Over the past year, I have gone from depression to severe depression.

Unfortunately lots of friends are shit friends in the sense that they only want to stick around when you're having a laugh. When shit gets real, they bolt. Don't let assholes influence whether you live or die, or find happiness.

What do you want in life? I know it's tempting to say "nothing", but don't. I've been severely depressed before, I know how it feels

>>17393269
If ima be completely honest, i just want someone to care about me. It seems that every time i meet someone, they leave as soon as they realize what a sorry fuck I am. So im basically alone. Im too scared to even talk to people anymore because i know ill start getting attached to them and ill feel awful when they leave. Which has rendered me socially retarded, because at this point i dont know how to act like a normal fucking person around people because i try too hard to make them like me

>>17393256

Seek therapy from a professional.

Don't seek help through friends because they're not trained professionals and trying to unload your emotional baggage onto them will just make them run away.

Psychiatrist, now. That, or die. Up to you.

>>17393291
I dont have money for therapy

>>17393288
Do you have a job, school or neet? How old are you?

>>17393338
Im 20 and in college. Currently no job but ive been applying at quite a few places

>>17393298

>I dont have money for therapy

Then continue to slip into depression until you eventually commit suicide. You have a problem, and there are people out there trained to fix it.

If you really want to get better, you'll find a way. If you don't, you won't. Simple as that.

>>17393343
When you say you want someone to care about you, do you mean a friend or a romantic partner?

>>17393348
Just a friend. Not really in the right state of mind to be romantically involved with someone

>>17393343

Most colleges have some sort of program for therapy for students. You've done absolutely no research into this. No one else is going to give a shit about your life for you. Either you take your life into your own hands and decide to do something about it or just find a hole to crawl in and die.

You know exactly what you have to do you just want to come here and lament and have us pat you on the head and tell you shit you want to hear.

I know what depression is. I lived through it. I don't hold you responsible you for your disease, man, but I DO hold you responsible for your recovery.

>>17393343
My reccomendation is try to make it through college and get a job. Use the money to better yourself (going to the gym, etc). You'll feel a lot better if you work out often

>>17393344

I am assuming that OP lives in the states. Therapy is expensive as fuck there especially for a college student

>>17393350
Is there any guidance counselors avaliable for you on campus?