My dating life has been such a shit show of me going out of my

I can really use some advice on dating guys. I always hear dudes complaining that women don't give a shit and they're only after your assets (whether it's money or ur junk; maybe both) and here I am giving dudes my all and getting spit in my face.

Do you have to not give a shit about the other person???

>>17371843
I have no idea. I mean in all honesty you will never know for sure if someone won't cheat on you. I mean my parents were together for 25 years and my dad still cheated. And it's not just them there's plenty of times were this happens. All you can do is trust someone. Which can be pretty hard, but it's all you can do. Also work on yourself as well, not just giving all to your significant other.

>>17371872

that's the debate here, so should I just keep things at "I" and "me" and no "we" or "us"???

You're trying too hard. Focus on your own needs. What do you want from the guy? What do you need from the relationship? When and how do YOU want to have sex? When you try to give your all, your identity fades and your partner loses interest.

Don't listen to the retards who complain about women being golddiggers. You won't get a lot of replies because they agree with you that men are just as bad.

Be confident and don't settle. Focus on what you want instead of what your partner needs.

Listen, you are probably just really bad at reading people. You think because someone's an awkward nerd they can't be Chad's and are automatically nice, but you're wrong.

It's okay to look for confidence, looks, and how funny they are. But the most important thing to focus on, is how they treat the people around them, everything from waiters to family. How they react to stress and when things don't go their way. How forgiving they are and how easily they let things go.

Being a jerk doesn't happen in a vacuum.
The signs are always there, but you're too infatuated maybe to see them.

>>17371973
It's neither you donkey. It's the perfect balance in between. Not me or i. Nor us or we. You think about yourself first, always, but not too much. Remember, you came into this world alone, and you'll leave this world all the same. Good friends and people are just a bonus along the way.

Find an elusive, well-adjusted INFP man if you want loyalty and monogamy.

>>17371991

that's the thing, would focusing on me make me become a narcissist?

>>17372000

yeah i've only now discovered noticing the red flags

>>17372025

that's depressing and true but everyone seeks companionship

>>17372040

idk have weird taste, example: idubbbz (ian carter) is like my perfect guy.

>>17372126
Don't seek it. You will find true companionship when you stop browsing for it. Just live your life, the way you want to. You'll find someone eventually.

>>17372138

I want to do this, I would think I'm doing this with the exception of developing feelings for a close friend. But he rejected me a few days ago so back to not looking.

>>17372126
> that's the thing, would focusing on me make me become a narcissist?

No. In a healthy relationship each partner seeks fulfillment of their own needs and supports the other one in fulfilling their own. You sound like you were codependent.

>>17372269

I was. Had a very rude awakening that changed everything for good.

>>17372126
>won't that make me a narcissist?
No. Even if it did, a little bit of pride and arrogance can go a long way.

>>17371843
Simple. You're giving them too much attention. Youre too needy. Youre a doormat. Youre allowing yourself to get used, then adding on by not respecting yourself so they dont respect you. Youre not letting them chase after you. You don't give your all to someone that quickly because people will take advantage of that niceness.

Grow to respect yourself.
Give them space.
Dont give in to requests or demands (or at least dont make it easy)
Let them chase after you once in awhile
Don't have sex with them on the 1st-3rd dates. Wait until you are ready.
Dont them them disrespect you.

>>17372363
When it comes to cheating. Ive found that men who are confident but let their gf or wife know that theyre feeling insecure (or sharing feelings in general) sometimes are the ones that dont cheat. Ive had guys that pretended to be confident and they refuse to share feelings and theyre the ones who flirt and cheat. In my opinion it comes down to respect. A cheater will almost always say that he loves his wife/gf but he wont say that he respects her. You dont want to give a man all of your attention (dont be needy, but do go all out & cook him his favorite meal sometimes) but you also dont want to give him too much space either (or else he'll find attention elsewhere).

One other thing is look at his family life. How well does he treat his mother? Does he love, trust and respect her? Does he treat his sister well? Does he respect his dad? Did either of his parents cheat on each other? If they did/didnt, ask him how he felt about it/would feel.

>>17371843

Hahaha whut? You didn't give 1-3 your all. Without sex you might as well just be a friend.
So yeah, no surprises there that they "dumped" you in order to have mature relationships that satisfy their needs.

4 and 5 were guys with tons of issues so no surprise either that these relationships went to shit real fast.

Protip, don't date weirdos with tons of baggage. Do put out daily.