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My girlfriend and i have been together for over 7 months. I absolutely love this woman and see a future with her, she feels exactly the same way. We both believe we have found our other half, our soulmate. Recently, she found out she was pregnant. She's unsure as to how far along she is but it can't be longer than a month. Neither of us were too careful when we were having sex, hence why it happened. She has told me that she wishes to have an abortion because neither of us are ready. She mentioned that she does want to have one but that the time is not right. Both of us are still in school, and young. I'm 26 and she is 24. I respect her decision %100 as to what she wants to do, and am will continue to support her even if she changes her mind. I don't exactly agree with abortions, but I see why people would want one. I would rather have the child but I have not told her. She has been shutting me out and said on multiple occasions that she doesn't want to talk about it and that she does not want to see me. I feel like I'm left out of and that my opinion doesn't matter. Everytime I try to talk to her it seems like I make her more distant from me. I am scared to tell her how I feel because I fear it will push her away even more and she will really not want to talk to me, possibly even leave me. I know neither of us are ready, especially since we haven't finished school, but I feel like we can make it work. I just feel like she will regret it for the rest of her life. I've read a lot about this and how women tend to break down even more after an abortion. The situation isn't perfect for us, but it never really is. I feel like we can raise a beautiful child and we might even regret even thinking about abortion. I feel like in a few years the child will be grown and all of the worries we had didn't even matter. So my question is, should I continue to hold my feelings inside and support her? Or should I voice my feelings and risk pushing her even farther away?
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I don't want to try and convince her to do anything she doesn't want to, it's her body and her choice and I understand that, but I don't want to live life knowing that what I said could have prevented something, not that I'm trying to take her decision away. I just don't know what to do. Or maybe you guys can see what I've been doing wrong.
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Like you said OP, the situation isn't perfect but if you two feel like you can make it work I say go for it. Maybe go balls to the wall and just tell her how you think you can raise the child successfully alongside her, there's nothing wrong with trying to convince as you do have some say in the matter. Say you will ultimately support her no matter what she decides and that you just want to be alongside her and if she's not ready she doesn't have to be. She could be distancing herself for multiple reasons, maybe part of her wants to keep it as well and is afraid you will leave. You'll never know until you talk, communication is key. Best of luck to you.
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>>17442668
>I've read a lot about this and how women tend to break down even more after an abortion
Then you've read a lot of bullshit.
Most women are relieved after getting an abortion.
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>>17442692
Do you have an idea of how I could tell her? I don't want to make her more distant, so I want to be as respectful as possible. She said she's made up her mind but I still feel the need to tell her how I feel, even if it won't make a difference
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Try sitting her down face to face and say something along the lines of "I wholeheartedly respect your decision and I will support you no matter what. But I wanted to throw my opinion into the matter, and I believe _____. Maybe I am being a little selfish in this situation but I also don't want you to regret it later on in life. We are in this together and I wanna take this opportunity to grow closer, not apart"
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Where were the condoms m8?
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>>17442716
We didn't use any. Both of us were not careful at all. The most we used were plan b pills
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>>17442757
>there are educated adults in first-world countries in 2016 who are this irresponsible
How? Do you at least have an excuse like being Catholic, or being raised in a bumfuck southern state that didn't teach sex ed?
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>>17442757
Jfk. You don't need children till you get some damn sense. Let her abort, don't voice your opinion cause you're not the one who is gonna have a watermelon pushed out your dick. Be supportive and if she doesn't wanna talk about it, she doesn't wanna talk about it.
And get some fucking condoms. Also plan b won't work if you're over a certain wait. Same goes for birth control pills.
You dumb ass.
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There are women she can talk to who have gone through with abortion and deeply regret it.
If you two are not ready to be married parents, adoption is something she can absolutely do. There are many couples on year-long waiting lists to adopt healthy babies. Giving up a child for adoption doesn't cause nearly the heartache that abortion does.
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>>17442825
She'll be fine
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>>17442800
True. See the thing is while we were I Tim ate she asked me to finish I side her. I did it. So I'm confused, do you think she wanted a baby?
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