How do I stop being hyper clingy to every girl that shows a remote

>>17382357
Get fed up with your own behavior and simply stop being clingy.

>>17382357
It takes a lot of self awareness in the moment. Break the habit one conversation at a time.

>>17382394
How do I work on achieving this. A lot of it comes on automatically

>>17382409
Be aware when you do it.

>>17382416
Even when I am aware I get so anxious it happens anyways.

Work on your confidence before you try dating.
Seriously, this is the solution to literally problem in the dating world, it all stems from lack of confidence.
Also the golden rule, you can't expect anyone to love and want to be around you if you don't love and like to be around yourself. If you aren't good with yourself, fix that first and then you can try dating.

>>17382433
I mean, I don't think I'm bad looking or anything by any means.

I just feel socially inadequate. Like somewhere along the road my social skills just stopped developing properly. I seldom have anything interesting to say during conversations because I don't have a lot going on. Approaching new people to say hi scares the fuck outta be too.

Maybe I just need to accept I'm an "acquired taste" or something, idk

>>17382433
>Work on your confidence before you try dating.

No, no, NO. Think about the consequences of giving such advice. After listening to it OP may just say "fuck it" and go hermit mode and just lift weights and floss teeth for a year to gain confidence. No.

OP, go outside, talk to people, date girls and make lots of mistakes. Only this way you will gain real experience and perseverance.

The most basic law of nature says that to get good at anything you have to do it first without being good at it. It's literally impossible to bypass this.

Date girls even if you are clingy. Joke about your clinginess, wear it like armor, fucking own it.

>>17382457
How do I overcome the overwhelming fear I have of talking to new people? Like, I've tried on countless occasions but it always gets to me

>>17382462
Know that you aren't wrong, and find a way to get interested in the person.

>>17382357
Pretend you don't really care (and honestly why should you if you're not 100% sure if she does really like you).

>>17382357
By realizing girls are stupid meatbags just like you and aren't special at all.

>>17382441
Thats lack of confidence man, confidence isn't just about being physically attractive. Actually I'd argue it has nothing to do with physical attractiveness, since even a sold 4/10 can become a 7 easy with strong confidence. (Trust me, I dated a dude who I though was a perfect 10 at the time because he was so confident in his ability to get me, then years after when we broke up I realized wow, he's actually not really attractive at all.) Work on your people skills yo. The only way to do it is to just force yourself. I know, it's hard, really hard, paralyzing even, to just approach someone. In the words of Shia Labeouf, just do it. You just have to do it. And you will fail, you will have horrible awkward times, girls will laugh at you, and you will want to crawl into a hole and never try again. You just have to keep at it, and it will get better.

Just make friends and jerk off and stop trying to incorporate romance in your life just because thats what every narrative says to do.

>>17382457
No girl is going to WANT to date you if you're not confident though. You cannot get those "mistakes" until you fix yourself up enough for a woman to give you the time of day first. Everything else you're saying is exactly what I'm saying too though, that's how you build confidence. That's how you work on yourself. You force yourself to do the things you never thought you could, or didn't want to. Over and over, fail faster. But its not fair to drag another human being down your shit hole just to use them to climb out of it yourself, you see how selfish that is? If you aren't emotionally stable enough to date yet, then don't. Work on yourself, your people skills, your communication skills, whatever is causing you to feel this way, and only when you're ready enough, start dating.
Because I've been that person, the one who was the ladder to pull someone out of their own garbage heap and then ditched in that hole. My ex had a conniption about his virginity. So his idea of fixing his insecurity was getting a nice "practice" girl so he could move onto "better, more attractive women"
I've been the "practice" girl, and it don't feel good. I was used, abused, and tossed aside like trash so that he could follow that law of nature and get better at sex. And that only left me with a brand new eating disorder and trashed self worth, when I was such a stable fun person before. I had to dig myself out of that hole on my own, rather than doing what he did and drag someone else down there with me, and I'm not even out of the woods yet 6 years later. I still have the eating disorder, so I've resigned myself that I'm not emotionally fit enough to date again yet. Nobody deserves that baggage. I'm not just gonna throw people around so that I can get better. Neither should you. You can work on yourself in plenty of other ways before you get other people involved in your own bullshit.

>>17382591
>No girl is going to WANT to date you if you're not confident though.

I'm fucking tired of this whole be confident meme. It led me to self-improving myself for a long ass time, instead of just going outside. Confidence is in the eye of the beholder. There are many girls on this planet RIGHT NOW who would accept OP as he is, not even super confident.

I agree with you about the "practice girl" thing. It's a manipulative and selfish thing to do. So next time warn OP plainly about doing such thing first, instead of vaguely advising to improve confidence.

>>17382651
Yeah, girls who are equally as unstable and likely to just drag him further down will be ok with his instability. Non confident people who don't want to change or better themselves seek out and settle for other non confident people to "stay in their own lane". Getting 2 unstable people together does not make a stable one, you're just going to make each other worse.

He does need confidence. Sounds like you didn't actually do anything for your confidence, just stewed in your room and worked on your physical appearance and called that confidence boosting.
Like, did you read what I posted, I SAID to go out and talk to people. You can talk to people without dating them, you can have relationships with people that aren't romantic or sexual. Build on those first. You can't date someone if you're not friends with the first. Going outside IS boosting confidence. What you're saying is exactly what HOW you boost confidence, and exactly what I've been saying too. You're just in denial that you're somehow NOT gaining confidence by doing that.
And I had no implication that OP was going to use someone, it was specifically your advice of "Go out and practice on as many girls as possible and make mistakes outta them." I was commenting on. So I'm not revoking what I said. He does need to improve his confidence, I think you still have work to do too since you're very pessimistic about the process, but by doing precicely what were BOTH saying, sans your bad advice on using people to get there.

As I said, you can't expect other people to want to be around you if you don't even want to be around yourself. Fix yourself, then you can get other people to like you.

File: Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters - 030 - The Ultimate Legendary Soldier - Chaos Soldier Descends.mkv_snapshot_01.36_[2015.10.14_22.15.56].jpg (42KB, 714x480px) Image search: [Google]

42KB, 714x480px

you're scaring me OP

like seriously

>>17382357
The problem is that you likely don't have much is any experience dealing with women who aren't close relatives, authority figures, or potential mates. Because of this, any woman who isn't one of the first two types must be the third, and so you cling.

To fix this, get yourself some girl friends. Two words, mind: women you are not interested in romantically, but who you genuinely enjoy hanging around. This will give you experience in dealing woth women as something other than something to sleep with. Then, when it comes time to let someone go that you WERE interested in, you can transition her to this same state.

I recommend using meetups and clubs (special interest groups, not dance halls) to find the first few. That way you already know you have something in common that you can do when you hang out.

>>17382701
This is a really good advice.

>>17382701
Tbh usually if a woman is cool I can't help but develop feelings for her.

I'm emotionally a child holy fuck

>>17382591
>>17382651
>>17382690

Are there any tips to just kinda.... escaping my mind when i feel anxious or scared in social situations

>>17382421
train yourself to do something else when you feel like texting them open up an app instead for example

>>17382591
That's not true. Confidence isn't important at all anon. I don't fucking care about confidence, if I love someone, I'll love them even if they're not confident in themselves. And I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one with this mindset.