I feel like years of depression and anxiety has scarred me badly.

go outside and exercise.

Take walks.

talk to randoms.

The problem with spending a fuck ton of time by yourself is you come to conclusions about everything and believe you are right about everything. even when you are being narrow minded or paranoid.

Basically get out and expand your social life even if it feels like a burden.

Omg this is like Im reading about myself :(. My memory is totally fucked up, so is ability to focus. Even on video games. Where are you from if I may know?

You may have ADD, see a therapist. I was diagnosed as a kid, now 25, never medicated and have felt this way most of the time.

It's called trauma and what you are experiencing are panic attacks. You should probably seek clinical treatment.

>>17451933
Might be hypertension; then again, I just found out today that my blood pressure is horrible so I just have hypertension on my mind. The symptoms are similar, though.

But, yeah, depression is an energy vampire that just keeps sucking away all your life force.

Fortunately, I have been able to regain some energy by changing my diet and sqeezing in exercise whenever possible which has lead to the healthiest and most fit period of my life.

Unfortunately, I haven't been able to reduce my sadness to an amount catalytic enough, through this venture, to make change and every couple of days it just comes down and I feel so god damn bad and weak.

I think it's too much now so I'm thinking it's time to stop; my blood pressure 174/46 which is 6 points below stage 3 hypertension for systolic; maybe my heart will just give out.

I don't know what advice to give, though; I would suggest what others here have suggested which is to get out, socialize, eat healthier (don't have to completely redesign your diet) and exercise, but those haven't helped me much.

Maybe start slow with the exercise and diet by designating a meal (such as breakfast) as your healthy meal and by taking casual walks for about a half hour or more. Reduction of snacking helps too.

For the getting out and socializing, try to not concern yourself with what others think and don't analyze your actions and interactions, just think about the interaction at hand and try to focus on what's being said/done.