Months ago my ex-gf decided to break up our relationship of year

shameful bump

Reading this really hits me in the feels. I'm in a really codependent/physiologically draining relationship with a girl I love but who makes me miserable. She can be violent so my counselor and attorney (free consults) say I can't do it in person, but it feels so wrong.

A girl once did to me what she did to you, I think you did nothing wrong and it's her own way of thinking that resulted in the break up, sometimes there can be so many reasons that it's impossible to say, but given your post i believe you are a good person and you should move on as best you can, good luck my friend

>>17444366

Is it bad if I have been left by my ex gf of three years but I ghosted her in the end?

It was a distance relationship and I'm already surprised it lasted as long as it did.

>inb4 i've been savagely cucked, no I don't think so and it doesn't matter anymore anyways

We broke up because she moved from her native place to study and after a few months she wanted to be free to live her life and find out who she was, I could hardly argue with that but I was quite devastated, and whhen I learned that in am atter of weeks she was already with a guy 8 years older than her (she's 1 year younger than me) I just couldn't bear the fact that I would wait a looong time before I'd get up on my feet relatipnship-wise

So I ghosted without much excusing it. Does that make me a shitbag?

>>17444761
I don't think it does m8

>>17444740
Thanks dude.

>>17444761

>Does that make me a shitbag?
I don't think so.

Instead of projecting I'd better tell you what I did and what I "learned" which is quite similar.

The first thing after the breakup was to find common ground and not just stop speaking to each other, I wasn't against it, I was ready to run but decided to stay and hope if some sense would came to her and have a real conversation, hell, maybe make things right despite me not being a believer in undoing a breakup..

She started to act as if nothing happened but without affection, not good, too confusing but I followed along.
Then, text messaging, same, as if nothing happened and I responded. Friends said to me this was a "hook" a "shit test" to see if she still has control over me, I claimed it was nonsense, we're better than that, right?
Next, she tells me she is seeing someone else and it's better if we don't have contact at all, at this point I wanted to snap but remained calm enough to wish her well, nothing I could do or wanted to do at this point to be honest.

I regret the invisible things that I could have done or could haven't but I cannot change the past. Dude, I tell you this because this is what happened because I tried to stay, tried to trust not in her returning to my arms, I just wanted a sincere word, a true closure, but no, I just got smacked with her indifference.

The worst thing is that I still miss her, and I want her to be happy, that is why I asked and I still want to know, what happened to her that she can do these kind of things without showing any sign of remorse or guilt? What happened to her, who did this to her? sorry dude I'm going over the tangent here but yeah...you did good.

Sometimes I think that people are indeed remorseful for hurting other people, but are too shy or afraid to show it, and time goes on and that person tries to convince himself that time will heal by itself and their sincere word isn't needed.
Sorry for the rant dude.