I'm thinking about proposing to my gf of 18 months. I don't

If you're not absolutely sure about it, then don't. This is the type of shit you need to be 100% on before proceeding.

Go on vacation with her for a week just the two of you together, to a place where there's nothing to do like Lake Louise or the Hamptons. Then make your decision. Imagine the strangeness of new surroundings, the excitement of being somewhere new, and the stress of being together 24x7 for a week.

>>17389023
>she'll have to leave the country in a couple of months because of her immigration status
don't marry her idiot she was only dating you so she could stay.

>I have massive doubts about my girlfriend
>Should we get married?????

Lol I dunno

>>17389029
This

>>17389023
I don't want to be a jerk but you sound like those that get a divorce the next day

>>17389029
I don't believe that. I've never been 100% sure about anything. On the contrary, I wish I'd been less of a pussy when I was younger and had taken more risks...

>>17389031
that's actually a good idea... I'll see if I can figure something out.

>>17389033
I've thought about that. But I've seen evidence that points to the contrary. Could still be true, sure. How do I make sure?

>>17389037
Is marriage really that big a deal? I'm not even thinking about the church ritual kind of deal.

>>17389042
People get divorced all the time. I'm not even thinking about that, though. I think it could really work if she wants it to work... I sure as hell could make it work.

>>17389045
>People get divorced all the time.
Yeah, and it fucking sucks all the time. It can last years and cost a ton of money.

>>17389045
>Is marriage really that big a deal? I'm not even thinking about the church ritual kind of deal.

Sorry, that sounded dickish. What I meant to say is that divorce is not the end of the world as long as there aren't kids... I don't ask for too much: just honesty and affection... everything else is plus.

So what I meant to say is that I think I could make it work with just about anyone... I'm no longer a guy that needs to sleep with tons of girls. If she is affectionate, honest, and supports my work, I can make it work with anybody.

And as long as there are no kids, divorce is not the end of the world...

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231KB, 627x502px

>>17389072
Really? I thought agreements could be signed so that I just get to keep all my shit (which there isn't even that much of). I've never looked into it because until recently I didn't even think about it... Where can I investigate more?

>>17389073
Do you know what "alimony" is? I suggest you look it up and read very carefully.

>>17389085
Prenups are regularly thrown out by courts, bro. There are reasons why people don't get married anymore.

>>17389073
Marriage isn't an automatic green card, know that first. It guarantees you a visa issuance number, but residency is not automatic. You still have to file an affidavit of support showing that you can support her above the poverty line indefinitely in case she can't work, so there's a guarantee she won't go on benefits. There's an interview process too. You can file for a work permit pending a decision on your process, which can get her a SSN and a driver's license and a job, but the whole process all told costs thousands of dollars even if you do it yourself and don't use a lawyer, and you should use one.

>>17389085
>I thought agreements could be signed so that I just get to keep all my shit
Those are called prenups, they have to be done before the marriage. I've seen /adv/ say that those don't mean shit if the woman can convince the judge that she signed under pressure. Also she might not agree to sign it in the first place.

>>17389136
>Those are called prenups
Yes. I used the name in one of my earlier posts.

>if the woman can convince the judge that she signed under pressure.

How would she do that? I thought those required a witness. Anyway, I will investigate further. I think if she tried to sue me, I have more power to afford a decent lawyer. It wouldn't be pretty, and I'd have to spend money on lawyers, but I'm pretty sure she can't afford what I an afford.

>Also she might not agree to sign it in the first place.

Then we wouldn't go through with it.

>>17389093
>Prenups are regularly thrown out by courts, bro. There are reasons why people don't get married anymore

Ok. I will investigate further.

>>17389089
>>Do you know what "alimony" is? I suggest you look it up and read very carefully

I do know what it is, but would be lying if I said I don't have to do more research on it... So I will.

Maybe I should ask her for another chance to let me meet her folks and I can have her meet mine, and play it by ear. If I get bad vibes, I'll forget about it and move on. But at least I will know I tried my best. Short of a time machine, I don't see anything else I can do...

>>17389094
I know it isn't an automatic green card. I'll look more into the legal paperwork, but honestly that is not what concerns me the most.

What makes me doubt is: what if she's not the person I think she is? That happened to an uncle of mine, and it sucked. He married what seemed to be a normal sweet girl, but turns out she was a complete psycho slut... Luckily her family sided with him (that's how terrible she was, no joke), so it was completely painless (well, save for emotional pain). He then re-married and has been happily married since and even had a kid.

Anyway, like I said, I am not planning on anything going wrong. I want something genuine, so I wouldn't be about the papers, and I'm sure I can make just about anything work out. I just gotta find out if she's as willing as I am to make it work. All I ask is for fidelity, affection, and for her to support my goals.

>>17389228
>I am not planning on anything going wrong

That being said, I will do further research on what could indeed go wrong, just in case...

>>17389023

Don't get married. Trust me.

>>17389882
Well, first I'm going to propose. Then if things work out, we'll get married