Gf has extremely low libido. I love her to bits and don't

She's fucking other men

>>17422365
>I love her to bits
Doesn't sound like she feels the same, she'd at least give a handjob or blow job to calm you down if she was care or paying attention to your desires, but that's just a guess.

Note: She was a virgin before I fucked her

Just dump her if you aren't sexually compatible.

That being said you should try to talk her about it once before.

Grow up and realize it's not all about sex.

Consider how the insistence that she never wants to have sex might make her not want to have sex.

Well of course, I sometimes can't be bothered with sex anyway, I would just rather a blowjob and hit the sack.

Personally, we both love each other's company, hanging out together blah blah
We lead busy lives and are still trying to find what we both want to do as individuals.

However, sometimes I'm insanely horny and want to fuck the person I love, and I know she loves me.
But she's just never into it, that's the thing I want to fix.

(This is for the anon above, have no idea why it's letting me reply.)

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>>17422514
>sexually compatible

I've never understood this, penis+vagina=snug fit
does it not?

>>17422534
If you have ad block enables you won't be able to reply

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>>17422541
Thanks anon

>>17422534
hey dude, sorry, I was being slightly sardonic btw.

That mostly sounds healthy.

I would not bring it up though, it might screw up your dynamic.

it's not a thing you can 'fix,'
it's really not even a thing you can openly talk about without introducing tension. ('i really wish we had sex more often, she feels guilty, now you have guilty weird semi-forced sex)

the best you can do is try to find a reasonable way to talk about what she wants, and what makes her interested.

or leave, because your 'needs' are not being met, you always have a right to do that, but don't ruin a good thing OP.

I say, just jerk off more.

>>17422611
Thanks anon, there's a cynic in us all so I feel ya.
But I'll admit it, I have mentioned it once ages ago and she was not happy about it (got into an argument of course).
So I know that's the worst way to deal with it.

Also I know I could leave any time I want because my 'needs' aren't being met, but that's selfish as shit and seems like a baby reason to leave. We still love each other, we're still growing as individuals and like hanging out.

But all in all to be honest, I think I'm mentioning this on here because I need to let it out and just reflect on the situation.
As two people, we're both pretty happy and life is going really well so as you said, I don't think I should ruin a good thing.

>>17422627
Some thing that improved my situation slightly were working on the attraction (dressing better, working out, dieting) and working on chemistry (going out on dstes, spending quality time together, flirt, cuddle).
It improved things, but it's not like we are having sex as much as I wish we were.
Just deal with it. It doesn't get any better unless you put a shitton of effort into it. It actually gets worse with time.
Being with her means accepting you're not going to have sex much as you want. It might be worth it, if it isn't just leave now.

>>17422647
I've been with her for 2 years, so obviously that explains the decline in sex.
Also I don't think leaving her is worth it. We're just so compatible, I don't think I could put up
with a boring, annoyingly dumb girl just for sex, it just isn't worth it and isn't in my character.

I'm taking it as it goes and just enjoying what I have

>>17422647
Thanks for the talk though anon, I just needed to get some things out.
I hope your relationship remains fulfilling too, good luck

>>17422670
In a healthy relationship 2 years is nothing. The relationship is heading for the shitter mate.

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>>17422677

>>17422670
I decided to leave my SO over this, after 7 years. In the long run it affected my self esteem and ruined our relationship because I was constantly feeling rejected and frustrated. I am now dating someone very compatible with me, sexually and personality wise (and my ex is dating someone new, too).
I used to think that I already had a perfect person and sex didn't matter all that much, but it matters. I used to think I couldn't find a better match than him, but it is possible.
Don't settle down for a person you're not fully happy with because they are available and not too bad.

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>>17422689
well shit

>>17422365
Make your opinion on the matter clear.

Tell her on multiple occasions, calmly, that you aren't feeling satisfied sexually.

If she does not make an effort to rectify the situation in some way, cheat on her or leave her.

Life is short, man. You don't want to waste it feeling unsatisfied.

Having sex outside of your relationship means that you will be satisfied and she will be allowed to continue living a way that she feels comfortable with. And it's not like you didn't give her a chance to fix the issue on her own. Honestly, I don't get why people get so butt hurt about this stuff.

>>17422365
Sounds like a mess. It isn't anything good. I think we all agree on that. If you aren't compatible in this area then you are not meant for one another. There is a difference between emotional and sexual pleasure. But there does not have to be. Maybe consider all you're options anon.

>>17422696
not OP, but seriously don't do that OP.
'demanding' something of someone you love like that is bullshit, it leads to a dynamic of intimidation which will eventually escalate.

Maybe you'll get more sex, but it won't be the kind of sex you want to be having.

>>17422718
Agree with this anon, just break up.

>>17422718
I agree with this anon. I think if OP was piece of shit enough to do that, he already would have done it. Instead of coming on here for us to root him on. What sort of rationale is that to cheat someone. The, a bunch of angry anonymous people online told me too defense.

>>17422689
Pretty much this.

One of those things where it's no one's fault, but it's just a big issue.
It's not fair for you to expect her to fuck way more than she wants to, and it's not fair for her to expect you to just give up on being able to have sex with the woman you love. Neither option works, because having weird obligatory sex with someone who's not into it, and facing constant sexual rejection from your partner, are both huge roadblocks to intimacy.

>>17422689
>>17422781

OP here. These are probably the most rationale and closest answers for my situation.
My gf and I have had a few conversations about it, and it does affect us both.
She doesn't want to be forced into it, because she just doesn't feel like it, and I totally understand because it would feel weird having this obligatory sex that doesn't satisfy her.

I think more the problem is I'm scared to lose her, so I'm in this perpetual state of fear of losing her, but then I want sex so badly in the moment it brings me down and makes me feel like shit.

It's no one's fault, its just a stupid part of my life and I still need time to figure out what to do

Femanon here, what kind of birth control is she on? Because being on the pill completely murdered my libido, I only just got it back after changing pills
Lots of hormonal birth controls can have that effect

>>17422365
If she isnt willing to help you in some sort of way, then you just arent made for each other and as such should break it off cleanly.

You cheating on her or having a side girl wont be better for you or her, so the smarter move would be to just find out if she is willing to do anything about it or not.

Good luck OP.

>>17423094
She doesn't like using the pill, never has been on it. Sometimes I feel I've put her off sex or something because I was her first, and maybe I didn't hit the right note.
I really don't know anymore to be honest. She still finds me attractive and everything, just no enthusiasm for boom boom

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>>17422537
Sex drive compatible
>man wants sex every week
>girl wants sex every month
>guy get told to fuck off, thinks gf doesn't really love him, resent her
>girl think guy is only in for the sex, resent him
>tension
there, is that better?

Communicate with her and ask for her help. Explain to her that the male body has a lot more aggressive hormones, and you don't want to be a slave to it. That or get used to wanking.

Learn how to turn her on dumbass, women are like ovens it takes time for them to get ready to take a dick in dem, a guy is like a microwave were you press a button and in seconds is hot and ready .

Also, are you sure you're actually doing it right? Some people don't like to just hear "Let's fuck", gotta be real nice and ease your way into it. Say sweet things, be real nice about it. Make her get into a really good mood.

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>>17423602
>>17423605
>ie you have to manipulate women like children

>>17423615
I'm a guy and feel the same way