my girlfriend, and I can't imagine being with anyone else.

Not to say that you shouldn't be open to a relationship happening, just that you shouldn't hunt one down either. And I'm sure there are plenty of "well I saw her at a bar and thought she was hot and now we're married" stories, but in my experience they're just less common. Good for short term, but not for long term.

>>17454588
>hey that chick is attractive, smart, and has my sense of humor
>let me get to know her so she doesn't turn out to be a loon
>awesome she's single and ready to mingle and not a nut

Aaaaand it's been 8 years.

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>Implying anyone actually goes through the relationship step anymore.
You just fuck now anon. That other shit is obsolete and unnecessary these days

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>>17454715
right?
it kinda just feels like your saying this is the girl i hang with and bang till you get married

>>17454588
>Do you people just randomly pick a girl that looks fuckable and start a relationship?
No.

>Don't you believe in that special someone?
There is no such thing as a perfect match. There are hundreds if not thousands of excellent matches for any given person, but they are not effortless: they require cultivation, maintenance, and sometimes even outright rebuilding.

The cultivation aspect of this is literally what dating is for: to find and narrow down candidates, and start building relationships.

There seems to be a meme among the /r9k/ crowd that one is supposed to get a girlfriend and then start dating them. This has it all backwards, and is ultimately at the root of a lot of their problems. Nice Guys get friendzoned because they're trying to get to know "her" (whoever "she" is) without asking her on a date. But by failing to clearly express romantic interest, they instead send the message that they are not interested. And so she distances herself as appropriate for the platonic friendship that she thinks -quite reasonably, given the information she has- is what this guy really wants.

>Am i stupid for believing that?
No. A little naive, maybe, in that way that /r9k/ers like to pretend they aren't. But not stupid. You have enough insight to realize that something is wrong with your approack, and that puts you leagues ahead of the average /r9k/ guy.

>>17454732
>Marriage.
kek. Even that's on it's way out. Like literally all that happens anymore is a quick ons. Don't need anything else, people only dated/got married in the past because they thought it was necessary to do before you could get the sex.
Now we've all become smart enough to nix the middle man and just get what we all really wanted all along no strings attached.

>randomly pick a girl
>date her once or twice
>didnt like her
>stop dating her
>find someone you really like
>keep dating them

>>17454762
This. Going on a date doesn't mean you have a girlfriend. You pick a girlfriend by going on dates with different girls.