Let's have another thread about giving advice for people

Do you have to wear a yellow star like it's Nazi Germany once you turn 25 and are still a virgin?

>>17451540
we should come up with some kind of identifier so we can meet each other in public

maybe a ring or some logo or badge. idk

>>17451555
it's just sex, who cares

most of the time people smell anyway

Lost my virginity at 19....mostly because of anxieties with sex. The best thing you can do is to keep doing something you are passionate about. Eventually you will find a girl with similar interests and she will be impressed and have sex with you. I find that the harder you seek sex, the harder it is to have sex. Just sit back and enjoy life more, and someone will want to lay down and enjoy it with you (and have sex with you)

>>17451555
You couldn't detect the sarcasm there? I have people of all kinds of hideousness get laid. You might even be very attractive. I think something about your psychology might not be making getting laid very easy for you. Perhaps try talking to someone who understands that sort of psychological thing. Asking a bunch of people who have never seen a vagina how to see one seems like a silly idea.

>>17451578
look another useless tripfag

>>17451569
I'm 18 and I want to lose it before I hit 20. I'm still kissless as well. Smh.

>>17451578
i could detect the sarcasm, but i still think it's a good idea to have an identifier

but yeah you're right, we're not going to give each other advice. but nobody else will either, nobody will ever understand us. that's why the only person who could help would be someone who was incel until 25 or more and figured it out and was willing to tell us how.
>>17451560
>it's just sex, who cares
i wouldn't know. it drives me insane that everyone trivializes it but i STILL can't even fucking HUG a girl.

>>17451606
>misery club
>no one will understand us

that's how you stay in the exact same place for so many years, the definition of insanity

>>17451580
I'm moving people to take action

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>>17451614
by spouting useless shit like DEFINITION OF INSANITY

guess what bro other people played far cry 3 too

>>17451623
>referencing Far Cry 3
>never discussing the thread topic

We will never be equals. You are a god steed among men.

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>>17451627
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oI_Ua5TbB5g

Turn up white boy

Get an escort.
It will alleviate you of your fears of sex and you won't care anymore.

>>17451657
it's not the sex, it's being not 100% worthless and having affection

>>17451663
You can't derive your worth from other people homeslice

What if you continue to have anxieties about sex when you're in a relationship?

I'm 24 I've and recently ended an 8 month relationship in which we never had sex.

First time we started to get close, I told her I was a virgin. She asked me if I wanted to, and I kind of panicked, I realised this was a choice I'd never explicitly been given before, and I basically failed to answer her. She was totally cool with it, was glad I told her and wanted to make sure I felt ready so we just chilled. And I felt kinda stupid.

Then she came over to stay again. Already in my head I felt like there's pressure to do it. At some point we we make out, I'm turned on but still nervous. I try to fake confidence and tell her I'm ready. She instantly starts undressing, my nerves ramp up, and I end up with my hand on her tit but completely flaccid. We chill again.

We went on holiday, got really drunk, had a huge conversation about it and how she wants to do it but I have to initiate and I have to be ready. Then she says "not tonight though I'm too drunk"
For three remaining nights of the holiday I failed to do anything, except one night where I put my arm around her in bed and she told me she was tired.

I realise I've made this sound like I just got cucked constantly but I know that I also fucked up. But now it's over I can't believe it never happened, and that I missed the chance to lose it to someone I did genuinely care about.

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>>17451676
>8 months

She getting dick on the side guaranteed homie

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I'm 30 and winter is coming.

Losing the 'V-card' isn't something to stress about; in all honesty, flogging the dolphin to your favorite type of pr0n/hentai is more exciting and'll cum harder.

Let's break it down:

>In order to have sex you need a woman/man.
>In order to get said woman/man you need to meet them somehow IRL/online/friend of a friend.
>In order to get a woman/man to want to have sex with you, you usually have to earn their trust and/or give them the impression that you're not just using them for sex or that you're not going to bail one you have had said sex. (Even if none of it is true)
>You build that trust by spending time with them; dates, social events, social interactions, etc.
>In order to build that trust by spending time with them ie. dates/concerts/dinner, etc. you need money since nothing is free.
>And they have to be attracted to you to begin with; women know in the 60 seconds of meeting and talking to you, if you're datable/fuckable or simple friendzone fodder.
>Last but not least you need to have the social skills to interact with them without coming off creepy, pushy, simply looking to get laid, etc.

And Bobs your uncle, comrade.

>>17451684
Wow, what an entirely balanced conclusion. Sorry mate I'm not going to waste our time arguing the case for her not cheating on me.

What was the point of this thread again?

>>17451708
Okay virgin

Get a little life experience, its embarrassing

>>17451676
i would lay off the caffeine and consider having a shot or 2 of booze before going for it again. you obviously have some anxiety issues. but she should still be at least a bit engaging about sex unless she is a complete virgin who has never dated anyone but you.

>>17451714
I tried to tell her she can initiate too, she said "It's your body not mine, I don't want to force you and I'm not going to do it for you"
So she pretty much internalised a problem that only I had, and started treating me like an abuse victim because of how big a deal I made it. I think next time I just won't say shit.

>>17451744
the problem is you are both submissive sexually so getting started ain't happening.

That why i recommend you loosen up with some booze or shit first. But its quite possible you may not be sexually compatible because neither of you is the top.

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Watch this and pay attention, this guy has got some good ideas and tips
https://youtu.be/b-a1jXgAsQI

Short version:
Pay attention to what women are talking about
Ask them questions about shit they like
Don't be afraid to diss them jokingly
Don't put them on a pedestal

I lost my virginity at 17 btw. Not great at ONS but good at seducing colleagues and such. They always come back for more of my D.

>>17451569
Wisdom there

I lost it about a year ago. Was 29 yo. There was alcohol involved, but the biggest reason it finally happened was that I had made some friends.

I lost it at 24 and was a kissless virgin that was pretty much a hermit. I'm 27 now and have had 4 four girlfriends since and fucked 6 new girls in the last 14 months. Single now bc I like fucking around but I'm looking for long term now.

To be honest I started working out, most would consider me buff. I'm well dressed. But the thing that changed most was getting a job that has a lot of workers. Basically it's like high school again. Everyone is hooking up lol I get more than most. It's still hard for me to pick up on girls on the street all my fucks have been work related. Except one. At work we have an easy topic to relate to. But when a cutie is checking me out at the store or gym it's hard find an in. I think I'm still a pussy in that regard. But I've fucked a lot of hotties from work.

Be social, go out to drink when you can but be in control. Be confident, most common advice but will always be true. Have goals not for girls but for yourself that's attractive to girls which is a great residual outcome. Develop your conversational skills by practical A LOT if you're not good at it. For me work was the biggest practicing area. I could keep a convo going forever if I want now which I couldn't before. When I watch guys that's their biggest weakness. They don't know how to keep a convo going to keep her interested.

Fucking bitches man, you got to do a lot to fuck them. Wish it wasn't like this but it's the dance you have to learn or die a virgin.

>>17451676
I'm understand you. the only difference is that i'm female but i also get anxiety if a guy starts to grab my breasts or something.

I'm pretty sure having casual sex is far more easy than getting into a long term relationship, I'm currently 26 and single, had sex in the past and what I'd do would be to get fit and go to parties/clubs. Just act in the mindset that the other person won't get to know you deeply at all so you can be whoever you want to be because it's just sex and appearances.

>>17451767
>But its quite possible you may not be sexually compatible because neither of you is the top.

Yeah, good point.
Well it's over anyways. We agreed we aren't compatible as people. Also I was a bit drunk at the time but it clearly didn't help. If I could do it again I'd have just not told her about it until we actually did it, because I think all I did was put pressure on her that she didn't feel she could handle.

I turn 26 in a few months. I'm still a virgin.

But it's my fault, I can't really blame anything else. I'm average looking, not a social retard, good at making people laugh, comfortable in social situations, and I have a great job with great income. Women even approach me and flirt with me occasionally so I've got some confidence in myself.

I just have really high standards. I didn't want to fuck the girls that wanted to fuck me. I didn't want to date the girls that wanted to date me. And I've never been interested in a one night stand. So now I'm a virgin at 25 and I've never been in a relationship, and it is crippling me.

Because now when I meet an awesome woman that is my ideal in every possible way, I'm hindered by the fact I don't know how to date. Don't know how to spoil a woman. Don't know how to be a good boyfriend. Don't know how to open up and share my life. And that prevents me from approaching these awesome women.

I keep dreaming that some day a perfect woman will approach me and I'll do everything possible to make her happy. That is how I know I'll be alone forever.

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>>17452135
You are like a better version of myself, maybe you can find comfort in this.

>>17452135
can you tell me what you look for in a woman?

I'm past 25 and I've got a major insecurity right now. The last GF I had was in highschool. When we tried to make out the weirdest thing was going on. Its like we couldn't synch up and get into this comfortable groove with what we were doing and the kissing felt awkward. I think that was my fault because I have no experience kissing anyone.

I ended up getting dumped the next day because she wanted a man to really satisfy her sexually and be all over her and I couldn't do that.
That has made me feel like if I try to date anyone now the relationship will be over like it was with her once they realize I really suck at kissing or being sexual or intimate. I don't know what to do to get any better at this either.

I've also only had like 2 girlfriends in my entire life and they both bombed as relationships pretty badly. I feel like everybody else is just so far ahead of me when it comes to being experienced in dating that I don't stand a chance in hell of being good enough for them.

Probably just delusional insecure thinking though. I'd like to have a girlfriend some day.

>>17452171
Here. I also have this really big problem where I lack the common sense on what is acceptable behavior when advancing sexually on a woman. I'm paranoid that i'm going to do something that is going to come off as me being a perverted creep and lose the whole relationship over that.

>>17452171
You probably already know this but the only real way to get better at something is to do it. To try, fail, and come back for more. You just have to realize failure isn't actually a big deal.

>>17452171
i'm pretty sure there are women out there who don't have much experience in kissing or sex. just don't give up.

>>17452192
>>17452199
Yeah I agree. I just need to press onwards and keep trying and believe that there is hope despite what my doubts are trying to say to me. There has to be somebody out there for me somewhere and i'm going to find them someday.

>>17452154
No one is better at being you than you!

>>17452166
Physically speaking, I find petite girls super cute, but I'm not very picky. I'm more interested in what they say and do. What they bring up for discussion, what kind of jokes they make, what kind of career they want to have, and what they're doing to achieve their goals.

Before I really fall for a girl, I need to see something in her that I admire. Someone that makes me want to improve myself just by spending time with them.

Jesus I sound like a fucking idiot

Depressed out of my mind. 27. No one has ever loved me, and I don't mean necessarily romantic.I seem to be worthless in people's eyes. They drop me like a hot potato.

jdimsa

>>17452223
>Physically speaking, I find petite girls super cute, but I'm not very picky. I'm more interested in what they say and do. What they bring up for discussion, what kind of jokes they make, what kind of career they want to have, and what they're doing to achieve their goals.
>Before I really fall for a girl, I need to see something in her that I admire. Someone that makes me want to improve myself just by spending time with them.
>Jesus I sound like a fucking idiot
No it's cute. Anyways, what is petite to you? what kind of job do you have? I'm just curious.

I pretty much look for something similar myself but i'm still working on myself in a lot of ways so i'm single.but i get very lonely sometimes.

Literally go to a bar or club and talk to drunk chicks

The whole "just wait and the right person will come" bullshit is just utter lies and I wish people would stop spouting this verbal diarrhea. This "advice" only works under the premise that you're just naturally charismatic and exposed to new potential partners all the time.

People telling autistic losers like me what is essentially "jus bee urself" fucking infuriates me. What the fuck do you think I've been doing for 25 years?

inb4
> the reason you're a virgin is your personality brahhh
I only sperg out on the internet, and even then I only recently even began caring about it

>>17452223
>Someone that makes me want to improve myself just by spending time with them.
You know how to hit right in the feels son.

>>17451606
>trivializes

They usually skim over the fact that being a virgin at 25+ is an indicator of other issues i.e. they are social retards. Being social retards they failed to make connections and relationships with people in general.

>>17452041
How'd you make friends at such a late age?

>>17452502
Not him but I made friends with coursemates.

>>17451522
I was 27 when I lost my virginity.
It helps if the girl is younger like 19 - 22.
Being in college helped as well.
I was in job corp, couldn't find a job and was just fucked. So after 7 months of their job training they sent me back to college.
I would joke around with some one I am comfortable with while the girl was in the room to show my confidence.
See if she laughs and continue to show that confidence, a buddy invites me to watch a the first avengers movie on blue ray, and I ask the girl on face book to join.
Played it smooth, make it seem she is welcome to join but also if she doesn't come no big deal but she is missing out.
She comes we watch the movie and make out, later we watch funny videos on her computer go to her room and we fuck.

>>17452502
Find some out side sport or some activity that involves working with people. Audition or sign up and focus on the activity at hand while getting to know others.

>>17451676
I think you saved yourself from doing it with the wrong person.

I'd never try to drug myself into doing it. I'm scared of losing my virginity because I think I'm going to have an identity crisis. I've been identifying as a virgin and if I lose that then I will suddenly become something else and can't ever go back.

I had it happen when I tried alcohol for the first time when I was 24. When I tell people that I'm a non-drinker they always ask me if I've ever tried it before, and now I have to answer that I have. I used to be a little proud about never having tried alcohol before. Now it looks like I'm an ex-partyfag who quit alcohol because I was going overboard with it.

>>17453378
>I've been identifying as a virgin and if I lose that then I will suddenly become something else and can't ever go back.

That's....incredibly retarded.

>>17453169
>8-5 year gap
No, I'd rather meet someone my own age or near enough. I mean, the few friends I do have, a couple are 4 year younger and there's enough of a feeling of a generation gap to restrict conversations.

>>17451744
The more you think about it the more problems keeping your boner. Trust me, it happened to me too.

>>17452041
You were so close to getting your wizard powers

>>17453510
It was one of the things that separated me from the impulse-driven animals I had to deal with. I wanted to live in lifelong celibacy for a very long time until I learned that there are good people out there too. I thought sex always had to be indulging and animalistic.

>>17453660
You must've had some REAL conservative religious parenting. Funnily enough I'm more than sure that sexual repression creates fucked up people. See: Japan's porn industry and /d/.

>>17453678
No. My country is barely religious at all. I'm not even baptized.

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Just half a year before I join the 25+ club.

>>17453688
>>17453678
No one ever told me to think this. They told me the exact opposite that sex is natural and healthy. It felt like they didn't want me to have a choice in the matter, but fortunately they can't force me to have sex so I didn't.

>>17453688
>>17453699
So...what exactly are you doing in this thread? Did you get a sudden realization or something?

>>17451606
>i wouldn't know. it drives me insane that everyone trivializes it but i STILL can't even fucking HUG a girl.
people who've had it trivialize it because anyone who's had it and is maybe even used to it knows that it's not some magical thing of awesomeness that makes you happy no matter what. Well, the first like three months it kinda does, but then life goes back to normal again, only that you now have a SO. You get used to it. It doesn't fill the void.
Sex is most overrated by those who've never had it.

>>17453817
>Sex is most overrated by those who've never had it.

You don't seem to understand that trivializing it annoys us cos you seem to ignore that being a virgin in your late 20s usually indicates other problems like a failure to grow socially, so that you remain a manchild or a completely withdrawn introvert.

I'm pretty sure that even virgins here don't realize that getting laid is the least of their problems.

Bumping cos this is one of the few threads where time is very much working against us.

>>17453988
>a failure to grow socially, so that you remain a manchild or a completely withdrawn introvert.
I see myself as being all of these things to some extent (or maybe a bit different, let's just say I feel like I've got serious issues), yet I'm not a virgin.

>>17454583
made me snicker.

>>17454594
>to an extent

Probably the key phrase here, I've always been socially withdrawn since school, partially to avoid getting my head kicked in and partially cos there was literally no one interested in geek/nerd crap at school, come to think of it, there was almost nothing except postcode gangs. It was different at college, but I stayed withdrawn and did the same thing at uni and kept myself to myself.

Now I'm 27 in a week and stuck in a dead end job with 1 parasitic "friend" and no experience in relationships or even general social things.

I'm 26, pretty much given up hope at this point.

Usually I can live with it, but I got a glimmer of hope recently that ended up being nothing. In the past I would have taken this harder probably, but now it's just par the course. I'm just mildly bummed out.

I need to turn this around but I feel so hopelessly behind I don't even know where to start. Damn.

I don't know if this will help anyone, but here's my experience on being a virgin until 27.

It's not that big of a deal. Certainly not the calamity that some people make it out to be. I dated a few girls through college. Probably could have had sex, but I didn't; I was still coming out of my shell.

I know that no one will believe me, but the first time I had sex was with my wife. We'd dated for five years, and had some rocky times, but she's definitely the one for me.

Why are you so depressed over being in your late 20's? It's a great age to be. People have finally grown up and can take responsibility for their lives, but are still young enough to be malleable. It's the perfect age.

>>17451522
put penis in vagina

>>17451555

Nice trips

People have tried this before on 4chan, but it never works out because everything is a gang symbol somewhere.

Currently 24, my issue was that up until I was about 21, 22 I actively isolated myself. Now my problem is I don't know how to put myself out there.

Currently living with the parents, the idea was that I would save money on rent this way. For some reason I didn't really think about the commute though. My commute each way is roughly 40 minutes, and the cost of gas is making the difference from renting a place on my own very small. I tried to move out, but the friend I was talking to decided to go with someone else instead. So I guess I could talk to randoms on craigslist, but I don't want to get stabbed.

On the point of meeting new people, I'm not sure where to even start. My college is pretty small, there are legitimately 5 clubs active right now. Of which, all but one automatically exclude me and I'm not interested in that last available one. I thought of taking up some classes for stuff like cooking but I'm still on the fence about that one. My friend has also encouraged online dating but I've heard just as many bad things about it too.

My current plan is to try to move out asap and then maybe dabble with online dating. I can't really decide on anything more substantial than that right now.

>>17455957
But see, you had contact with others, you simply weren't interested in sex (nor am I). These people bemoan the lack of intimacy, they focus on virginity since it is the easiest "marker".

>>17456202
Must be some dead anons cos they decided to copy a real gang symbol.

Bump.
Probably shoulda made this a general 25+ thread.

>>17456192
Some have never had sex at that age - We live in a society that loves talking about it.