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How can you get over the one that got away? I've dated other

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How can you get over the one that got away? I've dated other people since and even had a two long term (2 years +) relationships since but they've always just kinda been there in my mind. I'd forget/get over them from time to time but then they'd show up in a dream or some random bullshit thing would happen to remind me. It'd be a lot easier if I had a reason to hate them too but unfortunately I don't. I didn't break up with them (nor would I ever have wanted to) and they didn't break up with me so I can't even hate them for that. We had to split for reasons much beyond both of our controls. Can you ever really get over them?
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>>17446923
Thanks for fucking reminding me. Off to crying myself to sleep again.
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>>17446940
I'm sorry anon but at least we don't share the pain alone
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>>17446923

Im curious what these reasons you're talking about were, did they move away? If you were both in love and neither side broke up with the other i dont see what could have happened.

It sounds like you need closure, but thats hard to advise you on without knowing what happened.
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>>17446923
You have to realise that
>you won't forget about them
>your fantasies about your life together are unrealistic
>"the one" doesn't exist
You won't get over them completely. You will always think of them, dream of them, remember how awesome they were. It happens.
Whenever you start fantasising about your life together, you need to remind yourself that it probably wasn't going to be as good as you thought. In the long term things change, and even if they were awesome 5 years ago now they might be awful. Maybe they would have cheated on you, dumped you. Maybe you would have grown apart. Maybe they would have had a mental breakdown and start beheading kittens. Maybe they would have got immensely fat and ugly. You never experienced your future together. You don't know. Don't imagine that it would have been amazing just because it is comforting.
There are plenty of people out there who are as good as them. If you aren't open to new experiences you won't meet them. Instead of focusing on the one that got away, find "the one you haven't met yet".
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>>17446993
listen up, OP
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>>17446993
Basicly this/

The thing that helped me was also to make one last meeting. Flowers etc, and honest conversation. When she then told me to straight to my face there is no chance I felt lighthearted and relieved.
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>>17446923

How long ago? I had ex dreams at least once a week for a full year. I no longer get feels anymore, however, seeing her old facebook photos of us makes me feel pretty hard even though I have 0 desire to be with her. I spent 5 years with her. You just need to realize that they will always have a small piece of your heart, but someone one day will have a much bigger piece.
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