Would a relationship between a 20 year old girl and a 36 year

Depends on a few things like both your maturity levels, what you guys are wanting out of your lives (careers, family etc...). Also, im just assuming this is meant to be long term.

To put it one way: Four years ago he would be twice her age.

To put it a different way: Why not? Age is just the number of rounds around the sun's path through the Milky Way. It totally depends on the parties involved.

To put it yet another way: In most cases no, but not because he's too old for her, but because she's too young for him.

Didn't you already make a thread about this?

No, it probably won't work out. You're still basically a child and he's a full blown adult

It depends

>>17388814
Are you the person from before who met a german guy or something in france and you're from new zealand?

>>17389604
Why?

>>17389612
Because someone else posted this, this morning. So are you or aren't you?

Also, no they never work. I'm assuming you're the 20 year old girl because the 36 year old man doesn't ask himself these questions.

>>17389616
>doesn't ask himself these questions
What do you mean? So he is uninterested?

>>17389618
Its means he should be mature enough not to fuck around with a 20yr old

>>17389626
I guess so, so why did someone in that thread said it may work?

>>17389618
No, it means men don't give a fuck about age. They already believe a woman who could be their child's age could also be a sexual partner for them.

And from this response I know you are the 20 year old woman because you are afraid he's uninterested. What do you think he's done all these things and is so accomplished or something and how would he ever be interested in you?

>>17389643
Because people differ? Love isnt science.Altough what science knows about love suggests this kind of relationship is conditioned by certain psychological patterns

>>17389655
So there is no rule to say whether it will work or not
I think the distance is more of an issue

>>17389651
Well you and that previous poster's response differ. I was questioning if it is because of this or that

>>17389674
The thing here is...why? You see, women look for older men for their matureness.Men look for for younger women because the old ones have their tits fallen.The trick here is that he is on an advantaged position because he already tolerated 20yrs old bullshit enough to be one step ahead from you mentality

>>17388814
It's not a problem unless you think of it as one. What other people think of your relationships/choices doesn't matter as long as you aren't doing pedo shit

>>17389674

No, age is an issue, too. But whatever make your mistakes on your own. You want to date him and are intent on dating him, so just date him. Stop asking people if they think there will be troubles because of things like age and distance. You know there will be, but you want someone to tell you, "Oh no! There won't! You guys will be just fine and make such a cute couple!" etc.

Age is an issue. Distance is an issue. You're young. Have you even had relationships before? Fucking is a part of a relationship that cannot be done from overseas long term. The issue with age is that you are overly naive. And he will lead you to where he wants and dictate your life. Not in a lifetime movie, he beats you type way if you don't fold the towels right, but you will understand this advice not at 20, but at 30 or 40, so remember it and remember you were told and could have avoided it like you saw the future, but ran towards it anyway because you said, "But I really like him!" to yourself.

>>17389683
What do you mean because of this or that?

>>17389706
This >>17389626 and that >>17389651

>>17388814
A 20 yo girl is mature enough to decide who she wants to date. If you think it's weird that she's into a 40 yo guy or something, who cares? She's not a child, and she doesn't need protection.

>>17389703
Yes I had a relationship before.
What makes you think I am naive? Because of my posts or simply because of my age?
>And he will lead you to where he wants and dictate your life
But this can happen with all men, like a guy pressuring his gf into doing things he wants. But I guess my young age makes me more vulnerable.

>>17389722
A 20 year old isn't fucking mature. They're an adult, but they're still a fucking punk bitch. And who's trying to protect her? We're just telling her why it wouldn't work, which is part of the question she asked.

And I'm telling her to go and make her mistake which will destroy her life. Do it. You'll understand and will listen to me in 20 years, but not now you won't

>>17389726
You're right. You're a grown up and you should just ignore these dumbasses trying to 'protect' you. Older men are attractive to a lot of girls and that's completely normal. Honestly, go for it.

>>17389737
Op here. Most likely this will end up in a break up before anyone relocates so I don't get how this will "destroy my life"

>>17389745
Lol

>>17389726
Because of your posts. If it was because of your age I would have little room to speak, but I know from watching and listening to women who have already lived their lives.

I don't mean pressuring you into things he wants, I just mean he will always take the lead. He will always know more than you even when he doesn't.

>>17389750
Girls like being lead

>>17389750
Why does my posts make you think I am naive? This is just something I am genuinely curious about. What makes people think of me like that?
And is having him take the lead a really bad thing? Seems like so from what you guys shared

>>17389754
Girls like to contradict themselves

>>17389747
He's projecting his own insecurities onto your situation while knowing little about it.

He was probably like in college and some bitch left his beta ass for an older guy, then the guy was mean to her and she still liked him cause he was badass. Now he must come to your rescue.

>>17389759
That's very true

>>17389757
Depends on the kind of leader.Rwanda<Finland

>>17389770
Don't forget North Korea

>>17389757
Because whatever anyone says you ignore it. Like I wrote you're the 20 year old because the 36 year old wouldn't ask. And you just jumped like so does that mean he's not interested? Like it's not specific, you just sound jumpy like a puppy and gushy. Not grounded. Just met a guy, no definite plans, asking a bunch of internet douchebags if he likes you, twice, (like really come on, instead of calling the man and asking him if he would be interested in going to dinner.

You seem impulsive and indecisive, but still able to jump the gun. Which is fine if you want to just go somewhere and drive and find something fun to do with your day, but not something to do with the serious matters in life.

Whatever you decide. I don't care. I'm going to bed. Whether you do or don't it's your life, but why the fuck are you asking complete assholes who don't know him, which you don't either, if he likes you. Just fucking ask him out on a date if you're so interested in him. What is it fucking rocket science?

>>17389764
I have no insecurities and don't date women, it's just from talking to older, married women I went to college with and from the women in my own family.

>>17389804
Older, married women have long accepted that they aren't gonna get the guys who once made them so invested.

And you're still assuming a lot about this guy.

>>17389798
I am scared of being rejected. Things will be so awkward then. I mean, there is a reason why people tend to say "don't ask out your coworker"
I am not impulsive. I know my coworker often flies here for work but I definitely cannot relocate in the next 4 years

>>17389790
Best Korea.

>>17389843
You're a woman, so dating a coworker isn't really that big of a risk. Just ask the man out. I've been turned down before, and ultimately, the awkwardness is only there for the next day or so. It's not excruciating.

>>17389852
But it will still be an LDR and I am not into one night stands. And idk, I am still scared he will reject me because he sees me as a kid.

>>17388814

Probably not. You're a child and the guy is half way dead. What's gonna happen 1 year from now? 3? 5? 10? Too different stages of life to make anything long term worth while.

>>17389854
The reason your here asking, though, is because you really want this guy. If that's the case, then put yourself out there. You'll never know unless you take a shot.

And think of it from his shoes, A LOT of 36 year-old men would be pretty excited by a young 20-year-old girl wanting to be with them. You only live once.

>>17389872
>You'll never know unless you take a shot
Even if I cannot relocate in 4 years? He often comes here for work though (like once every 4-5 months?)

>>17389884
He'll be an on-and-off thing, then. You sound like you want him, though. If you wanna do it, do it.

>>17389872
Plus I know that I am average looking. I think he is somewhat above average and he seems like the type of guy into fashion. I think my taste in clothes is pretty average
Btw my age is actually 19. Didn't post my actual age here as I don't want people to recognize me. I will turn 20 very soon though.

>>17389884
You will be her little slut, and he will be your daddy.

Sound ok to me m8

>>17389889
But isn't a 4 years too long for an LDR? Some people said one has to relocate between 1 - 2 years as the other person may want to cheat.

>>17389895
Will he only see me as a girl to fuck with when he travels here?

I am a 36-year-old man who had a huge crush on my 20-year-old female co-worker and I felt that it was not my place to make the move. I didn't want to be that creepy old guy. If she had come on to me at all, I would have been totally into it.

>>17390026
But look >>>/trv/1142775

>>17390066

Well, that's probably right, in general. And it's certainly likely that the age difference would have eventually broken us up. But I would have been sincere, myself personally. Perhaps that says something wrong about me--I certainly don't feel particularly mature, or any enormous gap between myself and younger co-workers. I probably am an old creep and man-child or whatever. But I liked her as a person, as well as finding her hot, and the age gap would be about the same as that between my own parents, so who knows.

The real point was, he probably will never make the first move if he's not an asshole.

>>17390096
As a girl not into one night stands, should I ask him out? Is anything long term possible, considering that relocation is not possible for me within the next four years?

>>17388814
I'm a 21 year old guy and dating a 47 year old woman for 2 years now. Frankly we don't make the age gap a big deal.

>>17390121

It's impossible to say. Why don't you ask him out and talk about relationship stuff if he says yes? Not like "what are we" but just in general, what he's looking for, etc? You don't have to fuck him on the first date, even if you asked him out, you know.

Communication! The only way to bridge this age gap.

>>17390136
>Not like "what are we" but just in general, what he's looking for, etc? You don't have to fuck him on the first date, even if you asked him out, you know.
Sounds good but seems awkward. If he is into something serious as well, shousl I try to pursue an LDR with him?

>>17390136
And what if he is dishonest when I ask him about what he is looking for though?

>>17390187

literally just your gut feelings. You have to feel this stuff out for yourself. How can we answer? You can do an LDR if you want. You can not if you don't want. Sitting here daydreaming is the only way it will be perfect, but if you want something in the real world you have to take real world action and trust your own ability to make the right decisions, read signals the right way, etc. And the only way you can learn to do those things is experience, so get out there. If this is the guy you want to ask out, ask him out. It literally does not oblige you to anything at all.

>>17390205
I have very little dating experience and I don't know if an LDR is possible if I cannot relocate within the next four years.
My parents will definitely not approve of it. They will probably assume that he only wamts me for sex and that the age gap and geographical distance is too large. My friends may find it weird

>>17390205
Plus there may be rumous everywhere in the company. I don't want that. I am a temporary staff but I want to work there temporary every year.

If your mind set is marriage, just know you'll be dealing with the end of life stages 20 years before most couples do. Prepare for it, losing a spouse is hard

>>17390286
Wow so if I pursue an LDR relationship with him, we are heading down the path of marriage? I am still young and I don't know if this is too early for me

It depends on a lot of factors, but generally it will not last

File: image1.jpg (119KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

119KB, 640x480px

>>17390345
You have to see this thing as a learning opportunity, first and foremost. You also have to not be afraid to make mistakes. It is entirely possible, indeed probably quite likely considering the age difference and the actual geographical distance, that a relationship with this dude won't work long term. But that's not a reason to give it a go. Most people's first few relationships don't work out anyway, even if the couple lives in the same tien and are the same age. You get better at making relationships work the more of them you experience. Experience is everything. It's hard to make this stuff work; long term relationships take serious graft. The more experience you have, the more likely it is that you can make something last. However, don't feel that you can't learn while in a relationship either. You just have to get stuck in and try.

We don't know much about this dude, or you for that matter, so the advice we can give is limited. Maybe he'll reject you. Maybe he'll just want you as an occasional fuck buddy. Maybe it'll work beautifully. You don't know, no one does. You have to put yourself forward and ask him out, because I do think it's highly unlikely that he'll ask you. Too risky for an older dude, everyone will think he's a creeper. So just ask.

Let me put it this way: would you feel better never exposing yourself to possible rejection, or spending all your life wondering about what could have been? It's embarrassing being rejected, but it gets easier to deal with the more it happens. It's all about experience, see? He'll at least be flattered you asked, and he won't be a dick about it. I can tell you from personal experience that regretting missed opportunities is harder than embarrassment.

You're young. You can't spend your life worrying about this shit. For better or worse, you have to expose yourself to possible pain and heartbreak, because it's the only way you'll grow. Children are afraid, adults try things. So go grow up.

i cant take little bimbos seriously
they are for fucking
i suspect at one point this would annoy the little bimbo and she will look for something more similar to herself

obviously i would never tell this to her, since i like to get my dick wet
more like
>age is just a number teheee

>>17390690
>Experience is everything
Even if it involves asking out a coworker? I want to work at the company again this year.
I asked about this on Reddit and someone said the chances of it working is close to zero due to cultural, geographical and age differences.

>>17390699
Yes, even asking out a coworker. How will you know what that's like if you don't try it?

>>17390731
>How will you know what that's like if you don't try it?
That person on Reddit said that the chances of it working out is close to zero so I should not ask him out. You guys are suggesting totally different things

Btw I am scared of him finding my thread
Anyway, he asked for my age and commented that I look older than my actual age. He then asked me to guess his age and said that he is old. Is this a sign that he is into me?

>>17390738
Even if he rejects you, the experience will a valuable one. It's All valuable experience, don't you understand? If he says yes, then great. If he doesn't, so what? You learn how that whole process went, you grow more used to the feelings before, during and after. I asked out like half the people I worked with last year, they all said no. And I'm good friends with those same women to this day.

You've just got to out yourself out there and see how it goes. Any further deliberation on this really is just procrastination. Stop being such a coward, and experience life.

>>17390754
But there is so much stigma attached to all of this. Plus I don't want him to think that I am into one night stands
You still haven't answered if him asking for my age is a sign that he is into me.
Idk that Reddit user says that anything long-term is basically hopeless

>>17388814
My father was 50 when he met my mother that was 25 years old. They were quite happy together. Sure it didn't last they have been together for 6 years but that doesn't really matter. When I asked them if they would do it again both said yes.
If you want to be with him just go for him. If you break up after few years so what? You would break up with many guys your age too.

>>17390802
>If you break up after few years so what?
He is a co-worker and I don't want rumours to spread around the company. My friends and parents will probably frown upon the age gap

>>17389843
This is why you are immature. You've invented a whole relationship in your head before you've ever asked the guy out, before you even know if he's interested in you. And it wouldn't be awkward if you didn't act like it's a big deal.

And frankly you're crazy. You want to relocate? To date this man? Ridiculous!

>>17390911
What if I get rejected though? I want to work at this company again and I don't want rumours to spread. And he may find the age gap disgusting
>And frankly you're crazy. You want to relocate? To date this man? Ridiculous!
Shouldn't an LDR end with someone relocating or it will not work?

>>17389893
You really are a child and you are playing a stupid game. Do you know if he's married? And going to a place every 4-5 months isn't that often. It's 2-3 times a year, unless he's staying for months at a time.

Also, you don't seem to have high self esteem. That's not a good way to go through life in general.

And yeah, he probably will see you as someone easy to fuck because he doesn't have to do anything for you. He just has to show up for work, you're just a bonus.

And if he may cheat, who's to say you're not the one he's cheating with and not the one being cheated on.

>>17389898
You seem to like to live in Lala Land. You haven't asked him out and you're planning to live your life with him. And drop everything for him.

But since you like to imagine an entire relationship with this guy, what are you going to do when you want to have kids? When do you want to have them? Think how old he will be. What if he says he's got 'em and doesn't want them any more than what he's got, where will you be if you want kids?

>>17390249
See your story changes over and over. Before you were 20, and in the previous thread, he was 33. Then he was 36 and you were 20, now he's 36 and you're 19.

Before you had been in relationships before and had experience. Now you have little experience. You are open and WILLING for manipulation and you are loving it, baby.

You say you have low self-esteem and I'm going to say that is why you are pining after some old man with a crooked dick.

Do you not think you have a chance with guys your own age?

>>17390935
No I mean what is the point of asking someone out if you know it is unlikely to work? I asked it on Reddit and someone said the chances of it working is close to zero
I don't think I will ever want kids, but as someone may say, everything can change

>>17390690
Why should any one be having their first relationship with someone so many years advanced from them? That is insane.

Make a mistake or use someone her own age as a learning opportunity. Learn with someone who would be learning too!

>>17390928
You are not in a relationship. You can't relocate to be in a relationship, if there is no relationship. So why are you asking hypotheticals instead of looking at what's right in front of you?

Him asking your age does not mean he's into you.

People get rejected all the time and no one thinks anything of it. If you suck his dick in an elevator or under a desk then there will be rumours, but asking someone out for dinner isn't going to make the sky fall on your head.

But if you think all that will happen if you get rejected and really don't want to lose the job, then don't do it stupid. It's simple and easy, but you want to have your cake and eat it, too.

>>17390930
Should I ask of he is single or not?
>>17390939
I am changing details as I do not want people to identify me. Some stuff in this thread is slightly false.
So should I not ask him out? I swear I will not have sex on my first date
>>17390947
I really like him and I think he is really sweet. I've always had a thing for older men

>>17390944
Ask him out or don't, figure it out, but stop making shit up in your head.

You're 19. You don't want kids now because you are a kid yourself and there is nothing wrong with that. Some people say you want them when you meet the right guy, but once you have things of your own and can support yourself and have existed for a bit more, you start to think it might not be too bad to have them.

>>17390958
I don't know but I think it may not work out? Like he is older than me, I personally think he is more attractive than me and I think his family is more well off than mines

>>17390967
True. Well, some married couples choose not to have kids. It's more like I feel like it is too much commitment
Impossible to know whether that will change for me

>>17390966
You want to ask this man out and you don't even know if he's married or not. Do you know if he has children? And yeah, maybe if you want to ask a man out, you should ask him if he's already got a wife because if not then you're really just wasting your time.

What is false? No one can give you advice on a situation, if you're lying about what the actual situation is. What is he real situation? He's your teacher or something? Professor?

I'm not the same bitch telling you not to fuck him on the first date. You don't even have that or know if you can have that yet. And if he's married and you go on a date with him, oh you can bet there would be rumours.

How about you get to know the guy before you ask him out or something? How many times have you met him and talked with him? Tell me what the real situation is and I'll give you real advice.

Is most of your dating experience, what little there is of it, with older men? Give me the brief history.

Also, I'm guessing you're a virgin. So, what the fuck?

>>17390968

Then just don't ask him out. You have no definites, read your sentences, I think, I think. You don't know. Also, cut the crap. I hate when people tell me someone is so attractive when most of you people are attracted to hot dog shit. He probably looks like a regular 36 year old dude who isn't fat or something.

Also the wealth of someone's family means nothing. What is this Cinderella? They're not going to like you because you can't pay the entrance fee to the club?

>>17390970
Yeah, but a lot do. So, it's a toss up right now and I'm not going to say you're going to want to have kids and you don't know it yet, because I don't know it, but I'm saying leave the option open.

My girlfriends brother 35-ish just got married to a 20 year old girl. I don't think it's too strange, but there's probably going to be some hiccups.

A young girl with an old man is going to need to be satisfied some how.

>>17390996
I will ask him that
The time I will spend working there is not exactly the same length but around the same. I also changed our nationalities. Not that many people from my area uses 4chan.
He really is my coworker. I did have some teacher crushes in high school but I swear he really is my coworker.
I've talked a lot with him for these couple of days.
I've never had a date before. A guy from my high school tried to ask me out after graduation. I wasn't into him and said that "I was busy during that period".
I am a virgin. What is wrong with that?

>>17391016
>He probably looks like a regular 36 year old dude who isn't fat or something
Well true haha. I don't think my friends will understand why I find him hot.
Like you've said, I don't even know if he will reject me, so let's worry about kids later.

>>17391022

Honestly, I don't know what to say. You have 0 dating experience and want to take on a 36 year old man, who may or may not be married or have children.

Have you even finished college? Are you at an internship? Have you ever even been kissed?

No 36 year old would give up the chance for 20 year old pussy.

It's a bad decision and you're not worth a serious reply.

>>17391021
How long have they been dating?

>>17391061
I believe since she was just turning 18.

>>17391058
So if he says he is single, can I ask him out?
No, this is a part time job and it is temporary, no

>>17391064
Ate you aware if the fact that we are from different countries? More people on Reddit just replied and said the chances of anything long term happening between us is pretty close to zero

>>17391066
I honestly hope now that you are a troll. Or else you are completely insane or are just enacting a higher level of your teacher crushes from high school.

Every word you say makes this situation seem worse and worse. You haven't graduated college, you're a virgin, never kissed, never dated nobody, and have low self-esteem. The man may or may not be married, may or may not have children, you would see him 2-3 times a year, and he is only average looking. There is a 17 year age gap between the two of you, which makes it possible for him to have children around your age.

And you are asking me if you're allowed to ask him out. You're out of high school, you don't have to ask anybody if you can use the shitter anymore.

If you mean do I think it's a good idea, I and most people here and other places have told you no, but that's not the answer you wanted to hear, so you have not been listening.

>>17391074
Oh yeah, sounds like an internet fling or something.

One of my friends from Canada did talk to an older guy, I think she was not quite 18, and he was not quite 35, but she ended up going to I think it was Finland, and got married to him.

It lasted a few years, but he was pretty abusive and she was in a strange country with no friends.

>>17391074
American, Australian, or Canadian? Which one are you?

ITT: OP has daddy issues

>>17391088
Well in my previous thread, I said I was 20. That is too young to graduate from college here. I am not from the states, and it takes 4 years to graduate from uni. I don't understand why it is so surprising that I am still studying at my age. From what I've heard, in the states, you go to college for two years and then uni for two years or something. If that is the case, I will probably be at uni.
How is low self-esteem an issue?
Yeah the marriage and kids part is an issue.
Some people say it may work out though
Look I lied a bit here. I did meet him a year ago and we had an amazing conversation. We will meet soon. I just wanna know if we do have an amazing conversation again, should I ask him out?
I don't want to post here at the exact time when I am working at that company as I don't want people to identify me so yeah a lot of stuff here is hypothetical.
>>17391092
None of them

>>17391105
So then the conversation you had with the guy that is making you want to ask him out, happened a year ago?

It's not surprising that you're studying at 19, it's that a college freshman is trying to go after a 36 year old man.

Low self-esteem is an issue because people with low self-esteem let people treat them like garbage.

Some people say it may work out, but I see a lot more 'no's, tally it up like it's an election and see who wins.

But honestly after all of this, after saying all of this, I feel like you must be playing stupid because (almost) everyone has given you reasons as to why not to do it, but you keep telling yourself you want to do it and keep ignoring what everyone has said.

>>17391060

This anon said it best. Really.

>>17391134
>it's that a college freshman is trying to go after a 36 year old man
Yes it is not very common. Is that an issue?

Why is it an issue? The stigma or the fact that I may be treated like trash?

If I have higher self esteem, would it still be an issue?

In the past, I thought it would be impossible for anything to work out between us two, but recently I created a thread about adding him on Facebook and someone said I can try asking him out if I am interested in him.

Look, I will work there in the future and I really don't want to post on 4chan then as I don't want anyone at the company to identify that thread. I know that a lot of things in this post is hypothetical.

Say, if he is single and has no kids, can I ask him out? I know I guess there are a lot of "nos" here, but the number of "yeses" still surprised me (some Redditors said it will definitely not work)

>>17391147
I am leaving. I will not reply to this thread any longer. You are not listening and do not want to listen. It is why you keep trying to find a loop hole through the 'o' in no.

N O. It will not work. Good-bye.

>>17391134
And really, there are quite a lot of "yeses", maybe only a bit less than "nos"
And really, this is 4chan, I don't know if I should really listen to you guys
As some people said, take everything with a grain of salt and do your own research. I guess it most cases nothing long-term will happen, but as some people said, if you've never tried it, who knows?

OP here. So seriously question, as a 20 year old girl, is it a bad idea for my first date to be a 36 year old guy? Will guys in the future judge me for this? Can I just go for a non-sexual fling? Will people judge me for that too?

Alternatively, should I just keep in contact with him solely as a language exchange partner? Is that ok or will it be inappropriate/leading him to think I want his dick?

>>17391201
Bump