How do I make myself more attractive/approachable to the same

Keep in mind, despite what the internet and some areas seem to indicate, number wise not many folks are gay. Even if you live in "gay" town, most people are straight, so a random pick up or cold approach is statistically unlikely. Of those who are, fewer are stereotypes and as such you aren't gonna know with some magic sense. You need to know the gay scene in your area, to give you a place to look. It not just bars, and google should be able to tell you the gay hangouts in your area.

>>17420070
I did a brief googling of "lgbt [cityname]" and got this site where I found the lists of the gay bars in the city an hour away, and a mention that my muncipality "sometimes has activities" for LGBT people.

I can't really travel to the gay bars because I don't want hookups and I can't really be trusted alone in big cities at night.

I'm stuck getting dick pics from gross dudes on grindr, am I?

>>17420056

flirting doesn't need to be as hardcore as you think it is.

if i see a guy and i think i want to make a move, i just start chatting casually. if they are gay it becomes obvious pretty fast. most faggots cant wait to reveal they are gay. worse case scenario, you trade a few awkward lines of casual chit chat with a stranger than go about your business.

i once asked a complete stranger out though. he worked at the yogurt stop in gay town and i assumed he was gay too. most beautiful man i have ever met.

he was straight unfortunately, but we have been friends for three years this november.

>>17420080

>i cant really travel to gay bars beacuse i dont want hookups and i cant really be trusted alone in big cities at night

what? what do you mean by trusted? gay bars arent even notorious for being hook up zones, most people who go to them are there with their cliques. gay bars are for casual hanging out with friends, not for hooking up. the WERE for hooking up back when being gay was a hidden secret thing, but not anymore.

it sounds to me like going out would just be too much effort and you are being lazy. cant trust your self in a city alone at night? what does that even mean.

that being said
>im stuck getting dick pics from gross dudes on grindr, am i?

no. just download tinder and change the setting so you only see men. they CANT send dick pics there and as a result its generally used by people looking for something more than a hook up.

also, you can just put 'relationship oriented' in ur bio on grindr and approach guys by asking them out on a legit date. same goes for craigslist. i know that sounds gross but honestly I've met three boyfriends from craigslist.

>>17420098
How do I do this in a country where it's weird and rude to talk to strangers in the first place?

>>17420106
I have anxiety about being in public places alone at night and I resort to alcohol, overestimate my tolerance and have my personal belongings stolen. It's not safe.

How do I get matches on tinder? I used to have it, and all I got was dead silence.

>>17420116

>how do i do this in a country where its weird and rude to talk to strangers in the first place

dont give a fuck. if they find it rude, then they find it rude, but is it going to effect you in an hour? i really doubt this is a thing, its not rude to make conversation in any culture i know of. sounds like you are letting your later mentioned anxiety blow your 'customs' out of proportion.

ultimately if they are into you, they wont care. and if they're not, its as simple as saying 'see you around' and going back to doing your own thing.

>but i have issues with alochol and anxiety

either deal with them, or sotp whining. we are not here to make finding a boyfriend any easier, we are here to tell you how to get one.

>how do i get matches on tinder

stop being ugly?

>>17420137
Eastern europe. Talking to people you don't know is a sign you're either drunk, mentally handicapped or begging for money. Mostly it's done by older men who no longer give a shit about common courtesy. I've never had young people come talk to me, save for children whose parents were deeply embarrassed and profusedly apologised. Apologising for the behaviour of your child/pet is an acceptable reason.

Isn't there any kind of a big, shining beacon of COME TALK TO ME I'M GAY that I could do/wear?

I just came here to tell that the pic in OP is my favorite ice cream.

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>>17420158

yes, a rainbow. rainbow belt, rain bow shirt, rainbow flag, rainbow pin.

but that doesnt mean gays will. the problem here is you are still insisting other people should come talk to you.

pro tip: if you arent hot enough to get a single match with a faggot on tinder than you arent hot enough to have someone come talk to you no matter how obviously gay you are.

my original advice still stands. you are a young guy and should not be afraid to just go talk to other young guys out and about. if they are into you they wont find it rude. if they do find it rude, they will forget you exist in twenty minutes.

>>17420165
Oh and if you are a finn, just go to gay clubs? I don't think there is any other alternative, unless you just start hanging out in gay circles.

>>17420172
How does a young guy go waste the time of another young guy without getting his teeth knocked out?

>>17420184
I tried. All the gay bars are in Helsinki. I had my phone stolen the last time I tried and haven't dared to try again.

Where are these gay circles? How do I find one? Nobody on Tumblr knows and every goddamn homosexual born after -94 has a tumblr.

>>17420197
Well I think in larger cities there are these (bigger) friend circles that include a lot of lesbians and gays. I have seen these in Helsinki obviously, Lahti, Oulu etc. How to get into one? No idea. I just noticed them because they were friends of a friend.
I could imagine that they have gotten to know each other through Tinder or other dating site, gay clubs, those pride festivals. Like they have started out as dating but ended up friends and then they bring out new friends to the circle.

Also I've seen gay guys who have been pretty average looking but still really nice and cute, they've always been really open about their homosexuality but never been "sluts" and somehow they always end up with someone suddenly interested in them.

But yeah, Tinder is pretty much for hookups.

>>17420137
I asked again on tumblr. There has to be others.

>>17420241

other whats?

>>17420254
Them gays.

Helsinki can only house and employ so many people.

I know gay meet and fuck sites work well. Do the dating sites work for like romance and stuff? What about LGBT or gay pride depending on your age? What if you went to a gay bar but didn't put out right away, and made it clear you wanted a partner?

Just guesses.

Oh and I'm straight, but I can tell who is gay because they give me the eye for what seems to be no reason. The only remaining reason is that they're dtf? Idk.

>>17420286
Oh and gay guys coordinate their outfits and (generally speaking) don't wear anything gaudy like puffy sneakers or a bulls snapback. Dress like a gentleman, in good colors.

Oh and try eyeing people yourself and saying hello. Worst case scenario you get caught in a conversation with a straight guy.

>>17420286
I think they hold two pride things in the country every year, I missed the first one because I was at a dear friend's housewarming party, and I'm about to miss the second one because I won't be in the country.

I've been to a bar a few times but nobody came to talk to me and I didn't see anyone I would have wanted to approach, since that'd imply I wanted sex and I couldn't imagine going through with it.

I'll have to try the prides next year if I'm still alive I guess.

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First you need to figure out how what you are and what you want?
Are you masc or fem? If you're masc are you a bear, otter, cub, and so on?
Are you a top or a bottom or verse.
Are you masc4fem, masc4masc or fem4fem?
All of this will cut down on time.
Usually types go for types that look like themselves.
Comic related is quite true

>>17420302
Move to the west or northeast coast. There's gay stuff everywhere.

Are you not from the US?

>>17420330
He's from Finland, but he should move to Helsinki really. Or well, I live in Espoo, so much calmer than Helsinki and it takes like 20 mins via bus to get to Helsinki so that's a good option too.

>>17420327
I'm short and passionately uninterested in sports or fitness so I guess I'm fem. My ability to go through with sex depends entirely on how drunk I'm allowed to be and if he's ok with me crying during/after it, but I guess I'm bottom. I like guys who are taller than me, fat guys. I don't want to touch the skinny or muscled types.

>>17420056

>Money
>Power
>Success
>Stability

These things are written into all womens' genetic codes for optimal mates.

Look might be what lures them to you initially but once woman find out what you can provide them, they'll overlook anything.

>>17420355
I'm not into women.

I have some money out of a stupid stroke of luck, but no idea what to do with it.

>>17420343
So you're into bears. The problem for you there is that most bears are into other bears.
You're also a little shit out of luck for not wanting hook ups, gay men don't really do dating because there is no incentive to do so. It's really straight forward with what you are and what you are looking for.
Here's my suggestion. Start working on yourself and your confidence issues. When you can look at yourself in the mirror and want to date the person you see the similar typed people will have an amazing easier time coming into your life.
Averageness is really the death in the gay communities around the world you need to fall into either one of the oppositions and be remarked as such.

>>17420360

Real estate.

Buy condos, they're ALWAYS a safe investment ; just make sure it's in a good location and pay cash.

Rent them out to 2 people at a time and live off the profits.

Guys are pretty to find, right?

Not just to fuck but a nice homo who wants to settle down and interior design your sweet new home-o.

>>17420379
I'm about 5'6 and dating someone my height would be weird.

I'm not muscled or fat or remarkably skinny but I'm comfortable where I am.

>>17420394
Where do I get worthwhile real estate for 50 000 euros?

>>17420343
>My ability to go through with sex depends entirely on how drunk I'm allowed to be and if he's ok with me crying during/after it
Now wait what?

>>17420056
Hit on everyone you meet. You will actually be surprised.

>>17420495
How do I do that without getting punched in the face?

Besides, I can endure the affection from someone that I'm not attracted to, but how do I naturally make the first move on someone like that?

>>17420532
Youre not supposed to dry hump them right off the bat yo'.

>>17420586
I'm a bad liar. I can't fake interest to someone who isn't interested in me first.