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Two tier question here. My industry is very interconnected here in the city, meaning everyone knows each other even if they don't directly work together. There's a bunch of networking events and such. I'm relatively new to it.
Two girls I know from the industry came up with the idea last week to hook me up with their friend - we'll call her JJ. Then, my coworker took the liberty to tell JJ that he was going to introduce us at the next event (tomorrow) and to be ready for it.
Since then, other people have said some things about her that make her sound like she's not going to be a good fit. In addition, I've seen her pictures and I'm not sure that she's totally my type. (Plus I don't want my relationship to be the talking point of a bunch of people I don't really know yet.)
So, question 1 is, how do I politely explain I'm not interested without hurting her feelings or making people mad at me, thus building a stigma?
Question #2 is, how do I proceed with going out with this girl if I meet her and she is worth taking out? Get her number and text for a bit to get to know each other? Ask her out for drinks within minutes of meeting her? I've been on blind dates before, but never "set up" in the sense that someone has told each person they're being set up.
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q1 answer is easy: give no indicators of attraction during the meeting. If anyone questions you about it later, just say some bullshit like, "Yeah, I don't know, we just didn't connect."
q2: at the end of the first day, ask for her number. "Hey let me get your number so we can go out some time." she'll either shut it down or give you her # (either way, you don't look shitty). Then just text her after a few days and tell her to meet you somewhere. easy.
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